Dia de los Chicos

The day of the boys was even better than I hoped!  They were perfectly behaved, except for a few split seconds when they got overly excited about the automatic toilet paper dispenser in the men's bathroom.  But after that we used the women's bathroom, which was just as exciting with it's liquid soap pump and hot air blower for the hand dryer, after ONE piece of paper towel each from the dispenser.

Yes, the bathrooms were almost as exciting as the play area.

Erika was able to keep it a surprise, so the boys didn't know what to expect.  They just knew they had to be down at the corner where I always pick up Erika at 1 p.m.  Erika said that Junior kept saying it was 1 pm long before it was time because he was excited to go.

Everything was a fun experience from start to finish.  Riding in the car was exciting.  Since Lorenzo is 10, he got to sit in the front seat.  He loved that.  As he put on his seat belt he looked almost as proud as if he were receiving his high school diploma.  Junior wanted the window down so he could see outside.  You may know that it is not safe to drive with the windows down, especially in the area where these kids live.  I explained why my windows are tinted so dark (to deter thieves and so people can't see a single female in the car).  That made it easier for them to understand that we would roll up windows at stop lights or anyplace someone was walking in the street.  They were good about following that rule.  On the way home we joked that we don't want anyone to steal our left over pizza!

As we drove away I asked was if they wanted pizza or chicken.  Carlos, who hardly ever talks, immediately said pizza!  Junior was too busy looking out the window to answer and Lorenzo was so thrilled to sit up straight with his seat belt in the front seat, I am not sure he heard anything else going on around him.  They did all agree on pizza so we went to Pizza Hut which has a playland.

At first we were the only ones there.  Then two very skinny, NOT very rough and tumble kids came along, and then two small girls.  I thought to myself, oh no.  This might not be good.  But there was not one problem.  They all played together well and did just fine.  Later two boys in private school uniforms showed up and played much more loudly and aggressively, chasing the other kids and roaring at them.  But my three boys were perfect.  (Insert happy face here.)

Lorenzo, Junior and Carlos

Lorenzo

Erika and I decided to order a package which came with drinks for all of us, cheesy garlic bread, pizza and 2 desserts.  The boys played, then ordered drinks (horchata for all).

Carlos, Junior, Lorenzo

The cable tv with cartoons caught their eye for a minute, so everyone did an about-face.  Then they got back to playing until the cheesy garlic bread arrived.

Cheesy garlic bread

We held off on ordering pizza and played until the bathrooms became so exciting.  Then the pizza came quickly, and I was grateful for the distraction.

We can add our own cheese?!??!!

Marjory had some pizza too

As I watch the little kids eat things here (especially chips and junk food) I often think back to the way my sister-in-law carefully introduced one thing at a time, in a special order each week, into the diets of my nephews when they started eating soft food.  No judgement either way, just very different.  Here, the rule is basically, as long as the kids aren't choking they can eat it.

The pizza was great.  Best pizza I've had so far.  The waiter tried to tell me that take out pizza costs less because it is different.  I didn't believe him, but he sure was right!  Our pizza had lots of sauce and there were no bubbles of dough in the middle.  The cheese covered it all.  We agreed it was yummy!  The boys gobbled up their first piece which made me nervous we hadn't ordered enough.  They slowed way down on their second piece, and the third was boxed to go.  The pieces were tiny, but the dough was thick.

After more play time we had dessert.

Carlos with a smile and bright, shiny eyes.
This photo makes my whole day perfect!

Carlos doing somersaults

Lorenzo

Junior

Typical Junior
always hanging from something

Such a sweet boy

So good at sharing!

Marjory's first maraschino cherry - to match her new shirt 

Real sundae spoons were a hit!

Carlos

We shared two delicious desserts of whipped cream with pineapple and watermelon.  At first we were missing a spoon so the boys took turns feeding me.  When I thanked one for a bite of watermelon, then each of them wanted to find me a bite of watermelon.  Same with the pineapple.  They are so good at sharing!

At the end of the meal, the waiter (who was very interested in talking to me) told me he was very impressed with the way the kids behaved and how I am with them.  I told him it's easy because they are great and I love them!  Then he gave us a discount.

As we drove home the kids exclaimed, "Que Rico!" about everything from street signs to businesses.  Everything was good.  They piled out of the car full of smiles and happiness once they figured out how to open the door handles.   Four hours later, my heart is still full from spending the day with such special boys.

