Wednesday, October 14, 2015

No more "Asi es"

Saturday we had a conference at my church about The Bible and Human Rights. It was interesting to see that even way back then people were fighting for human rights.

The Bible and Human Rights

God is just and loves Justice


My group's presentation at the end

Another group's presentation

Juan Jacobo organized and presented the conference

Participants with Juan Jacobo and his wife
This photo is funny because we were all on the right side and I said that a few of us needed to move to the left - you can see what happened


Sunday was another good day of healing. God showed me that He wants me to seek him with all of my heart and how it will feel like to so. Anything less is not enough.

Monday was our weekly devotional at the office. Everyone was pulling into the parking lot at the same time. A car hit my car as it parked behind me. It startled me. A man from my office was helping the lady park. I got out and said. "She is hitting me." He said, "It wasn't hard." It was hard enough to jerk the whole car with the emergency brake on.

I didn't want to make a big deal about it since these people are my co-workers. I don't know them. They could be head honchos for all I know. But I did check the back of my car. There are so many bumps and scratches from other people who have the same attitude, that I couldn't tell if they had left a new one or not. My car door is also full of scratches and chips from people in parking lots opening their car doors into it. It's frustrating to be a car owner who tries to take good care of your car in Honduras.

The time of devotion was great. About 70 people were there. My friend sang an old Honduran Christian song that she called "ranchero" style for us. I think "ranchero" is Honduran kind of the equivalent of US folk music. Not something they would sing in a church, but all about loving God.

A pastor from a church in one of the areas we serve spoke to us about human rights. He used a lot of the same scripture we talked about on Saturday at the conference at church.

After the devotional we had a monthly monitoring report where they keep track of how we are doing with current goals and set new goals. The man who founded the association was there. He made some interesting suggestions. He reminded us of the goals of the program when it was first founded 18 years ago. We were asked to keep those in mind as we move forward.

We closed with our favorite moment of the month. Many things popped into my head. Watching the kids let go of their balloons after the campaign against early pregnancy was my first thought. Everyone else talked for a long time. (In the US we are encouraged to get right to the point when we speak in public. Here people tend to be more 'flowery' in their public speaking.) I felt comfortable making my favorite moment a theme that I saw throughout the month rather than one specific moment

My heart was pounding as my turn came closer and closer. I prayed that God would give me the words I needed in Spanish and guide me in the content of what I spoke as well. He didn't let me down.

I shared with the group that I am accustomed to hearing people say, "That's how it is in Honduras." ("Asi es.") The people I serve with are different. They never say, "Asi es." They won't settle for that.

I talked about how hard everyone worked to make the campaign effective and fun for the kids. They put in their best efforts for every moment from 7 a.m. until 5 p.m. every single day. Although we were physically and mentally exhausted, nobody slowed down or took a break until we finished. It was inspiring.

I also talked about the wise counsel my co-worker gave to the mothers and grandmothers in Villa Nueva. She is young and single, but that doesn't keep her from sharing wisdom about parenting with ladies who clearly respect her and enjoy her visits to their home.

Lastly I talked about our Monday meetings where people share problems they face in the field. Some people don't feel safe doing home visits or the kids are getting into trouble - things like that. I, myself, have fallen into the habit of thinking, "Asi es" when it comes to those things. Thank God my co-workers and the people in charge don't think this way! They are quick to come up with a solution and take action. I like working with people of action! I told them it is an honor to work with them.

Everyone clapped when I was done!

What I said was better than I ever hoped. The words God gave me were positive and encouraging. They clapped to applaud each other for good work. I am happy God used me to encourage them.

Yesterday was the English speaking bible study. We are studying Daniel right now as we pass chronologically through the bible. I love meeting with those ladies! I learn a lot there every week. Sometimes I contemplate staying in bed because it is early in the morning and traffic is horrible. In the end I end up going and I never regret it.

I was supposed to have a doctor's appointment for my wrist yesterday, but the doctor wasn't in the office so they called me to reschedule. I can't get in until next week.

Tomorrow I am going to a retreat for missionaries who live in Honduras. Some friends offered me a ride, but will not know many people there. It will be fun to meet the other missionaries who come from all over the country. They have interesting speakers lined up too.

I love the opportunity to get away. Since it is dangerous to travel I don't get the opportunity to leave the city very often. I'm really looking forward to this weekend.

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Time with family

My nephews are finally old enough to talk to me on video chat! I've been thinking about it for a while and even planned to present the idea when I go home for Christmas.

