Lourdes' Birthday

Lourdes with her surprise birthday cake

Lourdes and me!

Today we celebrated Lourdes' birthday.  At the Breakfast Program the kids and parents brought her very thoughtful gifts.  The kids came with the beautifully decorated cards for her full of prayer and blessings for Lourdes and her family.  In the afternoon her discipleship group, Don Juan and I surprised Lourdes with a cake.  She loved it!  She said she loves surprises.  I think it was a very special day for Lourdes, full of hugs and love.

In the evening I was invited to join the family for a birthday dinner.  It is also Lourde's son, Aaron's birthday. We enjoyed a nice meal, had a lot of laughs, Aaron chose turtle cheesecake and the servers all sang a very energetic birthday song to Lourdes and Aaron.  It was a wonderful day.

New Phase

It has been weeks since I have written anything.  My Mom has said for years that she can tell how I am doing because when things get me down I don't call her as often.  I guess I don't blog either.

In the case of my blog, I have been given feedback in the past that if I have a bad day I should keep it to myself because people might lose faith in me, or might even think that I am leaving Honduras.

Let me be clear.  I am not leaving Honduras.  God has called me here.  That calling has not wavered at all.  The Breakfast Program is growing in leaps and bounds.  For more than 8 months I have been EXTREMELY happy here.  I know that I can be happy again.  I am just struggling for the moment.

When I worked with teen aged boys in a lock down facility in Utah, sometimes we would get a new boy who was so perfect we would wonder why he was there.  All the staff would wonder what we would see in him when his "Honeymoon period" was over, and he showed his true colors.  For every boy, eventually, the honeymoon would end and we would start to see things they had not shown us before.  At that point we were finally able to work with them, help them, understand them, and treat the problems that put them in a lock down facility.

I think I am in a similar situation.  My honeymoon period here is over.  Little things that I had never noticed before started to bother me.  Then I noticed bigger things.  At that point I reached out to friends, family and my church for prayer.  Eventually it built up to a point where I was really shut down and decided I didn't want to trust anyone or talk to anyone.  I am grateful that quickly I realized that was not healthy and only hurt me more.

Two Mondays ago I sat down with Jairo and explained how I was feeling and why.  He listened earnestly.  He pointed out which things I would have to learn to deal with, giving me ideas of how I can handle them better.  He acknowledged where mistakes had been made by others and even apologized for some of those things.  He assured me that I am wanted and well like here.  He also let me know where my own insecurities were causing me to misinterpret things.  Afterward I felt much better, and with time things have definitely improved.

There have been a few incidents that caused me to slide back into mistrust, but Jairo and Lourdes have lifted me up and supported me through those times.  Thank God for them, and for the friends and family who have been praying for me.

To summarize, I have learned that most missionaries at the six month point begin to struggle.  I am no different.  Things are not so shiny and new anymore.  I don't find joy in the simple things as often as I used to.   Everything doesn't feel like such an amazing adventure.  I have been assured by other missionaries that this is completely normal.  I do not like the new attitude I see in myself and am working to be more grateful and joyful.

This weekend I will move to my new home in the mountains.  I have made a new friend in the past week and shared quality time with old friends.  I think I am at a turning point and things will get better from here.

Several people have quoted Jeremiah 29:11-13 to me.  "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."  Today while Lourdes, Jairo, Eunice and I were talking in the kitchen, Jairo gave me a hug and told me that I am going to be surprised by the amazing things God has in store for me.  Jairo said God has really BIG things for me.  I just need to wait.  He always has a sense about these things.

So I am holding on.  The honeymoon period is over.  Every day is not perfect anymore.  I can't expect it to be.  I hope that you will support me in prayer and understand that I am human.  I don't like to disappoint people, so this was hard for me to share.  But I fully believe that God DOES have good things in store for me and I will find them if I continue on His path.

Thank you for your understanding and grace.  I hope you will continue to walk with me as this new phase begins and I settle into REAL LIFE in Honduras.  I have been told by a good source that I will be surprised by big and amazing things that God has in store for me.  Can't wait to share them with you!

Sleeping

Today as I climbed into the van Lourdes asked, "How are you feeling?"  I told her I am not sure because I overslept and just woke up.

On the way to the church I clarified with Jairo that I am excited to go for pizza at the Italian place.  He had a big smile and did not seem upset by my behavior yesterday.  (I had worried about it all night last night and prayed about the conversation over and over.)

As I got out of the van I realized I was tired.  In the kitchen everything was prepared.  I sat down, leaned my head against the wall and almost fell asleep.  Jairo came in about an hour later.  It is not normal for me to be sitting there, so he told me that he would take me home.  I asked if he was leaving the church for something.  He said no, but he will take me home.  I reminded him that the conversational English class is today.  He said that is not important.  I should go home and go to bed.

Then one of the students who is most dedicated to the class called and said she is unable to attend.  I took that as a sign and asked Jairo if he could still take me home.  He said sure.  I got home at 11 a.m., put on my pajamas, and slept until 3 p.m.  My fever is gone, I just have some chest congestion and no appetite.  But I am so tired!

Tomorrow will be a long day with my birthday dinner in the evening.  Thursday is going to be VERY long.  We are serving the kids as normal for the Breakfast Program, then having a fancy dinner for Thanksgiving dinner.

Lourdes handed out invitations today.  Josselyn made them.  They are great!  They have pictures of Pat and a turkey.  Unfortunately, we can't afford turkey.  But our Thanksgiving will be special no matter what we eat.

The kids have been told they have to be dressed up.  A three year old boy went home yesterday and told his mother that he needs to wear a dress to the church on Thursday for dinner.  The Mom came in today to clarify.  Lourdes told the kids to dress in their best clothes - dresses for the girls if they have them, but they do not have to go buy a dress.  She had to tell one of the girls to come bathed with her hair combed.

We will set up the room upstairs with table clothes and make the room beautiful.  The kids are going to be amazed.

I hope I feel better for the big days ahead!  I already missed out on two parties.  I want to feel my best for these days to come.  But for now, I will drink some juice and go back to sleep.

Preparing for Thanksgiving

Today on the way to the breakfast program Jairo asked if my birthday is tomorrow or Wednesday.  I told him Wednesday.  He asked if I would like to go out for pizza for my birthday.  Three things went through my head all at once.

1)  Pizza?  I haven't been able to eat since Friday.

2) The last two families I know who ate pizza here got food poisening.

3)  Hot dogs.

Only the women who were in Honduras on my first trip here know why I think of hot dogs when someone mentions pizza in Honduras.  My only personal experience of pizza in Honduras was in 2008 when a team from my church took a group of girls out for pizza at Pizza Hut.  There were vienna sausages in the crust.  I'm not much of a meat eater.  It was very strange.

Jairo could tell that I wasn't jumping at the thought of going out for pizza for my birthday because I am terrible and horrible at keeping my thoughts in my mind.  They always go straight to my face.  Jairo said, "Oh, you don't want pizza."  He seemed disappointed and I didn't know what to do.