Long night

So glad I had this morning free!  Not sure what I would have done otherwise.  First of all I was up part of the night with a really messed up stomach.  I thought something was seriously wrong.  But once my stomach was completely empty, I was much better, with just a little stomach pain.  In the midst of all the bathroom activity I ran out of water.  No need to go into details about that.  It was not fun or pretty.

Then I got my taxes finished today.  I started them a long time ago, but the people who have prepared my taxes for the past 2 years are suddenly no longer able to send forms in anything other than PDF which means I have no way to fill them in.  So my Aunt Jan took on my taxes as well as all the others she is doing for her work.  We finished at 1 p.m., just in time to send them to Jody, my Power of Attorney in the US so Jody can sign them and mail in the money I owe.

Almost did them on Turbo Tax.  Glad I didn't!  Would have paid $1600 more.

Was supposed to have prayer group today, but it was cancelled yesterday morning and rescheduled for last night.  Unfortunately, my phone spent the whole day until 9:30 p.m. hidden in my truck, where I stashed it before we went into Los Pinos.  So I missed prayer group this week, which is disappointing, but couldn't be helped.

Still thinking about yesterday and looking forward to tomorrow.  Tomorrow is Chico's Day!  I am going to hang out with Erika and her little brothers, who always beg to come when I go pick up Erika.  They don't understand why I only pay attention to Erika these days.  So tomorrow we are going to have a day just for the boys.

Another sunny, hot, hot day.  No rain in sight.  Yesterday was 97 degrees while we were wandering around Los Pinos with no sunblock.  I am so burned!  Meanwhile everything at my church in Salt Lake is closed because of a snow storm.

Visits with Molly

Today was the kind of day I imagined for myself when I moved to Honduras.  I hope to have many more days like today

My friend Molly and I went to visit some of the people she serves in Los Pinos.  It was something we have been thinking about and praying about for a long time.  Molly hasn't been able to visit the families she works with for weeks due to gang violence in the area.  But we learned, and a local pastor confirmed today, that things have calmed down.  I prayed about it with my church group last week, then spoke to Pastor Paysen about it on Sunday as well.  Molly and I continued to pray yesterday, last night and today.  We felt confident about our decision to go.

Molly is looking for a car, so it is nice for her to be able to go with me.  I have the car, but I don't have the connections, so it is nice for me to go with her.  Cab drivers charge her extra to drop her off there because they know it is dangerous.  Some cabs refuse to take her at all.  She said that finding a cab to take her home can be tough too.

I am realizing more and more that our gifts compliment each other well.  Molly knows how to get a lot of things done.  She knows about resources.  I know about working with messed up kids and victims of abuse.  So we balance each other.  It will be interesting to see God's plans for us a year from now.

I have met the pastor who lets us park in front of his church once before.  He is super relaxed, yet very attentive.  I liked him since the first time we met.  He is not interested in what we can do for him, but is very willing to help us out in any way he can.  Today that meant letting me park in a safe spot.

Molly and I talked to him about having a Mother's Day celebration at his church.  We are inviting the mothers we know in Los Pinos as well as ladies from his church.  It should be a good way to network.  Even if we don't meet families we feel called to serve, the more people we know in the area, the safer it is for us there.  And of course, it will be a very fun day to celebrate the mothers.

As we stood on the side of the mountain, the pastor pointed out areas on the other mountain that are less safe than others.  He pointed to where a pastor from a church nearby had to leave because of the gang activity.  They tore her house apart, making it clear to her that they wanted her gone.

Pastor Nicholas lives right by his church, so he has his hand on the pulse of everything that is going on.  He has been there for long enough that he is known by the people in the area, so he doesn't have any problems.  He said he will talk to key people and let them know why we are around so they will allow us pass freely without problems.  That will be a big help to us.

The visits with Molly were great.  I can see she loves her families and they love her just like I love the families I serve in Los Pinos.  It seems like everyone is sick with dengue in Los Pinos.  I got a little nervous when a mosquito bit me, but that was the closest we came to danger all day.  Everything was really calm.