Every Friday night Mom has dinner with my brother and his family so I thought that would be a good time for me to catch up with all of them at once. But since I'm on vacation this week I didn't even realize it was Friday. Mom and I were chatting as they arrived.

Jack was in front of the camera the whole evening. He'd forget I was there for a second, then remember and make a silly face at the computer. We played Legos, or rather he played and I watched. He sat me (the computer) at the table with them and they ate a ham dinner. With chocolate ice cream for desert. The boys kept feeling me ham and ice cream by holding their spoons up to the computer. I had a great time.

They are going to a pumpkin farm tomorrow. I felt sad when Joey said, "I want you to go! But you can't because you live too far." My favorite line from Joey was after he was told to say excuse me because he burped. His reply, "I can't. My mouth is full." Well, he did have a point. But as my brother pointed out, if he could say all of that with a full mouth, he can say, "Excuse me." That boy cracks me up.

I took the computer into the kitchen and showed Jack the wall where I hang art he made for me. I could hear him say, "Coooool." He liked seeing that his art was hanging in my kitchen in Honduras.

When it was time for them to head back home Jack kissed the computer good bye. Joey did the same.

I love that they are old enough to want to know me better. Jack asked what is my favorite book. He recited the first five minutes of Star Wars. Apparently that's his new thing - Star Wars. Until now, I have had a hard time keeping up with these things! I hope this will be the start of a new custom.

I wish I could go to the pumpkin patch with them. It certainly was nice to spend a few hours with them by computer.

Jack's Lego centerpiece
Joey being silly


Joey with a cheek full ♥

Friday, October 9, 2015

Learn More

Interested in understanding what is going on in Honduras? This interview is packed full of information about the problems Honduras faces and what we can do about it. If you have a heart for Honduras, it's worth your time to watch.

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzD0ZUaSrIc

Thursday, October 8, 2015

Second Hand Shopping

Last week I realized that winter clothes will be on the racks when I get to the US. Winter clothes are useful here, but only for a couple of weeks each year. I already have warm clothes. However, I need clothes to wear when it's hot and I have to go to the office.

This morning I searched on Amazon and found some dress pants I could have shipped to my Mom's house. They were only $25 each. But who knows if they'd fit? My best bet for office clothes is used clothing stores in Honduras.

Honduras has a lot of used clothing stores. They bring tons and tons (literally) of used clothing from the US and sell it here. I've found lots of good stuff in my time here. I always go to the same two stores. One has cheap prices. The other has a girl who knows my taste. We have a little routine. I pick out a couple of things to try on and tell her what I'm looking for. Then I stay in the dressing room while she hands me more and more clothes until I find what I like. It's like having a personal shopper. I don't mind paying a dollar more for the convenience.

Let me give you a mental image of her store. It is a small room, wide enough for clothes to hang on the left and right walls, with one rack down the middle. There is a thin aisle to walk on each side of the middle rack. On the tiny back wall there is a mirror and a red curtain. Today there was a little girl sleeping on the tile floor, beneath the mirror. Behind the red curtain is a bathroom which serves as a dressing room, The water doesn't work in the toilet or the tiny sink, which is good because you can pile all of your clothes in the sink and not worry about them getting wet. There is also a pila.



So this pila is inside of the dressing room. As I try on my clothes behind a curtain I am thinking that most North Americans would not like to buy clothes here. I am thinking that I have really gotten accustomed to life in Honduras because these crazy dressing rooms, with kids asleep on the floor outside, don't even faze me any more.

When I find something I like, I step over the sleeping girl and look in the mirror outside. The girl who works there "Ooooohs" and "Ahhhhhhhs" and tells me how pretty I look. Even if I don't. Today I tried on a shade of green that made my skin look deathly pale. She insisted I looked great, and very white. That part was true. I did look very, very white. Most of my Honduran friends talk about wishing their skin were lighter, so maybe the half dead look was a positive thing to her.

While trying on clothes I put on a blouse, pull back the curtain and left up my leg to step over a cement thing in the floor but before I get out of the room I am stopped in my tracks. Three men are standing there, with huge guns strapped across their chest, dressed in military uniforms. They are big. It feels like they take up the whole store. And they are staring at me. I inhale sharply and throw out my arm like a policeman trying to stop traffic. I don't know what that was supposed to do. But that's what I did.

They all look at me. As I write this I realize that I must have been a strange sight to them, too. It's not every day a "gringa" pops out of the dressing room, throws her arm out at them, and freezes with one leg in the air.