I said, "I am thinking of hot dogs."  (And food poisening and the fact that I can't imagine eating any food right now.  I didn't say that.)  Lourdes said she had no recollection of any hot dogs in the crusts at Pizza Hut, but I swear they were there!

Jairo said we are not going to Pizza Hut, we are going to a real Italian place that has the best pizza in the city.  I did my absolute best to convince him that I do really want to go out for pizza (especially at an Italian restaurant!) for my birthday.  I don't think he ever really believed me.  Now I feel horrible.  Obviously they put some thought into this idea and I did not react the way I should have.

At the Breakfast Program Lourdes worked with the kids while I took care of the kitchen.  Marlin was at the dentist so I was alone.  Lourdes is organizing a Thanksgiving dinner for Thursday.  She explained that only the kids who come regularly are invited.  She told kids who were just visiting for the day, or whom we rarely see, that they are welcome to attend the Christmas party if they attend regularly until Christmas.

We came up with a list of 81 kids so far who are invited to our Thanksgiving dinner.  K2, my church in Salt Lake, made a donation to be used in the name of Pat Pike, a memeber of K2 who was very sick.  The kids here spent weeks and weeks praying for his recovery.  Lourdes decided it would be a good idea to give thanks to God for Pat's life.  So we are having a Honduran Thanksgiving for the kids of the breakfast program.  (If anyone else would like to donate to give the kids a Thanksgiving dinner, please contact me at mlfager@hotmail.com.)

I fed 67 kids, cleaned the kitchen, and helped with English homework.  Then headed home.

When I got home a strange surprised awaited me.  Pieces of chocolate chip cookies were all over the floor.  I asked the cat if she ate the cookies, but she didn't answer.  So far she doesn't seem sick.  I have no idea why tiny bits of cookies were in the kitchen and dining room.  She has never eaten "people food" before, and she had a dish full of cat food, so this is odd.  I swept and mopped the floor.  Then I wanted to wash my sheets.  Last night I was still pretty sick.  I had a fever and chills so I wanted to clean my germy, sweaty sheets.  I am hoping tonight will be better.

There was hardly any water left by the time I finished washing.  I had to steal water from Fany's pila, carrying it in buckets and dumping it into my washing machine.  Then I made a bowl of soup and put the last few drips of water inside to let it soak.  So far the soup is sitting well in my stomach.  I should be ready for pizza by Wednesday, if the offer still stands.

Sick :(

Saturday morning I woke up feeling yucky.  At first I thought I was in a bad mood so I went through a mental checklist of why I didn't feel right.  Was I sad?  Angry?  I prayed and thought, but came up empty.

My weekly trip to the supermarket was a few hours later.  As I walked through the store I realized I was sick.  My whole body ached.  I felt exhausted.

I came home and put away the groceries, then walked down to the pulperia.  They are so good to me there.  I stocked up on juice and ginger ale.  They recommended day time and night time meds with strict instructions about how to take them.

I went home and slept, hoping to feel better when I got up.  Sunday there were two parties I was scheduled to attend.  I had to make desert for a Thanksgiving party and a cake for Laura's first birthday.

When I woke up Saturday evening, I started baking.  You know you're sick when you stir three strokes, then are so out of breath you have to stop and put your head between your knees so you don't pass out.  Once everything was baked and stored away safely I went back to bed.

This morning I woke up still feeling sick.  I got up and showered, thinking I might feel better.  But I was still weak and not feeling well, so I checked in with both parties and told them I couldn't attend.  Turns out Laura has the same exact thing I have.  Poor little birthday girl!

I decided to put fresh sheets on the bed, but as I did, my cat started going nuts smelling them.  There was a faint smell of cat urine on the top sheet.  I probably wouldn't have noticed it, but Jetty sure did.  All I can think is that one of the strays sprayed it while it was hanging on the line outside.  That meant another load of laundry needed to be done before I could go back to bed, but I got it done and spent today in bed too.

Can't believe I missed two parties!  But it is now Sunday evening and I think I am feeling better.  At least I didn't have to miss any days at the Breakfast Program and mentally I am feeling good.  Joss has had the same bug for over a week.  Aaron has been sick with it for a week.  Jairo got it Friday.  One of the students from my English class got it Friday as well.  Let me tell you, it was no fun.  I am hoping that my weekend of rest helps me heal more quickly.

We had 83 kids Friday at the Breakfast Program Friday and expect at least as many tomorrow!

Boys' line for hand washing

It's Raining Ants

My ceiling tiles are now duct taped together.  Why would a person need to duct tape their ceiling tiles you ask?  Well, let me tell you...

It all started when I first moved to Honduras.  Ants seem to have seasons here.  Sometimes they are black ants, like we have in the US.  Then there were a few months where tiny ants liked certain parts of my walls.  Yesterday I noticed huge almost translucent ants.  As I came home tonight there was one on the doorstep and I thought, "This must be the season of white ants."  The ants have been annoying, but not a real problem except for the time that the leaf cutter ants had a trail across my front door.  But that is a story for another time.

Earlier tonight I reached for a drink on my nightstand.  Inside were two ants.  As I looked closer I noticed the nightstand was covered with ants.  I pulled it out from the wall and there were ants everywhere.  Some were carrying larvae!  At first I thought I must have left some food somewhere.  I searched for the source.  No ants in the drawers of the nightstand but suddenly there is an ant in my hair.  Then another.  The ants were falling from the ceiling!

I looked up to see ants crawling out from a loose tile.  It was 8:45 pm.  I looked outside and saw that Santos and Fany were at home so I called.  Santos answered, "Hello Mary Lynn."

"Hi Santos.  I have a problem.  Ants are falling from my chest (Oops!  'pecho' = chest, 'techo' = roof) every two seconds!"  I said.

He didn't laugh, but said he would be right over.  He and Fany came quickly.  Meanwhile I had moved the bed from under the "leak" in the roof and was spraying everything in sight with ant spray.  Fany had me keep Laura in the kitchen away from the fumes while she and Santos tried to figure out what was going on.  Santos told me they don't bite.  That didn't make me feel much better.

Santos pulled down the ceiling tile where the ants were crawling out.  I couldn't look.  I was imagining something up there like a bee hive full of ants.  He grabbed my headlamp, climbed up a ladder and looked around but found nothing.  He took the spray and sprayed everything up there.

Then he tried to put the ceiling tile back.  It was broken before he took it off, so it didn't attach tightly.  We had swept three times and mopped once, but ants kept appearing.  He got nails and screws, but nothing worked.  Finally I said, "Paint (pinta), I mean tape (cinta) !!!  He looked at me a little strangely but when I came back with duct tape he got the point.  We taped the heck out of the ceiling.  Fany and I joked that we would tell people it is the new style, to have stripes of duct tape on your ceiling.  Then she said we can paint it all white and nobody will know.