Nobody has water.  In the first house we visited a 6 year old boy has had diarrhea with blood in his stool since last week.  He is vomiting up his food.  But there is no water.  Thank God he looks basically healthy.  They were down to 2 little packages of tomato sauce in the pantry and some rice.  Molly brought some food.  She is also helping a girl who lives there to go to college and get a job so soon there should be an income in the family.  Just last night the girl was hired for a really good, professional job.  Everyone is really excited about it and proud of the girl.

We sat down for a while to chit chat.  Everyone teased me because my butt was too big to fit into a child's plastic seat.  I don't know if I will ever get used to being teased about being too big.  It's just something we would never say in the US, although everyone in the room meant it in a kind way.  I went home and talked to Fany about it.  She said that in Honduras men like women with side saddles and a butt, so I should take it as a compliment.  They even have a word for side saddles that is supposed to be complementary, not negative.  She said most Honduran women are not built that way, but wish they were.  I need to investigate her theory a little further before I believe it.  And I need to lighten up.

Another thing that happened in that house was so funny to me.  Very Honduras.  The lady said openly (in front of the 6 year old boy and a teenaged boy who accompanied us) that she has a lump in her breast and it hurts.  Of course, that part is not funny.  Molly encouraged her to go to the doctor, but she said she has a really hard time climbing back up the mountain if she goes down to the doctor, so it seems unlikely to me that she will go.  She turned to the lady next to her, twisted her bra around so her breast was no longer in the cup and said, "Feel!".  So the lady felt.  Then she said no, really push on it.  So the lady is pressing and with the other hand seeing how it felt compared to her own breast.  The lady with the lump exclaimed, "That is not normal."  At that point I embarrassed myself by cracking up out loud.  I tried to imagine this scenario, with a teenager and a young boy and a stranger visiting, in a home in the US.  I love how open Honduran women are about some things.  I really do.

The second home we visited was a really nice woman who has HIV.  She is the first person I have met in Honduras who I am aware has HIV.  I am sure I know more people, but just don't know it.  She looked very healthy and seems to be doing well, considering her circumstances.  The visit was really nice, but I don't want to go into details because I am not sure if her situation is public knowledge.

Lastly we went up to visit a person who wasn't home.  Some other family members invited us inside.  They talked about how they really can't work because there are four kids to take care of and also, someone always has to stay home to take care of the house.  I know many families in Los Pinos who don't dare leave their home unattended.  What a sad thing.  I am grateful my friend Ana's home is secure and she can leave when she needs to.

As we walked back out, some little kids who yelled, "Hello!" in English when we arrived, yelled "Adios Gringos!" in a sweet way.  Molly and I were burned to a crisp, although my skin didn't turn red until a few hours later.  Molly's burn was the topic of conversation toward the end of our travels.  Next time we will bring sunscreen and sneakers.  Those mountain trails were crazy today!

In each house we prayed over the families and praised God for all He is doing in their lives.  I can see how things are definitely very tough, but there is always a light.  Despite the illness and lack of food and water in the first house, there is hope with the new job the girl is starting and college in her future.  Despite HIV, the lady in the second house is fairly strong and has a productive business.  In the third house a young man was mistaken for someone else and shot in the head, but he is alive and his sister has a healthy, beautiful baby that I fell in love with.  There was always something good.

Yesterday I got to visit Ana and her family.  Samuel is learning so much in school!  Isabela is talking and talking.  She doesn't let her brothers get away with anything anymore.  She is full of personality.  Jired is trying to figure out a way to visit the US after he graduates from high school, and David is so tall!  He is almost not a little boy anymore.  He is turning into a young man right before my eyes!  I just saw them all 2 weeks ago, but each of them is growing and changing so fast it's amazing.  Samuel told me that he is too skinny.  I asked why.  He said he is not eating his vegetables.  (I used to always pester him about eating his vegetables.)  He said he loves broccoli, so I gave him a little bit of broccoli.  He gave me his word that he would eat it.

Hugs from Lorenzo!

The whole gang was there to greet me when I picked up Erika today!  Erika's Mom wanted to meet me so she came down to the corner and all of the boys were perched on a stoop in their school uniforms.  I got to see Junior, Carlos, and LORENZO!!!  Yay!  I smothered them all with lots of kisses and hugs and love.  It was awesome.  I also appreciate the fact that Erika's Mom wanted to meet me.  I talk to her on the phone all of the time, but we have never met face to face.