Finally I realize that my leg is in the air and my hand is trying to stop bullets. Probably my eyes are bulging out of my head and my mouth is wide open too. I pull myself together, take a quick look in the mirror, then disappear into the dressing room feeling their eyes heavy on me the whole time. I'm grateful the curtain falls completely shut behind me.

There is no threat. I feel so foolish for the way I acted when they surprised me! They are taking a break from work and doing a little shopping. The head guy wants to leave. But one of the other men tells him, "No, you have to take your time and look through everything. That's the best way to shop."

I tried on the next blouse as slowly as possible. When I couldn't hide in the bathroom any longer I walked out with all eyes on me again. I looked in the mirror as if nobody else was there. And then ducked back behind the curtain. When I came out next they were gone.

I told the girl, "They scared me! I am not used to seeing men with big guns like that. I thought I was getting used to it, but I am not!"

She laughed and said, "Don't worry. They scared me too. I was standing here, sorting through the rack of pants and I looked up at them and gasped like you did."

We both laugh. I feel a lot better. As always, she gives me a good deal. I bought 3 pairs of dress pants and 5 blouses for $35.  Even better than shopping at Ross! And much more exciting.

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Morning Traffic

The ladies in my Tuesday morning bible study commented today about how happy I am at my new position. I am going to start referring to it as "Gideon Project" from now on. It's easier that way. Plus, that was written on part of the contract I signed today. Yes, I am officially under contract as a volunteer now! I had to agree not to abuse any kids and to follow the rules of Gideon Project. At the end my co-worker said, "Now I will tell you 'Welcome!' officially!" I thought I was already official. The papers are signed. I am happy and proud to be officially part of such a great organization full of amazing people.

Yesterday we had our weekly devotional. I absolutely LOVE serving at a place that starts their week in prayer. We sang, a professional singer sang for us, a pastor from outside the organization spoke about the importance of prayer. He was funny and thought provoking. Then we had a time of planning for the week to come.

This week is full of holidays. Once again, nobody can tell me what we are celebrating. Everything is closed Wednesday afternoon, Thursday and Friday.

At my Tuesday morning bible study I learned that 7 people were nominated as regional representatives for my area of Honduran Fellowship. I accepted my nomination. I also learned that I was nominated by the leadership of Honduran Fellowship! That is so cool! Now that I have thrown my hat into the race I really hope to win. I would represent 118 adults, plus 7 organizations. I am concerned I don't know enough people to win.

Last night I sat down and wrote my monthly newsletter. It is in the editing process right now. The self confidence boost I received through God's healing on Sunday made that newsletter the easiest I've ever written. I loved writing about all of the cool things that are going on. After looking back through this blog it became clear that God is doing a lot of things in my life right now through the Gideon Project, studying under Pastora Ruth in the classes about preaching at church, and even the nomination, which I did not share in my newsletter because it happened in October.

Morning Traffic

Sunday, October 4, 2015

See you at the polls!

At church today I received an incredible gift from the Holy Spirit. My heart was healed of a burden I have been carrying around for a long time. I didn't realize all of the ways this burden was effecting me. In just the few hours since church is over I see a huge difference in my self esteem and self worth.

The healing was about issues with my Dad. Many of us have these sorts of things. Almost all of us, I think. We do our best to get rid of them using the tools we carry in our tool belt. But some wounds only God can heal.

I tried to convince myself that it was no longer an issue. Yet for the last 20 years the same nightmares kept popping up over and over when my mind is supposed to be resting in sleep. I wake up and they weigh heavily on me throughout the day. Today I prayed that God would take away my nightmares too. I believe He will.

Since I got home I remembered an email I received from Honduran Fellowship of Missionaries and Ministries. They are an amazing group I joined about a year ago. Through them I met a ton of people and attend some great conferences and retreats. They help connect missionaries with other people and resources. They handle my residency in Honduras and give advice about how to get things done, whether it be filing taxes, travel, legal stuff, deals on hotels... You name it, they do it.

The email I received a few days ago said I was nominated to represent my region for the Honduran Fellowship. I immediately dismissed the email because my mind said that I was not capable and nobody would vote for me. I even went so far as to think that the email was probably a mistake.

After receiving healing today, I decided to check and see if the email was real. I couldn't imagine who would nominate me. Turns out, it was real. Someone else thought I am worthy and capable, even if I didn't.

After reading over the requirements with my new, improved self perception, I decided to accept the nomination. I may even look into ways to promote myself and ask for votes. That would have been tough yesterday, but I feel up to promoting myself today.