Meanwhile Laura was laughing the whole time.  Laura will turn one year old on Sunday.  She has a gift for laughing the funniest laugh in tense situations.  To me, having ants falling on my bed at 9 pm, was a tense situation.

Santos ultimately determined that the ants were coming in through the roof, falling onto the ceiling, and then crawling through the cracked tile to visit me.  Good luck getting through the duct tape, ants!

I changed my bedding and cleaned the bedroom from top to bottom.  Hopefully I won't have nightmares of translucent ants falling on my head tonight.  It will be a good story to tell Lourdes and Jairo tomorrow.  I'm sure Jairo will get a laugh out of it.  Maybe by then I will laugh be able to laugh about it too.  At this point all I can think of is Thank God for Santos and Fany!

Conversations

Many times when something interesting or new happens, I think to myself "I have to remember to share this in my blog tonight."  Usually I forget.  But here are two things I remember from today:

When I was in the US, people teased me about my Spanish, saying that I spoke Spanish with a strong English accent.  One of the men from the church here always compliments me on my Spanish.  He seems very genuine and always says he loves my accent.  I find that hard to believe, after being teased all those years.  Tonight we had a conversation about it.  He asked how I learned Spanish with such a great accent.  Jose, Karla and I laughed because I always tell people that I learned my Spanish from Karla - the fastest speaker in the world.  When we told Alexis that I got my accent from Karla he said that made sense because we both express ourselves the same way.  We both are expressive and use a lot of emphasis when we speak.

Later, he was telling Lourdes about great my accent.  He said my accent was "bonito" (nice/pretty) but I misheard him and thought he said "unico" (unique).  I laughed and said, "Unique that's one word for it!"

I guess it's not as funny now but it seemed really funny then.

On the way home from the birthday party I rode with Karla and Jose.  Their daughter, Dana Sophia, complained she was hungry.  They asked why she didn't eat at the party since there was a bounty of food.  She said she didn't like any of the food.  (Really she had filled up on chips.)  It was funny, and sad, listening to their conversation.  I was raised being told that I should finish my dinner because there were starving children in China.  Then the next generation was told about starving children in Africa.  In Honduras it is different.

Karla asked Dana if Dana remembered the boy outside the grocery store who was eating cabbage.  Karla explained that the boy was eating leaves of cabbage because he has no food.  Karla asked Dana if Dana believed that the boy likes to eat raw cabbage.  Karla told Dana that she has the opportunity to eat plenty of good food, and if she chooses not to then she cannot complain because there are children at the grocery store who are starving and have no food.

China was abstract to me.  It was hard to comprehend.  I'm sure Africa was intangible to the next generation.  But in Honduras, for Dana Sophia, she sees starving kids when she goes to the grocery store.  Wow.  Life is different here.

Jairo's Birthday!

Tonight we celebrated Jairo's birthday

Joss, Marcella and me

Everything was set up outside

All of the meat was cooked on Jairo's new birthday grill

Jairo with Aaron and Joss

Jairo looks great in Lourdes' glasses.  This may be his new FB profile pic!

Me with Lourdes

Finally, after years of waiting I get to spend this special day in Honduras with Jairo!

Valery got the whole crowd dancing by the end of the night

A day at the mall

Today I had to go shopping to pick up a birthday gift for Jairo.  I had been thinking and thinking about what to get him.  Finally I thought of a great idea.  Jairo loves photos.  He likes to take photos, he likes to look at photos.  He often asks me to take photos of things for him, but until this point he has never used any of the photos he asked me to take.  He uses photos in PowerPoint productions that he makes when he speaks at conferences, etc.  Last week he told me he is using the same photos over and over and they are not recent.

That gave me an idea.  I decided to buy a USB for his birthday.  On the USB I will put any photo that I think he would like as well as all those he asked me to take.

My taxista dropped me off at the mall yesterday at 1:30 and picked me up at 4:30.  I had a fun little outing.  First I wandered into a fancy perfume and make up store.  Even my friends who don't have much are always talking about fancy perfume.  They say they have it at home, but they must save it for special occasions because I've never smelled them wearing it.

I have been thinking about wearing foundation.  Most women here wear full makeup.  I haven't worn anything but eyeshadow in my life and I got over that phase in 9th grade.  The lady at the counter asked if she could help me.  I told her I am trying to find the right color for foundation.  She had me wash my face, then she put three different lotions on me (apparently I am in bad shape).  Then she put on the foundation.  It looked okay, but didn't cover as well as I was expecting so I asked about concealer.  She put concealer under one eye and let me compare with the other.  Well, the eye with no concealer did have darker circles, but the eye with concealer looked grey underneath!  She told me how marvelous the products are and what they will do for my skin.  Then I saw the price.  The foundation was over $80 and concealer was almost $50!  She said I could use something cheaper like Lancome, but you get what you pay for.  When she saw my face, she told me that the three lotions were REALLY expensive.  I can't even imagine.

As the makeup settled in over the day, it did look more natural.  But not $130 worth.  And my face kept getting little itches.  By the time I left the mall I had probably itched off most of the makeup.  I went home and washed my face.  I don't think foundation is for me.

I did find a great deal on a USB, a teddy bear from Laura who will turn one soon, a card for Karla who also has a birthday coming up, and a file folder to keep all of my receipts in for taxes.  I also found chocolate frosting at the grocery store, along with sugar free pudding.  I am going to make Chocolate Eclairs for Jairo's birthday.  I figure that is better for his diabetes than cake.

Got a bunch of laundry done.  Had to do an extra load because a spider or something built a webby nest on my sheet while it was drying.  I washed the sheet again and then a bird pooped on it as it was drying the second time - a big, dark, poop on my pink sheet.  :(   I am really enjoying my new blankets.  I only need a few more long sleeved top and I'll be set for colder weather.  I tried finding some comfy every day shoes at Payless since I can't wear flip flops anymore, but they were $30.  I decided to wait until I get back to the states at Christmas and pick up some cheaper shoes and some slippers for the cold tile floors of my house at Ross or TJ Maxx.

Misael's Birthday!

Today was Misa's birthday.  In Honduras people go out and buy fancy cakes.  Not all as fancy as the one I posted of Josselyn's birthday, but cakes here are purchased, not homemade.  Marlin, Misael's mother, bought a gorgeous cake for her daughter's birthday and brought it to the Breakfast Program for a party.  However, I knew that funds were low in their house this week so I offered to make a cake.  I wasn't even sure she would want a homemade cake, but Marlin was very grateful.  Lourdes asked me to make two just to be sure there was enough to go around.

I searched in 3 stores and couldn't find food coloring so we used Coco Krispies
to write Happy Birthday.

Misael greeted everyone with an extra bright smile.  When we wished him Happy Birthday he responded softly, "Grashias".  He was definitely excited to turn four.

Misael and his mother, my friend Marlin.

Since it was his birthday Misael was allowed some special liberties, like lying on the kitchen floor when the birthday wishes became overwhelming.