When I got out of the car to go talk to them Lorenzo was not with the rest of the crew.  I asked where he was and everyone pointed to the pulperia nearby.  After he made his purchase he came running to me full speed and leapt into my arms laughing.  It was awesome.  Man I love those kids.

We talked a little and they kept asking when they could go with me like Erika does.  I told them Erika and I will make plans but it won't be for a few weeks because I am busy on the weekends and they have school during the week.  Then Erika and I decided we will surprise them and pick them up on Thursday after school.  We are going to go to Popeyes and get chicken.  They can play at the playland there.  Since none of them have ever been to a fast food restaurant, except now Erika, I am sure it will be a big hit.

It shouldn't be too expensive to share a bucket of chicken.  I am realizing that the costs of doing ministry outside of a church, where they provided everything, is much more expensive.  But Erika is not asking for anything more than time.  I chose to take her to Wendy's the first time we met together so we could talk, once when we were out doing errands we had a smoothie, and today we went to Burger King.  Can you imagine nobody in her family has ever eaten fast food before this!  Good for them.  I think of kids in the US and no matter how healthy they are, they still end up with some chicken nuggets and fries here or there.  It's hard to comprehend the idea of a 16 year old who has never had McDonalds or Burger King in her whole life.

Today we made plans for the immediate future, a one year plan, and a five year plan.  Erika will enter 7th grade when she starts school in February.  I told her I know a place that she can complete 2 school grades in one year.  I suggested that we start on a regular schedule and if she feels like she cab handle it, she can do the 2 years in 1 for the second and third year of her studies.  It would cut out two years of studying, but Erika thought it would be too overwhelming.  She said she is fine with graduating at 22 years old.  Many people here graduate a lot older than 22, so she won't appear out of place.  She will keep it in mind as an option though.

We talked about hopes and dreams.  I asked if she imagined herself married with more kids one day in the future.  I thought for sure she would say yes, but her face spoke as loudly as her words.  She said very seriously that she does not want to be married or have more kids.  She did not seem bitter or hurt from her last relationship with Marjory's father.  (We talked about that too.)  She said she just doesn't want to be married unless God puts a good man into her life.  But she doesn't seem very hopeful for that.

Erika said that for now she is happy with the support of her family to raise Marjory.  She is not interested in boyfriends.  That sounds great to me!  I told her if she changes her mind, that she can feel free to talk to me about it because that is part of walking through life together.

We decided we are going to read a book together, although I haven't found the right one yet.  And we will get together to discuss it.  Once she has a bible, Erika would also like to continue doing devotionals.  When I was at the church she really liked the devotional part of the class, and reading biblical verses that pertained to the devotional.  I already have a devotional book for her, but we went shopping for bibles and found that they are $40-$55!  So we are still working on that part.

I had made a list of all of the things I appreciate about Erika - her timeliness, her positive attitude, her ability to continuously exceed my expectations, the fact that she is a great mother, the fact that she asks for nothing but my time, the fact that she likes to spend time with me and if I offer to let her have a few days off she'll say she wants to meet sooner.  Those were some of the things I told her.  I also showed her the personal goals I have made in regards to walking through life with her, which ranged from getting to know each other better, to buying a car seat and having "the talk".

We've already completed a surprising number of goals, considering we've spent less than three weeks together.  Part of that is due to her disposition.  She is always willing to get together and get things done.  I told her I thank God that He chose her to be the first person I work with in my new ministry.  There is nobody else I would rather walk alongside than Erika right now.  But I am keeping my eyes out for people He will call me to serve in the future.

I go to bed tonight with a content, peaceful heart and a smile on my face.  As I think over my time with Erika as well as those awesome hugs and kisses from Lorenzo, Junior and Carlos,  I know that I am loving the people that God called me to love here in Honduras.  What a great feeling!

Marjory enjoys Burger King

We learned today that Marjory loves french fries.  She eats them from the tip down until there is just a stub and then uses her whole hand to shove what's left into her mouth with her palm.  It's pretty funny to watch.  She is saying mamamamama and occasionally papapapa, but never dadada like babies in the US.  I thought that was strange.  She imitates sounds sometimes and is babbling a lot.  She is also taking her first steps.  Erika said that she wraps a towel around Marjory and let her practice walking.  Today Marjorie ate french friends and little bites of Erika's sandwich (Erika always gives Marjory the first bites), then fell asleep nursing.  She is a sweet baby with a good mommy.