It will be a big responsibility. However, I am already doing some of the things that are required - sharing information with other members, praying for members in my region, promoting and attending events held by Honduran Fellowship. About the only additional thing I need to do is create and host events for my region. I could invite people to the events we already offer at my church. For example next Saturday we have a conference on Human Rights. Pastora Ruth would love to have a larger attendance, so it would be win-win! I can also invite people to the workshops at my new "job". Most of those are open to the public, although the public doesn't know it.

I'm liking this new me. I'll sleep well tonight and let you know how it goes at the polls.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Carne Asada at Alas de Aguilas

Today was our big event to raise money for the church. We did have some meat left over, which we can sell tomorrow after the service. But we sold out of plates, chismol, sausage, beef and Coke. I hope you enjoy these photos. It was cool to see everyone working as a team. Some of these ladies have been working since yesterday. I am too tired to write.

Beans, a piece of cheese, beef (or pork if you choose) and chismol

Pork and chorizo on the grill

Nidia, Jorge S. and me hailing traffic

Not so bad being bum rushed when it's by cute kids

Advertising in the rain

We need more chismol!

Coke to go - in a bag. This is very typical here.
You bite off the corner and suck on the bag of Coke.

Two satisfied customers




These two worked into the night



Explanation

You may notice that I write a little cryptically when referring to the place where I am now serving. I thought you should know why.

When I was hired my boss explained to me that security is a big issue. There is another group of people who fight for justice against highly publicized criminals and in big media cases. Sometimes their lives are threatened.

So, I am not allowed to say publicly where I work or with whom. I am also not allowed to take photos. My church leaders know and some of my closest friends know. But otherwise it is best if my Honduran friends don't know where I work.

We have taken a lot of extra steps to ensure my own safety, as well as my co-workers. Being discreet is part of that.

Hope that explains why my writing may be a little strange when I refer to the place I am currently serving.

Friday, October 2, 2015

Home Visits in Villa Nueva

Home visits in Villa Nueva were just as fun as I expected them to be, but in a different way. I expected to see the beauty that lies in poverty. Sometimes it's a physical beauty like the houses all layered on top of one another, balanced on the side of the mountain. Sometimes the beauty of poverty shows itself in a spiritual way, like when people live their faith more deeply because they have to depend on God to provide everything.

The places I visited today were less packed together than the homes I know in Los Pinos. One home had farmland behind it and a kid with three burros. He rode the only one that wasn't saddled, which I thought was funny.

The houses in Villa Nueva, at least the part where I was today, were mostly all made of "block" (cement blocks, cemented together with cement floors). One house had tiles cemented in a design around the entryway. The houses were all at least two rooms or bigger. And everyone had a fridge. We are not in Kansas (or Los Pinos) anymore, Toto! (Although a tornado force storm did blow through today, which kept me from going to help the ladies season the meat for tomorrow's fundraising barbecue.)

I didn't end up going to the office this morning. Instead my co-worker asked me to meet her at the bus stop that goes to Villa Nueva. I don't usually ride the big yellow school buses that serve for public transportation here. I think today was my third time. I felt a little uneasy. I thought of another missionary who is spending a year here. She doesn't speak much Spanish, but she is out and about far more than I have ever ventured. I figured if she can do it, I can do it. Especially with my co-worker sitting a few seats back.

I was surprised by how many people bring a lot of big, heavy things onto the bus with them. I saw a crate of the most delicious looking avocados. They were enormous! And ladies with bags full of stuff to sell. An older man sat in front of me. He couldn't walk well, but he sat with perfect posture. He was impeccably dressed with a long sleeved button down shirt on a HOT day. He had on a hat, kind of a straw cowboy hat. I imagine he uses it for traveling. I wished I could take a picture of a man so elderly and dignified. There was a delicate beauty there.

We spent the day hiking up and down mountains. I got blisters on my toes. As we waiting for the bus to go home my calves were trembling. It was hot. The strength of the sun made it almost unbearable.0 My co-worker complained about the heat, but I didn't complain. I didn't want her to think I can't handle this job.

She showed me a road that the organization we volunteer for built. They also built many, many stairs. They have invested a lot in this community. When I got home I was talking to Fany about it. There is so much more need in Los Pinos. Why aren't they investing there? Fany had some ideas, but in general she believes that the two communites are very different. Villa Nueva is planning for and investing in its future, while she believes that many of the people of Los Pinos are living in the moment and not able to look ahead to the future.