And he took some pictures with my camera, which is normally off limits.

Lourdes wasn't there for the first group, so we decided to wait to have the cake until she got there.  By that point we only needed one cake which was good because Marlin took the other one home to celebrate in the evening with her family.

We had a difficult time lighting the candles.  It was a windy day.  But finally they were lit and we sang Happy Birthday in English to him!  In Honduras you always clap when you sing Happy Birthday.

Then he blew out the candles.

 

 

And enjoyed his piece of cake.

Happy Birthday Misael!

A morning of shopping with the ladies!

Today I went with Veronica, my friend from church, and her sister to La Kennedy!!!! We went to a ton of used clothes places.  We were in search of a gift for Misael's birthday tomorrow, long sleeved shirts and heavy, thick blankets for me.  It was fun shopping with the girls :)  I felt safe.  I was carrying a significant amount of money, so I was very conscientious.  Veronica reminded me to carry a little bit of money in each front pocket.

I really enjoyed time out with the girls, shopping and feeling like a normal woman.  I think I will probably go back there again in the future.  Maybe with Lourdes.  It was fun!  I have been getting to know Veronica better lately.  I have always liked her, but never really had the opportunity to spend time with her.  Last week we hung out at the pool together.  This week she suggested that she take me shopping for the blankets.  She is really nice.  She works as a hairdresser and has two daughters, one eight years old and one a year old.

This afternoon I saw Dr Gustavo.  It was a long wait because a lot of people are sick.  Both Yareli and Estephany are not feeling well.  I figured they should go first since they were waiting in the cold.  Dr.  Gustavo said there is absolutely nothing wrong with my blood work.  It is so slightly outside of the normal range that it is not a problem.  I asked if any of the blood work might show why my hair is falling out.  He said no, he believes it is stress.  I believe he is right.  That was a hard one to accept.  I prefer to think of myself as someone who is laid back and relaxed.  But in reality I do have a tendency to be anxious as much as I hate to admit it.

I really do have more peace and happiness here than I have ever had in my life.  But I guess I still need to find more ways to be "tranquila".  Hopefully that will help with my hair loss.  Today Marlin and Clara were looking at my drivers license.  It finally happened.  They said that my hair looks significantly different than it used to.  I've been waiting for someone to say it out loud to me.  It didn't hurt as much as I expected.  I know they were not saying anything to be hurtful. 

Clara got her first chemotherapy today.  She came to the church afterward.  At first she was fine.  Then she got tired and said she felt nauseous.  She returned home after a few hours stating that she did not feel well.

I baked two cakes after I got home this evening.  Tomorrow there are a ton of birthdays at the church.  One is Misael's.  Marlin bought a cake for her daughter a few months ago, but money has been very tight so I offered to help out for her son.  Lourdes suggested it would be best to make 2 cakes in order for there to be enough.  I borrowed a cake pan from Fany and cooked them one at a time in my tiny little oven.  Saturday I will bake another for Jairo.  I'm thinking of making eclairs too since he prefers less sweet deserts.  Next week I'll make a cake for Dana Sophia, the following week I'll make one for myself and Karla.  I am now the church's pastry chef.  I have been searching all over for a trifle bowl so I can change it up a little.

Washed both of my new blankets tonight.  It is so cold!  I am excited to have my new blankets on the bed.  I got two comforters (used) in La Kennedy today for only $13 each.  We searched all over but finally found them just as we had given up.  I also got some used flannel pjs for $1.50 and two long sleeved shirts for $1 each.  They were both name brand shirts that look almost new.  Some people think I'm nuts to buy comforters used, but I think if I wash them and leave them in the sun, any "cooties" they may carry should be gone.  I don't have the money to buy a new comforter.  The ladies from Los Pinos encouraged me to buy two because when I am washing one, I will need the other.  They know best!  In this colder weather it takes a lot longer for things to dry.

I am going to take some time to rest, relax and read before bed.  Buenas Noches!

Honduras is good for my soul

Preschool class was great today!  There were only 10 kids.  We had less kids at the Breakfast Program overall this morning, so the class was smaller.

When I got to the church this morning Marlin was making oatmeal.  She was also cleaning out the shelves.  She told me "I cannot clean these shelves and stir the oatmeal at the same time."  She asked me to stir the oatmeal.  I love it when she designates things like that.  It's such a big change from when she used to be so shy and passive.

In preschool I prepared papers for each child.  We've been working on recognizing letters and
the sounds they make.  I wrote the child's name at the top, then put lines underneath for them to practice writing the first letter of their name.  The three year olds got to trace their letter.  Two of the boys can write their entire names on their own.  Then we talked about things that begin with the same letter as their first name.  Each child drew pictures of the things that start with the same letter.  Their work turned out great, so I asked Lourdes to come into the class to "oooou" and "ahhhhh" over their papers.  She had them applaud the younger kids and praised the older kids for their great work.

Jose wore his pajamas today.

I have new helpers lately.  They are boys.  I like having them help with the class.  They are good with the kids, not too bossy, but still on top of things.  They choose to help with the class over playing fútbol!  Male/female roles can be strictly defined here, so I love that the boys want to help be teachers.  Friday will be our day to play!  We've been working hard this week.  The kids are already planning which toys they want to use on Friday.

After everyone was fed, I talked to Lourdes about getting my blood test results.  She recommended that I call the taxista since I had several errands to run.  I got my blood tests, stopped and picked up a prescription, went to a used clothes store and bought an Eddie Bauer cardigan in perfect shape for 100 lempiras, which equals $5.  I want to go back there and really look through everything for some long sleeved shirts.  When I have my own car... 

Last night I was wishing that houses here had heat.  It was chilly.  It's going to get colder.  When I move to the mountains it will be even colder.  My taxista suggested that I buy a space heater.

The pharmacy near the clinic did not have the medicine I needed.  We had to drive around to find a
different pharmacy so I got to see a part of town I've never been to before.  It is a lot of streets filled with fruit and vegetable stands and used clothing stores on both sides of the road.  I wish I could walk around and shop there.  I asked the taxista the name of this area.  It is called The Kennedy.  I hear the ladies from Los Pinos talk about it all of the time.  It is where they shop and sell their wares if they are business ladies.  When I told the taxista I had never been there before he said that is because it is dangerous.  I asked if it was as dangerous as Los Pinos.  He said a little less dangerous than Los Pinos, but still very dangerous because Los Pinos is very, very dangerous.

I got home early and did a load of wash.  It was a lot of  jeans.  Jeans take a long time to dry.  It started to sprinkle before I was finished washing so I was not hopeful that the jeans would dry.  However, it is now close to bedtime and most of the clothes are close to dry.  I am not used to having to think about so many things - like how will I have clean pants to wear tomorrow.

I am trying to enjoy my last few weeks in my little house in the city.  This has been a wonderful place for me.  I felt at home here from the very first moment I saw the house.  I will miss this place when I move to the mountains.  I will miss Fany, Santos and Laura too.  I really like my home here.  I hope the mountains are as good to me.  It think they will be.