Talked to Lorenzo!

AHHHH!!!!!  I am so happy my heart could explode!  I was just talking to Erika on the phone and first of all, she spent the evening working - and being paid for her work!  Also, I told her to say hello to her family, which is part of Honduran culture.  She said that Lorenzo was still up.  I asked if I could talk to him.  She said he was waiting next to the phone to talk to me!

I got to talk to Lorenzo for quite a while and it was totally a two way conversation!  I told him I love him and I miss him and I think about him all of the time.  All of those things are so true.  Of all of the kids at the breakfast program, I must admit I miss Lorenzo the most.  He said he is doing well, and school is good.  School is never good for him.  But I heard happiness in his voice, so that matters more than anything else.

Then Erika put Junior on the phone.  I told Junior that I saw lots of pictures with him when the groups came to visit.  I said he is famous with all of the groups from the United States.  He said he misses me a lot and I told him I miss him more!

Then Erika said that she and her father talked.  He would like Erika to take a class at a school that gives free vocational classes like baking and sewing.  She and her father agreed she would like to take English.  I told her that was a great choice since she was my star English student when we had classes at the church.  And I will always be around to help her out if she ever needs it.  I like the fact that they are talking about these things and that her Dad wants her to get an education!  They agreed Erika will focus on this until she can get into school again for her actual degree.

Today Fany and I walked over to the next colonia for me to buy eye drops.  Everything is burning around here.  It smells like smoke all of the time and my eyes hurt.  Fany's throat hurts.  So I needed to buy some eye drops.  We came across baby clothes on sale for $1 or $2.  I know I said my relationship with Erika will not be materialistic, but the clothes were so cute!  I got 2 dresses, one pair of stretch pants and a top, and those dry panty things you put over cloth diapers so wetness doesn't leak through.

Erika and I have plans for Friday until three when she is going to go to work making tortillas again.

She surprised me again today.  However, today I remembered not to jump to any conclusions as I have in the past.  I called earlier in the day and her mom said Erika would not be home until late.  I asked what time I should call back and her mom said 9 p.m.  Of course I wondered what she was doing out until 9, but I my gut didn't feel like it was anything negative.  Fany said that was too late for her to be out and I said yes, but maybe she is with family.  I figured I would ask the next time I see her, but tonight she told me she was with her father and they were working from 3-9 p.m.!  What great news!  I don't think that making tortillas brings in the big bucks, but I am thrilled that she is working, I am happy that she has an income, and it seems like a good thing that she is with her father too.

Lady's Day Out

I just realized I never wrote about what happened when we took Erika to enroll in her new school.

Fany went to this school and said it is really good, a perfect schedule for Erika as a mother, and not expensive.  It was Fany who made the phone calls and arranged for us to go talk to a teacher.  She offered to go there with us and show us around.

We drove to El Centro (downtown) and parked in a safe lot a few blocks away.  I haven't walked around downtown since 2009 when I got caught in the riots after the president was pulled out of his bed and taken out of the country.  This time was so much more relaxing!

As we approached the school Erika was clearly excited.  She had a huge smile as Fany pointed out the polo shirts that are the school uniform.  Kids were streaming out of morning classes.

We got in the gate by following a car that was passing through, but a guard stopped us and we were not allowed into the office building.  He said the director has given them orders not to allow anyone else inside.  Classes are full.  Nobody else can enroll until next November.  Classes will begin in February 2016.  No way around it.  Nothing we can do.  That is the soonest Erika could go to school there.

Disappointed we decided to go back and feed the birds in front of the cathedral.

Laura throwing feed to the palomas

Laura, Erika, baby Marjory and me

Then Fany took Erika to see where she would pick up a bus if she does attend school, so we got to see more of El Centro.  We did some window shopping.  I tried to imagine Erika taking a bus or collectivo to school each day.  Those are the only two options, but I am NOT happy about the idea.  She'll have to walk on a few blocks where she will have to be very aware of her surroundings, but having grown up in Los Pinos, I am sure she is accustomed to that.

It was nice to see Erika excited about school.  Fany noticed it too.  It was also nice to get out and build experiences with her.  Fany and I continue to see Erika as a good mother to Marjorie.