The people of Los Pinos didn't show up to go swimming although they enjoyed it when they did go. In Villa Nueva they are having a big graduation party tomorrow. The program Familia Fuerte (strong family) started out with 18 parents. Tomorrow 14 of them will graduate from the program. That is a great statistic in my opinion. The parents learned disciple, how to show love to their children, setting boundaries, and other parenting skills - and they attended consistently! Only four did not fulfill their commitment.

We talked to those four today. They all said they would like to be part of the next class in March. One of the four did expect to graduate tomorrow after only attending the very first class. She was disappointed, saying she already bought a new dress and had an appointment at the hair salon. (I don't know anyone in Los Pinos who goes to the hair salon.)

In Los Pinos when a guest comes to visit the Mom scrambles to find money for a soda and subtly sends one of the kids to buy the guests something to drink. The kid shows up with a bottle of Coke and some cookies which you have to accept with gratitude, knowing they used their last penny to buy it.  In Villa Nueva they open their refrigerator, pull out a Coke and serve you in matching glass glasses.

They are worried about their outhouses falling off the side of the mountain, but their houses stand sturdy and strong. They have water tubes leading to ditches, rather than having the grey water or "aguas negras" running everywhere. It almost seems sophisticated.

Our job is to talk to the kids and the parents. (Many homes had a working man living there!) We asked how they were doing in general. How are the kids' grades, the kids' behavior, the home situation, the job situation, is there anything they need? We talked a lot about discipline.

One of the moms is having problems getting her kids to obey. The grandmother said the kids are very obedient toward her. But the Mom said they just don't pay attention. My co-worker gave the mom a lot of excellent parenting tips, like using punishments that fit the situation. She advised them to make the punishment stronger for a worse problem and gentler for things that aren't so bad. She reminded them to always follow through on what they say. My co-worker seems to have a great rapport with the families.

The same mother who is has problems disciplining her kids was the one who thought she should graduate from the parenting classes after only attending one class. Hmmmm... I believe there could be a connection there.

We officially visited about 8 houses today. We stopped at a few more. They were families who only had kids involved in the program for youth. We didn't stay as long with them. Along the way we passed a lot of kids who know my co-worker. She lives in the area where we serve. She is young but people seem to respect her a lot.

A man stopped us along the way to talk to her about building a daycare and a church. She told him it seems like a good idea. He asked her to please present it to our organization. She said she surely would.

Afterward I told her it was a nice change to have people asking her for things. Often, people meet a North American and they instantly see money signs. It was great to have her be the one with all of the "power" today.

I got to talk to the families casually. They were all very nice and extremely welcoming. Most are very excited (almost giddy) about the graduation tomorrow. I wonder if their excitement might be because they didn't graduate from high school? The kids were super sweet. I can see myself building relationships and learning to love the people of Villa Nueva.

All day part of me was thinking, if there is more need in Los Pinos, why aren't we serving that area? I've been told by co-workers that it's due to a lack of connections within Los Pinos. But I have some connections that could would be perfect there. Fany suggested that maybe people in Los Pinos wouldn't appreciate the services as much. I hate to admit it, but she is probably right. My previous experience is that most of the people there love to receive, but are not as eager to invest their time as the people of Villa Nueva seem to be. I hope that my connections will help serve the people of Los Pinos one day.

For now I think I need to stop focusing on the differences between the two communities and be fully present where I am serving in this moment.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Calling Erika

MRI is done. I can pick up the results Saturday, but don't expect to have them read until Monday afternoon. All of this time I assumed I would shove my arm into the machine, or perhaps they had a smaller machine. I didn't expect to have to spend 25 minutes inside the horrible thumping tube. I've done it before, so I knew I could make it, but it is still no fun.

On the way home I called Erika. The phone clicked off before I could leave a message. For a minute I wondered if she had hung up on my call. Then I realized that my phone does that all of the time. I don't jump to that assumption when it hangs up on other people, so there was no reason to assume that Erika hung up on me.

I called back and a male voice that I don't recognize answered. He must be Erika's boyfriend. He said that Erika was out but would be back soon if I were on my way over to visit. I explained I was not on my way, and thought it sure was nice to know that he was okay with me stopping by if I had wanted to!

After Erika stood me up for the first time ever on Saturday and then didn't take my calls, friends suggested Erika could be in a relationship with a man who is controlling and won't allow her to see me. I doubted it because she was always so adamant about only dating a man who treats her well, but it is certainly possible. The young man's attitude on the phone today did not seem controlling or like he didn't want me to see Erika. What a relief! I think it's a good sign that he believed I would be stopping by.

