Today I am going to share with you a different sort of post. It may not be for you, but I feel it needs to be said.
Today I did NOTHING.
I was supposed to go to my English speaking bible study this morning. But yesterday I drank too much coffee (a half cup) and was wide awake at 2:30 a.m. which is dumb because I know I am sensitive to coffee, but I drank it anyway. I could make excuses for why I drank the half cup of coffee, but there is no need. This post is not about justifying.
I skipped bible study.
It was sunny so I wanted took advantage of the sunshine to get some laundry done. We are moving into the cold season now so good laundry days are fewer. (And I just remembered! I swore to my family I was going be in the US for January this year. Totally forgot to do that. January here can be cold and gloomy. It's my least favorite month of the year.)
I got the first load of laundry washed when the clouds settled in. My plan was to wash throw rugs and cleaning rags next, but with at the clouds, I decided to alter the plan. In the end I did get all of the clothes washed. Some are still drying inside of the house. The rain came as expected. However, laundry was not a complete disaster. I just have some rugs and cleaning rags to wash on another day.
The lady I met though a mutual friend yesterday sent me messages while I was washing. She has experience in running homes for children and reviving organizations that are floundering. She said she thinks that the refuge for sexually abused girls can trim their budget. There were a few more questions she needed answered, but she said unless the staff are getting paid huge salaries, which I don't believe they were, they can streamline their budget and become more sustainable. That was great news! I passed it along to my friends who are praying for the refuge and its girls.
Then I turned on the tv. Nothing was on and I felt like I really wanted to watch a movie, which is strange for me. I am not one to watch movies. But I was really in the mood for a good movie. So I watched "I Am". Wow. What an incredible documentary. I can't say enough about it.
The whole time I watched I wanted to take notes. I wanted to quote the movie and share the quotes like all of those little motivating things people post on Facebook. If every North American watched that movie and lived their lives with love, this world would be a better place. It was so inspirational!
It talked about the fact that we are meant to live in community with others. But as North Americans we are raised to become separate individuals. This is against our DNA! I think Honduras does a better job in many ways of living in community. In the US we are told if we are not independent by the age of 18 or 21 we are losers. Our parents raise us to go and live our lives away from them. We move hours and states and sometimes countries away from our family. And we are told we are weak if we depend on our community.
Guess what? Flocks of birds move as a community - even the crazy fast flying ones. Herds of animals made decisions to seek water and food as a community. Schools of fish move as one. But humans still can't figure out how to live as a community. We are not only raised to be individuals, but then we also accept labels that divide us. (That was my own addition to the movie.)
The happiest times I have ever lived, and the happiest people I know, were in community. They live and depend on others. In deep community. Sometimes we can live in shallow community and feel good about ourselves, but it is the deep, deep community that our hearts truly long for.
What makes your heart beat fast with hope and elation? What brings tears of joy to your eyes? If you eliminate any negative feelings, such as fear, the thing that makes our hearts beat fast and our eyes weep is an experience that we share in community.
After the movie I decided to cook myself some good food and watch another movie. So I watched "I am David". I recommend that too.
The point of this post is that today I did nothing. I cleaned my house, mopped the floor, tidied up, and did spend a little time in morning devotion. But I wasn't out doing "missionary" things.
Sometimes I think that, since I am living on your support, I need to be "doing" all of the time. I feel guilty when I am not. Today I realize that is not healthy!
So I am telling you outright. It's 4 pm. Tonight I plan to warm up the beans and tortillas that I had for lunch and watch a third movie or maybe read a book. It's a rainy day in Honduras and this missionary is going to relax. Without guilt.
Watch "I Am" if you haven't already! It's a great documentary.