Although we were not successful in getting Erika enrolled, we made the most of the day and had a good lady's day out.

Second attempt at Erika's school

This morning I was getting ready to walk out the door to pick up Erika when I got a message that her father's phone had tried to call me, but was out of minutes.  So I called the phone expecting that Erika was going to back out of our meeting.  Nope!  She was just calling to confirm.

Fany and I called the new school to see if they are still accepting students.  They were not able to say by phone.  We have to go there and talk to the teachers to see if the teachers have space in their classroom.  They were closed today, so we will go tomorrow.

I picked up Erika and we went to the school and met a lady named Gladys who was really kind.  She called the school where we want to enroll Erika, but nobody there could answer her questions about the requirements of the school, or what paperwork we need.  It seems that the schools in Honduras just changed to a computer system where they can do transfers on the internet.  The school records used to be handwritten.  Gladys is not sure what to send to the school.

Gladys took us to see the director for the transcript.  Thank God for Gladys, because that director was just as mean as I remember.  When Erika told me she has been trying to get the transcript, but the school wouldn't give it to her, I thought it sounded odd and wondered if it were true.  Now I totally believe her.  I'll just say the director is a piece of work.

When she recognized who I was and what I was there for, she said, "We have not had time to prepare the transcript."

I responded with a smile, very calmly, "That's fine.  We are patient."

Well, this lady doesn't like smiles or calm people.  She is the type who is not happy unless she is "stealing the peace" (a Honduran saying) of someone else.  She started talking about papers that she gave to Erika two years ago.  None of those papers were the transcript.  But she said that Erika should use those papers and go to the school to see if she can enroll with just that.  It was clear that she assumed Erika no longer had the papers and was ready to criticize if we asked for them again now.

I checked with Erika to see if she still had the papers after two years and she said she does.  So we started to leave.  When the director saw us leaving without allowing her to steal our peace she started saying that Erika better not get pregnant again.  That was of the blue (in front of a whole classroom of kids).  She went on to say that babies do not deserve to be brought into this world to be neglected.

At that point I could not be quiet.  I told her that she can see Erika's baby is chubby, healthy and well cared for.  I said I have observed Erika to be a very dedicated mother.  You will never find Erika without her baby.  Marjory is with Erika every place that Erika goes.  Of course we do not want Erika to get pregnant again, but we should also look for the best in people, not assume the worst.  Erika has shown me that she is responsible and has changed a lot from what she was doing two years ago.

The truth is that I do want to sit down with Erika and talk about boyfriends and if she is sexually active.  But we have only been at this for two weeks.  I can have that talk with her now, but I was concerned up to this point that she may not feel comfortable telling me the whole truth.  What good would it do to push her into a conversation before she trusted me enough to tell me the truth?  So we are going to have "the talk" this week.  My gut says she doesn't have a boyfriend (or a physical relationship with a boy), but I could be wrong.

When we left, Gladys (the other teacher) walked us out and started talking to me in English.  She gave me her phone number and said she wants to help in any way she can.  I told her I will call if we cannot get Erika into school with the papers she has tomorrow.

Gladys said there is so much need, many of her students go without a daily meal.  I told her that I am very aware of that truth.  I told her about the breakfast program and said although it is about a 2 mile walk, there is food there every morning, Monday through Friday.  If kids are going hungry, it could be worth the walk.

She introduced me to a girl who she was hoping I would take under my wing named Osiris.  She appears to be about 11 or 12 years old.  Osiris walks miles and miles from Los Pinos to this school, which is outside of the city.  Gladys was hoping that I could pass by the girl's house and see the living situation, but after talking briefly with Osiris I learned she lives in Sector F, the worst part of Los Pinos.  My friend Molly, who has been working there for years and knows lots of people there, has not been able to go there for weeks.  There is no way in the world I could go in right now knowing nobody.  Osiris agreed.

Gladys is concerned because Osiris believes she has nobody who really cares about her.  Osiris walks the long walk home collecting plastic bottles and scraps of metal to turn in for money for food.  Otherwise she doesn't eat.  So far Osiris has not turned to illegal or immoral activity to feed herself, but Gladys is concerned with all of the temptation there is on the streets that one day Osiris will turn to an easier way to earn her food.  Once again I encouraged her to go to the breakfast program at the church and said I will pray for Osiris.