However, I have called back several times tonight and Erika is not answering. It may take a while for her to be comfortable talking with me again. Or maybe she is just busy and didn't hear her phone ring. No jumping to conclusions! At least she will see I am calling and know I am not giving up on her.

Tomorrow I am doing home visits for the first time in Villa Nueva for my new job. Yay! Exciting!! I look forward to getting out into the community and meeting the people I will serve.

The person I am shadowing will meet me at the office at 8 a.m. I am the only person who doesn't live in the community we serve. It can be a bit difficult for me to get in and out of Villa Nueva. It's super close to my house, but too dangerous to walk to. Since my co-workers live there, they just walk or take a bus to the homes they are visiting. But it is not safe for me to go there alone. My co-workers have to go the office (which is two bus rides for them) or meet me at a safe place outside of Villa Nueva and take the bus back in with me. Tomorrow if we go from the office we will probably go in with security. All of this makes working with me more time consuming for my co-workers. I feel bad but I'm also grateful that they are willing to go out of their way to help me be safe.

When I finish in Villa Nueva I am going to meet some ladies who are marinating the meat for a fundraising barbecue at my church Saturday. I figured I could help and learn how to do it at the same time. The lady who is preparing the meet is famous for her delicious cooking, so I will be learning from the best!

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Surprises from God

I have to add a second entry today because something really cool happened this afternoon and this evening.

Over the past two weeks I have been preparing myself to write another email to my supporters. You may ask yourself why I need to prepare for two weeks to write an email. It's because I have to be in the mood to write. Otherwise I spend all day trying to write and it still doesn't sound good. If I prepare and have everything in mind that I want to say, then when the day comes that I am in a writing mood, the words flow out just right.

So far that day hasn't come. I hope it will come soon. In the meantime I have a mental list of what I need to say in the letter.

One of the things that's been on my mind for the email is fundraising. I need to find a creative way to meet new people and get additional supporters. Today I prayed a lot about that. I read 1 & 2 Corinthians this morning. Paul talked about having to ask for support. He didn't seem really comfortable with it either. But he knew he had to do it. Reading about Paul thinking about his own provision gave me some comfort.

For a long time I felt like I should write letters to two specific people and ask for their support. One of those people happened to be on Facebook today. I started chatting with her and asked if she could help me out financially. She immediately said, "Yes, tell me what you need." Wow. I never expected that response. Clearly I was supposed to ask her for help.

This evening at prayer group I told them about reaching out to my friend and having her respond so positively. Later, during prayer, Pastor Paysen prayed for provision for me.

When I got home there was an email which came completely out of the blue. It is from a couple who are making a generous donation!

I love when God comes through so clearly and quickly. First He blessed me through my friend. Then He gave me a special bonus this evening in the email! He went above and beyond for me today. It feels like a confirmation that I am on the right path. I'm a lot more hopeful about future fundraising.

I told some friends about letting the dog strew my garbage all over the street. They laughed at me, but not as I expected - for allowing the dog to make a mess. They laughed at how much pain I obviously felt for that dog. And they also laughed when I said that it looked at me with the sweetest eyes. They are not used to stray dogs having "sweet eyes".

I took a big step forward in assimilation to Honduran culture by becoming a crazy mopper. But having my heart hurt over a stray dog has bumped me back a notch or two.

Fany is outside of the city with her husband's family. She planned to come home today, but now she can't. Her cousin's husband and kids were shot and killed this morning. Apparently it's all over the news. I haven't seen the news today. Fany is understandably upset. She doesn't normally get upset. She didn't go to the calling hours tonight because it is too unsafe, but she is going to the burial tomorrow morning.

MRI tomorrow

Met with the insurance agent. MRI is approved. Called and made an appointment for 3 p.m. tomorrow. Can't wait to get the results! As I was making the call I thought back to the days when I used to DREAD talking on the phone in Spanish. It was so intimidating. Look at me now, making appointments for "resonancias magneticas" with no problem. Yay!

Having one of those days where things seem to really sink in when I read, so I kept my head in the bible even longer than planned. Going to get back at it after lunch.

As I read, lots of things have popped into my head to pray about. It was a fulfilling morning.

Tonight we have intercession (prayer group) at church.

I saw that poor dog this morning on my way to meet with the insurance agent. Tried to get a photo of her, but a car was right behind me so I couldn't stop long enough.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

A day in the life

Sometimes it is hard to live in a different culture. Everyday things aren't as easy, they don't come as naturally. You can feel like just leaving the house is a challenge. I find these cultural differences interesting. To me, they can be challenging in a good way. But sometimes they can be tiring.