My blood test results were not quite normal.  Tomorrow at 2 pm a doctor from the church will look at them.  I tried to figure out what the results meant by googling things on the internet, but I couldn't make any sense of it.  I don't think they show why my hair is falling out.  At first I was very anxious about having the blood work be abnormal.  I started imagining that I might have to go back to the US for treatment.  You know, thinking of worst case circumstances.  I took a quick nap and woke up with peace.  I am sure that Dr Gustavo will tell me what is wrong, or maybe nothing is wrong at all.  The dermatologist wants to see me in 5 weeks for my hair.  She warned me not to expect any progress for the first month or two.  I do hope I see progress soon.

We are having a birthday party for Jairo on Sunday.  I have to do some errands on Saturday to prepare.  I am going to make his birthday cake.  My taxista already agreed to help me run errands on Saturday.

Tonight I have a strange sense of peace.  Despite the jeans on the line and the fact that it is likely to rain before they dry.  Despite the results of my blood tests, I feel peaceful and grateful to be here.  Life in Honduras is good for my soul.

Blood work in the dark

This morning Lourdes and I walked down into central Los Pinos.  We got a collectivo - a cab that waits until they have a full load all going in the same direction.  Then we headed out so I could get blood work done at a local lab.  I almost couldn't get it.  The credit card machine didn't work and it was really expensive.  We pitched in together and still didn't have enough to pay.  Thankfully, the man let us pay all the money we had and we will pay the rest tomorrow when we go back to get the results.  My hair is falling out by the handful and has been since August 3rd.  I barely have a pony tail left.  When I went to the dermatologist 3 weeks ago she gave me some meds, told me to get blood work and come back in two months.  At this point I am almost hoping that something shows up in the blood work so I can understand why my hair has been falling out for three months.  It's frustrating!

Not only was there no phone line for the credit card machine, there was no light in the lab.  The man pulled a chair up to a window, but then had me sit so that my head shaded my arm where he was about to stick me.  I couldn't look.  He took 3 big tubes with no trouble.  He must be a pro.

We returned in time for preschool class.  There were 17 kids today.  Some were tiny.  Since the older kids have sex ed class on Tuesdays with a psychologist, I had no help.  It was controlled chaos, but we made it.  Two little ones fell out of their chairs.  Drinks were spilled.  The floor was covered with rice.  But the kids identified words that start with A-F, read a book, prayed, and filled their bellies, so I guess it was a good day.

I had to hang around for a while, waiting for the conversational Spanish class I am leading.  I love that class.  Today they made such great progress!  We worked on pronunciation.  So strange to think that it is difficult for people to make sounds that seem so common to us.  "CH" as in "chew", "TH" as in "they", and "Y" as in "Yes" seem to be exceptionally hard.  At the beginning they literally could not make those sounds.  By the end they were perfect.  I told the students that soon they will be speaking just like Gringos.

Lourdes is still feeling very tired.  She said she had a hard time getting out of bed this morning.  She left early today.

Tomorrow I will get the blood tests back and go see Dr Gustavo to see what he has to say.

Jairo has been doing a lot of counseling lately.  He was eager to go home and rest tonight.  He never complains.  But tonight he said that the past two days have been long and difficult for him.

I watched as much of the election results as I could stand while I ate dinner.  Some of the "experts" who were speaking were so ignorant I couldn't stand to watch for very long.  I turned it off long before results were in.

Called my Mom.  Her cousin just got electricity back today.  Mom said many people on the East Coast are still without power.  It's cold there.  This is a long time to go with no power.

My friend Jody bought a new house today in Salt Lake.  I'm excited for her!  Congrats Jody!!

"Thanks God" for Marlin and Don Juan

Today felt good.  I slept well, got the garbage out in time (7 a.m.) and had a relaxing day at the Breakfast Program.

Marlin and I were a team again.  Lourdes is not feeling well.  We have it down to a science now.  Bismar is back from his private school in Olancho.  He comes to the church early every day to help  Today he and Marlin were mixing the pancakes when I arrived.

Marlin and Bismar making panqueques.

Since they had everything under control I tried to keep myself busy with other things.  Unfortunately the only thing I could see to do was clean out the garbage can.  I really didn't want to do it.  It was sticky and grungy.  I knew it would be a dirty job.  Then I started thinking about all that Marlin does every day.  She is never afraid of dirty work.  She is always the first one to take initiative when she sees something that needs to be done, no matter what the job is.  I have to admit, I did take some time to think about it, but soon I got to work on the garbage can.  In the end it was actually easy.  I was glad I did it.

Eunice joked with me that I am becoming a professional dish washer.  She asked if I washed dishes often in the US.  I told her I had a dish washing machine for the majority of my life.  She joked that I am putting in my time now - washing dishes at the Breakfast Program.

I pitch in with the dishes a lot because cooking here is different.  I feel more comfortable washing dishes than cooking Honduran style.  I help with cooking, but I always need instructions.  My friends in the US would tell you I am a good cook.  But in Honduras even the basic fundamentals are different.  For example, in Honduras scrambled eggs are always literally deep fried in oil, but margarine is used to keep pancakes from sticking to the flat top grill.  Salt and sugar are added to almost everything - things you would never imagine.  Therefore, it is best if Marlin does things her way.  She has the magic touch in the kitchen.  Everything she cooks is delicious.  I don't mind at all taking instructions from her.  The good news is, she is finally comfortable telling me what to do.  She used to be uncomfortable giving orders.

Today we fed close to 70 kids.  They were all very well behaved and had a great time.

Afterward I played checkers (with a chess set) with Misael and Maylen.  Marlin is taking classes on Saturdays so she was busy doing homework for her class.  I was happy to keep the kids occupied, although they really do a fine job of entertaining themselves on their own.

I talked with Marlin about going to the used clothing store one day.  Because I am a gringa, I am limited as to what I can do.  Especially in the neighborhood where the church is.  Marlin doesn't quite understand.  She invites me to make tamales at her house but when I talk about the logistics with her, she wants me to meet my cab on a corner where a member of the church was recently shot and killed.  I know Jairo would never let me meet the taxista on that corner.  It's a touchy subject because I don't want her to think that I don't want to visit her, or that I am not comfortable in her neighborhood.  The fact is that it is not very safe in daylight hours.  After dark I cannot be there.

We tried to figure out a way to do some shopping at the used clothing store.  Jairo was in a counseling session, but Don Juan offered to take us under the condition that I wear a baseball cap to cover my hair so I look less gringa.  He was serious.  In the end we decided I shouldn't go unless we clear it with Jairo first.  I don't want Jairo to think that I would go wander around Los Pinos on my own.  But I did believe he would allow me to go with Don Juan.