If God does want me to be in Osiris' life, He will show me a way.  I don't want to sound cold, but I did not feel a tug from God in this instance.  There are so many needs, I can't possibly meet them all.  All I can do is be open to hearing from God as to how I should meet the needs of those He calls me to serve.

I told Gladys in Spanish, so that Erika could hear, all of the good things I have seen in Erika over the past year.  I said although you guys don't believe it, I have seen a lot of changes in Erika.  She wants to go to school - it was her idea, not mine.  She is a great mother.  She is always on time for our meetings.  I believe she is very responsible.  Gladys was quick to point out to Erika and me that it was not she who said the negative things.  I apologized because she was right.  Gladys never said a negative word.  I told her that I do have faith Erika can turn her life around because when I was 16, Erika's age, I was a mess.  I skipped school and was disrespectful to my teachers.  (And that is leaving out half the story.)  I was just horrible, I told her.  When I was 16 years old, nobody would have guessed that one day I would be a missionary in Honduras.  And here I am.  So there is surely hope for Erika.

Could you please turn that music down?

Today is a joyful day for several reasons.  Of course, it is Easter!  I feel like I have been celebrating since last night.

When I first moved to Honduras and lived in this same house I loved listening to the music from the Catholic church across the street.  I didn't have cable or internet, so I would sit and read with their song in the background.  The church is a huge building with a roof that is angled, but in some places 3 stories tall.  It has lots of windows.  Last night I learned why I can hear the music so clearly.  For the first time I went inside the gates of the church.

Turns out the alter faces diagonally, right at my house.  I was dressed in cut off jeans and a tee-shirt or I would have entered the church.  Almost all of the seats were full.  The incense wafted outside.  I finally got to put a face with the man's voice that I hear singing all of the time.  There was a flute and some other musicians.  At 11:35 it got really rowdy.  They were singing, "He is resurrected from the dead." until midnight.  In Spanish it is a little odd because the word for 'resurrected' is like 'resuscitated' and I had to push the image of someone doing mouth-to-mouth on Jesus out of my head.

I had a restless night.  Even with the house closed up, the music was hard to sleep through.  But how do you get upset about people singing that Christ has risen?  At 4:28 a.m. they got REALLY loud.  Woke me out of my deepest sleep of the night.  This time it was a lady singing.  It was beautiful.  I could feel the Holy Spirit moving from all of the way over here.  Pretty awesome when you realize that by that point they had already been in the vigil for over 9 hours.  I vowed to myself that next year I am going to change out of my cut off jeans, walk over there, and stay for a little while.  Not all 12 hours, but for a while.

My church service was nice too.  At my church we have a different theme that we fast for during the first week of each month.  Last week we fasted to pray for children who are being abused or neglected and healing for adults who were abused as children.  I was super excited about this fast.  The topic is something very close to my heart.  But last week was the worst I have ever done at fasting.  It wasn't the eating part that was hard.  I just could not focus on the fast like I should have.  Other things came up and I allowed them to get in the way.  Then I got mad at myself for allowing things to distract me from the fast, which was not helpful either.  I was pretty discouraged.

Friday I called my friend Carol and asked if I could talk with her.  She is someone I can always turn to for advice.  I can count on her to tell me the truth, even if it is something I don't want to hear.  Carol's advice is biblically based too, so I know it is sound.  We got together for dinner Friday night to talk about the things that were getting in the way of the fast and to watch The Passion of the Christ.  After our talk my heart I was not as confused.  She had some words that really hit home.  She even sent me some bible passages to read the next day.  I did better at fasting on Saturday.  But that was the only day that I can say I was really focused.

Today I talked everything out with Pastor Peter and Pastora Ruth.  After speaking with them I not only feel peace, but also joy and excitement.  I am blessed to have so many people I can turn to for advice.  Fany was out of town for the week, but between Fany, Carol, and my church I always have someone to turn to here.

The power went out this morning.  I was worried it was going to stay out all day like it usually does when it goes out on Sundays.  I hadn't showered in a while, so I was pondering whether I was fit for church.

We are still trying to conserve water.  This week we only got a half hour of water from the city and it wasn't pouring into the cistern very hard at all.  It sounded more like drops than the usual gush of water I hear when the water comes.  There has been no rain for weeks, although I could smell rain close by yesterday.  Big chunks of ash are falling from the sky.  I am not sure where the fires are, but the wind is strong, carrying ash in pieces larger than I have seen before.  Now we are not only sweeping up tons of dust on the patio, but huge pieces of ash too.