Today I will share "a day in the life" of an "extranjero". The word "extranjero" means "foreigner" but is pronounced like "stranger". Some days "stranger" feels most applicable.

It's garbage day. We have garbage day in the US, so that's no biggie. You take the garbage out and leave it on the curb, right? But in Honduras many people don't have garbage cans. I don't. And in Honduras there are lots of (literally) starving stray dogs on the street. Everyone leaves their garbage on the curb in plastic grocery bags. You can imagine what the street looks like by 10 am. Dogs have strewn garbage everywhere.

Fany can time it so that she runs out with the garbage when the truck comes. But she wasn't here this week, so I got the garbage out early and hoped the garbage truck would come soon.

For you to fully understand this story we need to jump back in time about three years. I remember it clearly. I was coming up the hill on my way home. Ahead of me there was a stray dog trying to walk up the hill. I say 'trying' because the dog appeared to have a broken leg and broken hip. It could barely move. I really didn't think the dog could make it up the hill. My heart ached and my stomach felt sick. I had to look away. I couldn't watch.

I assumed that dog died. I never saw it again until I found it eating my garbage today. It had opened one bag and strewn the stuff into the street, right in front of where my car was parked. It's belly was floppy and nipples swollen. Somehow, the dog that could barely stand and walk, gave birth and was nursing babies.

I should have shooed the dog away and picked up the garbage. But I couldn't. She was a hungry mommy.

She looked up at me and cocked her head to the side. She seemed to be waiting to see if I would throw rocks at her and kick her, like many people here would. In fact, she almost seemed resigned to a beating. She didn't back away from the food, but she also was not guarding it, or aggressive. She just looked at me with questioning eyes, leaving the ball in my court.

Her eyes penetrated my soul. I know that sounds dramatic. But I swear, I felt so deeply for that poor dog. She was looking right into my eyes. All I could think is that she is one of God's creatures. Her fur was all matted. She had bald spots and these gross huge skin growths, like enormous moles. She has to be in so much pain.

I got into my truck and moved it. She wobbled a little bit, trying to get out of my way. I could not bring myself to speak harshly or take the garbage away from that dog. In fact, I considered going back inside and searching for some food or liquid for her. But a quick inventory of my stuff brought nothing to mind that she would want.

I hope I don't see her again. It hurts too much. There are so many strays here. Most are too skinny. Her obvious bone fractures set her apart.

Leaving the dog behind to feast on the garbage, I went to the Marriot Hotel. We have bible study for English speakers in the lobby of the Marriot every Tuesday. Everyone dresses casually, like North Americans would for a bible study.

Last week one of my new co-workers at my new job told me that she likes the way I dress. She said I don't dress to be comfortable like most North Americans do. She said she likes that I wear heels and dressier clothes. She remembered what I had worn 4 days prior, from my blouse to my shoes. Honduran women dress up to walk to the grocery store.

Today as I arrived at the Marriot I saw a lady from my office and reporters all around. Darn! I forgot!! There was an important meeting there. Most of the important people from my office would be there. My hair was combed, but barely, and I was wearing those crazy patterned stretch pants that are popular in the US, but far too casual to be popular with Honduran women. I didn't want anyone from my new job to see me like this!

A few more people from my new job passed by, but I don't think they saw me. Lesson learned. If you are going to make an appearance at the Marriot lobby, dress nicely - by Honduran standards.

After bible study I headed over the the office of Honduran Fellowship. The last time I tried to go there someone was stabbed to death in the elevator, so the building was closed. It's a very nice office building. The man who was killed was a lawyer. He defended Honduras' Vice President of Congress. She was found guilty of stealing medication from public hospitals and selling it at inflated prices. Many people were mad when she was sentenced in July because she only received house arrest.

Two Wednesdays ago a young man entered the elevator with the lawyer who defended this lady and stabbed the lawyer dead. He confessed to the crime right there, on the scene. Some people thought he was justified. They spray painted, "Justice is served here" outside the fancy office building.

All of that to say that today I rode in those elevators. Each person was frisked with a metal detector wand and bags are searched in the lobby. I took a wrong turn at one point and a guard stepped in front of me and asked firmly where I was going. Clearly they are on high alert. I felt dumb.

At the same time I am thinking of all of those things, I have to remember Honduran elevator etiquette. In Honduras each time you enter a doctor's office, or office space, or car with people in it, or elevator, you have to remember to say "Good morning", "Good afternoon" or "Good day" if you want to be more formal.