On the way home from the church I asked Jairo if I could go to the used clothing store on another day.  He said that as long as I am willing to take Don Juan's hand if something bad happens, then I can go.  I told him that is fine with me.  He also got a good laugh over Don Juan insisting on the baseball cap.  He offered to stop at the used clothing store on the way home, but it was late and I knew everyone wanted to go home, so I said thank you but another day would be better.  (I need to get some warmer clothes.  It is getting cold down here!)

Today I learned that Don Juan's siblings all work in the US.  He said he would like to move to the US and could do so legally.  In fact his siblings set up a job for him making good money in the US, but he told them he could not leave the church.  The man who works seven days/week, for 12 hours (or more) each day, turned down a job making more money in the US because he can't leave the church.  I don't know what we would do without him.  Apparently he realizes his value here and that is why he can't leave.

Don Juan is the definition of a "Jack of all trades".  He is a guard, plumber, electrician, coffee maker, grocery shopper, errand runner, head of construction, fixer of all things broken, artist, disciplinarian, and caregiver.  He is no longer the bather of Lorenzo because Lorenzo now takes showers on his own, with some verbal encouragement.  Don Juan knows which kids in the Breakfast Program need new shoes, who has food in their house, whose parents are struggling or absent.  He doesn't even live in the neighborhood, but he somehow knows everything about the kids.  He knows names of kids who show up randomly and how everyone is related.  He is not only Iglesia en Transformación's guard.  He is the church's guardian angel.  That is not an exaggeration.  As they say in Honduras "Thanks God" that Don Juan did not move to the US.

I will be happy to report to Lourdes that we had a fourth day with zero complications despite her absence at the Breakfast Program.  She can stay home whenever she needs to and everything runs smoothly.  It is not the same, but it is still good.

A Day of Rest

In the US I used to spend days alone in my house.  It is my way of re-centering.  I never felt bad about it.  For some reason since I moved here, if I don't get out and do at least one constructive thing outside my home each day, I feel like the day was wasted.  I need to get over that.

Today my one productive thing was to go for a little walk, pay the light bill and search out some local fruit and veggies.  I achieved all of the above.  For the first time I bought things from one of the music makers.  I call the people who walk down the street selling their wares "music makers" because sometimes my street is filled with music.  Today it was one man selling "peliculas" (movies) while another passed by with "aquacate, sandia, mandarina" and something else I can't remember right now.  I bought some avocadoes and mandarines from him.  (I didn't buy watermelon.)

Then he asked if I'm from Spain.  (Nice guy.  When I told him I'm from the US he asked if all of my family is safe from the hurricane.)  The guards at the front of my gated community asked if I'm from Spain, as have several others.  I don't know why.  I have never met a person from Spain in Honduras, but there seem to be plenty of gringos, so to me that would be the obvious assumption.  In May and June people kept asking if I was from Argentina.  Now Spain.

Ahhhh.  It just started to rain.  Now I have a good reason to stay in the house.  But I would prefer to feel like I didn't need a reason.


LATER-
Stopped raining.  Fany came by to say that Santos' car leaked a whole tank of feul onto to driveway, in case I smelled it.  She said she needed to go to the store, but now they have to walk bc of the hole in the gas tank.  I asked if I could go.

We put Laura in a stroller and headed out.  Fany was not thrilled when Santos ran with Laura in her stroller down the hill in the middle of the street.  So funny to me how some Daddies act like children when they have children of their own.  He adores that little girl and will do anything to make her smile.  She did love flying down the hill full speed.

On the way home a woman walking in front of us stepped out into the street to avoid a homeless man who was sitting in the middle of the sidewalk.  It was a one way street and there was no oncoming traffic, so she should have been fine, but right at that moment a man on a motorcycle came up behind her driving the wrong way up the street.  He hit her, pinning her foot between the curb and his tires, knocked her down into the road, and swerved away.  He did stop and come back.  She was crying in pain.

Fany and I felt horrible for the poor lady.  She didn't do anything unwise.  She had one foot barely in the street.  We didn't stick around to see the outcome.  I was glad I have been listening to Jairo and not walking to the store.  He won't mind if I am with Santos and Fany.  Bad things happen so quickly even when you don't do anything wrong.  Anyway, my day was not as uneventful as I originally said.

No more XYZ

Marlin and I teamed up and ran the Breakfast Program alone for the past three days.  I was so happy to be able to tell Lourdes that it went really well!  She worries when she is not there.

Today there were LOTS of kids!  I'm thinking around 70 in the first group alone.  There were so many kids they couldn't all fit at the tables.  Some had to eat in the prayer circle, which is usually not allowed, but today we had no choice.

One tiny one was trying to eat all by himself, but was getting more food on the table and the floor than in his mouth.  I ended up spoon feeding him.  With each bite he would raise his arms over his head, cheer and giggle!  Never saw a little one so excited to eat.  It was a fun experience.

Sometimes I feel anxious when Lourdes is gone.  I know all eyes are on me, watching how the kids will behave.  However, this week couldn't have gone better.  Maybe it was luck, or maybe the kids are getting used to me.  A few had to sit in the "castigado" chair, but none were suspended.  I think Lourdes would be proud.

I've stopped letting people know when the zipper on their pants is down.  Most times they are aware their zipper is down because they are wearing pants with a broken zipper.  No need for me to draw attention to it.  Have you ever had to wear pants with a broken zipper?  I haven't.

Winnie the Pooh? Really? Are you kidding me?

Today I sat down with the little ones for lunch.  Usually lunch conversations are about who is talking with their mouth full, or who is chewing with their mouth open.  Today the little ones were discussing much bigger things.

As I took a seat one of them asked me urgently, "Isn't Winnie to Pooh  diabolical, Mary Lynn!?!"  He seemed very sure of himself.  I was confused.  I asked the boy why Winnie the Pooh could be considered diabolical.  He told me he didn't know why, but he was sure that Winnie the Pooh is diabolical.  I didn't want any parents angry at me, so I just told him that I had never known Winnie the Pooh to be diabolical.

I asked two educated adults why the kids would believe that Winnie the Pooh is diabolical.  They said that "people say" Winnie the Pooh is gay.  I was so confused.  Winnie the Pooh is gay?  He is a bear!  Then I was told that Winnie the Pooh is gay with Christopher Robin.  Now maybe we have a problem here - if we were to believe that a boy were "having relations" with a bear, that could be a problem.

I told the adults that I think whoever has the sick mind to think of such a thing is the one who has problems.  Not Winnie the Pooh!  How sad that people have corrupted Winnie the Pooh for the children today.

PS:
Has anyone else heard of this?  I don't want to cause a debate.  I just wonder if this is a common rumor that I have somehow, until now, been lucky enough to escape.

Swimming with the ladies

Question:  Six Hondurans and one gringa go swimming.  The six Hondurans use sunblock (SPF 70) and the gringa uses none.  Who gets burned?

Answer:  Everyone but the gringa!