I am glad the power came back on this morning because today I was presented with a cool opportunity!  After church I was asked if I would direct the service in two weeks.  I've never done anything like this before.  Directing means I start things off.  I can present a bible verse that God gives me, or share a testimony, or whatever I think God leads me to do.  It can be long or short.  Then I ask if there are any new people and welcome them.  Then I pray for the offering and ask someone else to pray for the person who is giving the message.

When they first asked me to "direct" the service my heart almost stopped.  But as I stood clutching my heart I realized that I have two weeks to prepare and other than having to stand in front of the church, it is not a big deal.  It is actually an honor to be chosen because all of the other adults in the church do it, so it makes me officially one of them.  Now I am excited.  Instead of being fearful I see it as an opportunity.  One of many more opportunities to come, I was told.

Holy Week is over.  Tomorrow things will go back to normal.  I am meeting Erika to take her back to her old school to get the transcript.  I like Erika more and more each time I meet with her.  She is a really special girl.  Now we just need God to show Erika how special she is.

The Day Between

Oh, the joys of those who are kind to the poor!
     The Lord rescues them when the are in trouble.
The Lord protects them and keeps them alive.
He gives them prosperity in the land
     and rescues them from their enemies.
The Lord nurses them when they are sick
     and restores them to health.

Psalm 41:1-3

I've been focused on the story of everything that happened for Christ and the disciples during this time.  But felt that today I needed a break.  (Thus the scripture above.)

What a strange day is Saturday of Holy Week.  It's a day between.  Between sadness of Christ dying for our sins, and the happiness of his resurrection.

This day has left me confused.  Not knowing how to feel.  Looking forward to tomorrow.

PS:  I smell rain!!!!!  What a blessing a good rain storm would be!

Caliente

On Wednesday I went to pick up Erika.  She asked if I was going to meet her where I normally do.  I assumed (wrongly) that she wanted me to drive closer to her house.  I did not want to get into the habit of driving into Los Pinos too deeply, so I said I would meet her at the usual meeting place.

I have to talk to Erika about being more open with me when it comes to her safety.  While I thought she was trying to shorten her walk, in reality she was using good judgement.

After spending the afternoon together I took Erika back to Los Pinos.  She asked if I could drop her off at a different main road.  I said sure.  She said the path she was taking last week is not safe.  People are being assaulted there.

Boy, did I feel like a schmuck for assuming that Erika just wanted to shorten her walk.  In reality, she was being wise.  She was looking out for her safety, my safety and the safety of her baby.

Los Pinos has been very "caliente" lately.  My friend Molly, who is doing ministry in an area of Los Pinos that is more dangerous, has not been able to do home visits in one area for over about a month. She says every time she speaks to the families who live there, another person has died.

That is why I have not done any home visits, and have no plans to.  Erika, herself, says it is not wise for me to go to her house.  We have a whole world to explore together.  No sense in putting anyone in danger.

Note to self:  Do not assume.  Ask questions.  Encourage open communication.  Reinforce in Erika that I respect that fact that she makes wise decisions.  Safety always comes first.

Photos from 3rd Anniversary in Honduras

The kids always insist they want to watch a movie.
They sit like this for about 10 minutes
then end up playing outside.

Erika and baby Marjory, Ana, Fany and Carol

Marjory likes catrachas

A catracha is a deep fried tortilla with refried beans and Honduran cheese
It's delicious!

Lounging on the grass

David and me

Of course Jetty joined us

Marjory loved playing on the grass

Samuel and Mauricio - proud owners of a store

Isa playing jump rope

Boys taking over the picture

Samuel is a cat lover.

A game of Chutes and Ladders

Samuel and Isa live on steep hill
so being able to roll in the grass extra fun.

Laura was excited about eating on the blanket

Big girls

Samuel and Laura are buddies

Fany

Fany, Isa and me, Erika and Marjory, Ana

Jired is not grumpy, he's just sucked up in the wi-fi

Beautiful Laura

Isa and me

Faithful friend, Ana

Bestie - Fany

"Doing life" with Erika

We make quite a crew!