Normally Monday nights are about reflecting on the home visits we did in Los Pinos. Tonight is a little different.
One of our "body guards" has a job for the next three weeks. He will be building stairs and gutters in his neighborhood in Los Pinos for a very good wage. Last week when we went into Los Pinos with his Mom and Carlos we saw him digging ditches. Carlos got to work for one day, until they discovered he could not continue because he is not 18 years old. I was concerned when I saw our other body guard, Ariel. He was digging ditches in the sun, on a hot day, with no water.
Carlos said it is not a big deal because the work is not difficult. Carlos said you just stand there unless the boss is watching. Thinking back, I realized that is exactly what Ariel was doing. He even had a crowd of neighborhood men standing around, talking to him. Apparently the boss was never watching while I was there because I never saw Ariel actually work.
It made me sad to think that the men, who knew they were making an exceptional amount of money, had no desire to work hard. Even to improve their own community. Disappointing.
Last week Molly and I discussed the idea of going into Los Pinos with Carlos. I asked Molly how she felt about it, since Carlos is younger and left Los Pinos to live outside of the city several years ago. She said she thought it would be fine. However, last night Molly called to ask how I was feeling.
My first thought was to pray about it. In general I try to let God lead me, rather than logic. But then I realized that if, logically, there is any question of safety, we should not enter Los Pinos.
Some things are worth a risk. Sometimes you can do something, knowing that you have good odds of being successful. But in this case, I told Molly that if we are not 100 percent sure that we are in the safest possible situation to enter Los Pinos, we should not go. Being 90% sure is not worth the risk.
We have plans to go to Los Pinos on Wednesday, in the safest manner possible. Today we decided mutally that we should not take any risks.
This afternoon I was thinking a lot about a specific situation. I was thinking about my options and had prayed about different ideas. Then, when I was neither thinking nor praying about the topic, I had the strongest feeling that God was saying to leave it in His hands. I felt like He was saying that He will handle it. I shouldn't continue to consider my own ideas because He will do it all.
That was a nice feeling. I was able to let go of the whole thing and have peace with the thought of doing absolutely nothing because God is in control.