Yesterday Lourdes took all of the ladies in her discipleship group, plus Chayito (the therapist) and me to the club.  The ladies were so excited!  And also very nervous.  They had never been to a club before.  They had never been anywhere where they had to wear a bathing suit.  Lourdes and I came up with bathing suits for everyone.  We painted our nails to match our suits.  We planned and planned all week.  On Monday we prepared a list of things to bring.  One by one they admitted they had no towels, so we found towels for the ladies as well.  I guess they normally drip dry?  Some day when the time is right I will ask.

Tuesday morning we pulled into the church expecting the ladies to be ready and waiting.  Nobody was there!  Usually they are all very prompt.  I was surprised.  Finally, one by one, they came up the hill.  We climbed into the van and headed out.  We arrived to find the club empty, except for one man who was skimming the pool.  One of the ladies commented, "Look, he's getting our pool dirty."  We told her no, he is cleaning it.

We all changed into bathing suits.  There were some gasps when we walked into the bathroom.  It was very average to me - two bathroom stalls, three showers, beige tile, no warm water.  But to some it was very elaborate.  Everyone assured each other they looked beautiful in their bathing suits - and they really did.  Somehow I ended up bringing 4 bathing suits to Honduras.  God must have known that I would have to clothe some ladies from Los Pinos so they could go to a swimming pool.

Clara, Chayito, Jacki, Veronica, Marlin, Lourdes at the Club

I broke the ice and jumped right in, so I missed the conversation about who could swim and who could not.  Turned out only Marlin knows how to swim.  She is actually very good!  I don't know where she had the opportunity to become so comfortable in the water, but she is.  Lourdes and I taught everyone else how to kick and put their faces in the water.  Some were even doggy paddling.

Clara is out of the hospital and swimming!

We swam and played for hours in the water.  I was the first to get out!  I was chilly and needed some sunshine.  Josselyn and Jairo joined us for lunch.  We all chose to have a plato tipico - typical plate of Honduras.  It was enormous!  It was steak, two sausages, queso fresco (cheese), beans, tortillas, rice and salsa.  We sat in the sun eating, lounging and talking.  As the sun got too hot, we moved to the shade.  Everyone talked about how good it felt to relax.  Only Joss and I don't have kids, so they talked about not having to work, not having to care for the kids.  Lourdes made a rule that nobody could call home.  I don't think anyone even wanted to.

Here in Honduras, it is very rare that a woman takes time for herself to relax.  For the women of Los Pinos it is unheard of and thought to be selfish to think of themselves.  But we had prepped the ladies to honor themselves for the day.  It was nice to hear them say that they felt so relaxed because I know for a fact that even when they are "relaxing" in their beds at night, they are sleeping with their kids on lumpy mattresses or some sort of pad.  They don't have their own bedroom, or even their own bed.  I had a wonderful day, but I think I found as much pleasure in seeing my friends relax and enjoy themselves.

Veronica and me

After lunch we went for a walk and explored the rest of the club.  It is really very nice - an isolated oasis in the middle of the city.  There are several playgrounds and two different areas with tennis courts.  There are two fútbol fields, the pool, a sauna, jaccuzi, childrens' pool and a gigantic slide.  During our walk I saw a beautiful building at the top of a mountain.  I said I was going up there.  We didn't know if it was a house, or what.  Along the way Joss found the hugest slide I have ever seen.  She got a gleam in her eye and I thought to myself, "This is why I love this girl."  She maintains a perfect balance of pushing limits without ever going too far.  She is awesome!  Needless to say, soon everyone was following Joss's lead and screeching as we flew down the slide.  It was so fast and so high that I was afraid I was going to burn a hole in the shorts I had borrowed from Lourdes!  No joke.  My behind was hot!

This is the slide - it wouldn't even fit in the photo

After out hike, we were all hot again, so we hopped in the pool for one last swim.  I taught everyone how to play tag in the water.  Then they all (except Marlin) asked for diving lessons.  We ended the day by all lining up and diving in, one at a time, like synchronized swimmers over and over.  Jairo took videos of our fantastic diving.  Then Lourdes said it was time to go.  I laughed when I heard one mother say, "I don't want to get out yet!"

It was a marvelous day with many of my favorite people!  Lourdes was BRILLIANT to think of this as a treat for her disciples.

I will now be joining the discipleship group officially.  Lourdes said that the women are still new Christians, but for me it will be an opportunity to develop deeper relationships.  I am honored to be included in the group.


On Monday, Marlin and I were working in the kitchen.  Marlin took both of my hands and looked into my eyes.  She said, "I love you.  You know that, don't you?  You are the most special friend I have ever had.  You are caring and sweet.  You are a good friend to me."  I told her that she is very special to me, as well.  I reminded her about the first time we ever spoke - that I thought she was one of the kids of the Breakfast Program until she told me that two of the kids were hers.  I also told her that I thought it was very rare that she approached me because she is usually extremely shy.  She agreed that it was not typical for her to start a conversation with a stranger.  I told her that she was the first person to talk to me, and she has been wonderful to me ever since.

I try to imagine what Marlin's life is like when she leaves the Breakfast Program and goes back to her home in Los Pinos.  I know she doesn't have running water (or a towel).  I know she doesn't have a fridge.  Her two kids don't have their own bed.  Her life is nothing like the way I was raised.  But we are friends deep in our souls.  Our backgrounds don't matter.  We really don't even talk about them much, although we could if we wanted to.

Today Marlin invited me to her house to learn how to make tamales with her on Friday.  I told her I want to go, but I'm not sure how I would get home.  I will ask Jairo and talk to my taxi driver to figure it out.  She said we could do it Saturday if that makes it easier for me to be there.  I think Saturday will be better because I don't know any taxi driver who would pick me up in her neighborhood after dark.  Tamales take a long time, so if we start after the Breakfast Program on Friday we will be working long past dark.  I am really hoping to spend Saturday learning to make tamales with my friend Marlin.  What a beautiful opportunity to learn a new skill, spend time with my friend, and get to learn more about her life and her familiy!

Monday Jairo and I went to see the lawyer about my residency.  We had to pay the most significant part of the costs.  Jairo and I stopped at the bank and I got the money out of my account.  He started to hand me the huge wad of cash and I looked at him like, "You want me to carry that????"  I think he was testing me.  He laughed and asked if I wanted him to hold it.  I said yes, please!  We parked in a special parking lot this time, since we were carrying so much money.  This way we didn't have to walk through the streets carrying cash.  Lawyers here do not take checks or credit cards.

I like the lawyer who is dealing with my residency.  He is a friend of Jairo's.  He asked what I am doing in Honduras, so we told him about the Breakfast Program.  His wife is trying to start a similar program in his church, but so far they haven't been able to figure out how to serve anyone except on Sundays.  We invited them to visit the church any morning and see how we cook and serve all of the kids.  He was very impressed with what Iglesia en Transformación is doing through the Breakfast Program.  He also asked how I learned Spanish.  I told him through classes.  He said I must have learned in other ways because he has worked with gringos and most of them don't know what he is talking about.  Jairo told the attorney that he believes I have a special gift for language because I learn fast.  That made me feel really good.

Lourdes, Jairo and Walter all left today to go to Olancho.  They brought 5 boys with them to visit the six boys who are currently enrolled in the private Christian school there.  The five boys will take an entrance exam.  If they pass the exam we will begin looking for funding so that they can get out of Los Pinos and go away to school.  Lourdes picks only "the cream of the crop" to attend school at El Sembrador.  It is very expensive, so she wants to be sure they will be able to last away from home, in a new environment, with a LOT of structure.  I have been praying all day for those boys.  This is literally a day that will change their lives.  If they pass the exam and go to school at El Sembrador, they will have access to an entirely different path.

Marlin and I are running the Breakfast Program together.  We make a great team.  She cooks and I make sure to help when she needs it.  I work with the kids and she helps me when I need it.  Today she told me she needed help.  She said she needed me to ask the kids to wash their dishes and leave.  I started to bolt out the door to do as she asked.  She burst out laughing and said WAIT!  I was so eager to do as she asked, I hadn't given her time to finish telling me the rest of what she needed me to do.  :)  We both started laughing.  Marlin works harder at the Breakfast Program than any other person, but she used to be very timid.  Only in the past month she has found her own voice.  Now I find her solving arguments with the kids and making decisions on her own.  She never did that before, even a month ago.  She is also parenting her kids in a more decisive, consistent manner.  I like watching my friend reach her full potential.

My friend Marlin is learning not to be timid.

I was able to call Lourdes this afternoon and tell her that everything had been very "tranquilo" (calm) with no problems at all.  I even have a new boy in mind for El Sembrador next year.  His name is Yireh.

Today is Halloween.  Halloween is very strongly frowned upon here.  Nobody sees it as a silly holiday to paint your face and eat treats.  In a country where every other day seems to be some sort of holiday, Halloween is NOT.  It as seen as evil and anti-christian.  The kids are offended by the idea of Halloween and call it the day of the witch.  We did not celebrate Halloween today.

New boots

Violet and Misael got new boots!

Violet practicing her modeling skills

Yesterday Lourdes went through donations we received from a team in Canada.  Inside were many things including rubber boots.  The kids absolutely LOVE these boots.  Misael wore his all day yesterday and showed up this morning wearing them again.  He has to be so hot and sweaty in them.  We have tried to tell him to save them for the rain, but...  Violet wanted to wear her boots today too and cried when her mother didn't allow her.

Today was a great day for the preschool class.  We had three kids who were so small we had to cut their pancakes and spoon feed them, but they still participated well.  We played Simon Says, Duck Duck Goose, and Red Light Green Light.  It was really fun for everyone.  I had to stand out of Duck Duck Goose after I realized that as long as I was sitting in the circle, every kid was going to pick me.

For an entire week, Violet has at least attended class.  She cried a little bit on Wednesday.  Today she played, prayed and ate with the class.  This is the best she has done so far.  She gets a sticker on days that she participates.

Seeing the progress - the fact that they can stand and listen in order to play Simon Says - feels great!  There were some days that I wondered if this was even possible.  After 3 months we have fallen into a nice rhythm.  They love the class too, which is really nice.  They are proud of their class.

Yesterday was a new highlight for the whole morning group.  As I handed out the food I noticed they were all saying "Gracias" (Thank You).  All but one of the 49 kids in the morning group remembered to say thank you for their food!  This is something I have been working on since the first day I arrived.  I was so proud of them!  The one girl who forgot to say thank you is new.  She still needs time to learn.

Everyday we have to shoo the kids out when it is time to go.  Today I did the shooing.  Three boys continued playing so I told them if they didn't leave they would not be allowed to come back on Monday.  (Since it's a daily problem, that's how Lourdes has asked us to deal with it.)  Two eventually ran to get their backpacks while the third headed for the swings.  Along the way he threw his Popsicle wrapper on the ground.  I walked over and asked him to pick up his garbage and not throw it on the ground.  He got angry. He started muttering something about "That Gringa" as he left.  His friends followed behind.  But soon his buddies came running back.

There is one thing that none of the kids tolerate at the Breakfast Program.  "Malas palabras" - bad words.  The boy's friends ran to Don Juan and me with wide eyes.  They told us that Christopher, the angry boy, had said bad words.  Don Juan was really surprised when they told him exactly what Christopher had said.  When I saw the look on Don Juan's face I told the boys to let Christopher, who was long gone, know that he would not be allowed in the Breakfast Program on Monday.  Several adults and kids mentioned that this boy's behavior is reflective of the way his family behaves at home.  Jairo was furious when he heard what the boy had said.  I can't repeat it.

It is hard for me to tell the kids they are not allowed to come to the Breakfast Program, even if they say vile things about me.  I always wonder if I may be taking away their one meal for the day.  The likelihood of this is great.  I have to remind myself that it is not me who keeps them from coming that day.  It is their own behavior.  But sometimes that is hard to remember.

The kids at the Breakfast Program live in poverty that I can't imagine.  No running water, no refrigerators.  Lately the whole program has been deeply infested with lice.  It seems like Lourdes, one other mother, and I are the only ones who have avoided lice.  So far.  The mothers and Don Juan sit with the kids and pick the lice out of their hair every day.  Sometimes they sit for hours.  I have not gotten up the nerve or desire to pick lice yet.  It still kind of freaks me out to watch them pull out the lice and crush them between their fingernails.  Yuck.

Yesterday Lourdes and I were talking when Jairo called to Lourdes.  We looked outside and there was a woman who was clearly very angry.  Lourdes was not looking forward to talking with the angry woman but when she went outside she learned that the mother was there with her son, who had stolen toys from the Breakfast Program.  The mother brought her son to the church to return the toys.  She made it very clear that his behavior was not acceptable in her home.  We all talked about what a great mother she is.  Her kids are new to the program.  She doesn't know us.  It would have been easier for her to handle it differently.  But she set a good example for her son and his 3 younger siblings who are all in the preschool class.

Next door to the church is the most expensive colleges in the country.  Jairo had told me about the fact that many of the kids have body guards there.  Yesterday the kids from the college were jogging down the sidewalk along the way to church.  We followed a long trail of them.  Jairo asked if I saw all of those people driving next to the students.  I couldn't help but notice.  They were holding up traffic as they drove next to the joggers.  He said all of the drivers are personal body guards for the students.  He said this is the state of the country.  The parents have to pay for personal body guards for their kids.  The body guards have to be right next to the students because it is not safe to jog on the sidewalk.  Things like that really bother Jairo - reminders of the state of his precious country.

If you look at the pattern, even within the Breakfast Program, you can see the different paths the kids are already  on.  Some kids have mothers who are bring them to turn in toys if they steal and teach them to be responsible.  Others kids learn to say vile things to authority figures.  I hope the Breakfast Program is changing these patterns.  48 of 49 kids remembering to say "Thank You" is a small, but good start.