If you are getting out of the elevator, you have to ask "permiso" ("permission")  from the rest who remain inside. It sounds simple, and it is, but when you don't grow up with that custom it's hard to remember! Especially when your mind is envisioning the completely uncensored photo that made the front page of newspapers of a man lying dead, half in and half out of the elevator.

Today I didn't dress right, and if anyone witnessed me allowing that dog to tear apart the garbage in the street they thought I was crazy. But I did have decent elevator etiquette. I only forgot to say "Buenos dias" once in six elevator rides.

Sunday, September 27, 2015

Statistics

Today I have some news that is tough to share. In fact, I don't want to share it at all. But, since this is a place that I have dedicated to recording my experience as a missionary in Honduras, and the following is part of my experience, here goes...

So you all know about Erika. She turned 17 years old on September 1st. She was pregnant at 14, had her baby at 15. Baby Marjory turned one year old on the 4th of July.

Erika has a tough life in many aspects. In February or March of this year, I asked Erika if she would like me to accompany her in her life experiences. For at least 6 months we have been walking through life together. We meet at least once each week. Sometimes for bible study or other things that may seem like work to her, and sometimes for things that are more fun. Never once has Erika disappointed me. In fact, she has superseded every expectation I had of her.

You know where this is going. Erika is 17 years old, and she is human.

Let me tell you about my part. Last week I tried to reach Erika by telephone. We always meet once per week. But last week her phone wasn't working. That is common. I talked to her mother. If her phone is not working I can reach Erika through her mother or father.

Normally she calls me collect at least once/week. But last week was different. Her mother told me she was not at home. I warned her mother that if Erika and I did not get together last week, I would not be able to see her this week because I knew I would be busy with that campaign. Erika's mother said she would pass along the message. I didn't want Erika to feel forgotten. We've never missed a week unless I was in the US.

This week I called Erika's number and there was a strange recording I had never heard before. Fany never heard it either. It said the number could not be found. Once again I called Erika's mother.

This is where I have to stop and take a deep breath before I move on...

Erika's mother answered and said, "Erika is not here. She moved out. She lives with her boyfriend."

The world around me stopped.

She said it so matter-of-fact. Like it was nothing. "Erika lives with her boyfriend."

A million thoughts ran through my mind. But I said to her, "I want to support your family in the way that you would like me to. Did Erika leave angry, or did she leave because she's in love?"

"She comes by the house every day," her mother responded. "She's not angry. She just decided to live with her boyfriend."

"When did this happen?" I asked.

"A week or two ago," she replied.

"So you are not hoping she will move home?" I asked.

"He is a good boy," said the mom. "He is a hard worker."

And then it hit me. Erika's mother and her husband have 6 kids to feed plus themselves. Erika got pregnant at 14 by a "hard worker". She had permission to date him. I bet her parents thought he would provide a better life for Erika.

When the family does not have enough money to feed their children, they may think it is best that a young man with a job takes care of one of their daughters. Maybe in Erika's mom's mind, their limited resources could go further if Erika and her daughter are taken care of by this young man.

The mom kept telling me what a hard worker this guy is. I asked questions, like, "How does he treat Erika?" "How is he with the baby?" "Can I have your permission to take her to the doctor for birth control?" She kept going back to the fact that he is a hard worker.

Finally I asked what he does for work. When she told me he is working on the stairs in Los Pinos, my heart hurt again. Most of those jobs are finished. The rest will be done soon. And then what? This boy will be without a job in a country with no jobs.

I asked her to please have Erika call me. And then I waited. No call.

The next day I got ahold of Erika by phone. She seemed happy and relaxed. She said I could meet her boyfriend.  I asked all of the questions that come to your head when a 17 year old moves in with her boyfriend. Have you talked about the future? Does he want a baby? But Erika was not thinking of those things.

We made plans that we would meet the next morning to go to the doctor. I prayed all night that she was not already pregnant. The next morning it hit me that maybe I should pray that she would show up for our meeting.

For the first time in our relationship, Erika did not show up. For the first time her phone rang and rang, but she did not answer.

Looking back, I could see this coming. When she turned 17 only 26 days ago, I talked to Erika about school. She was always excited about going back to school. But 26 days ago Fany and I both noticed a change. Fany and I discussed it and thought there may be a boyfriend in the picture.

So. What is my job now?

I have passed through the "I have failed" phase. That only brought me a lot of stress. I am done with the "I had such great hopes" phase. That was depressing.

After consulting with my pastors, and thinking about it rationally, all I can do is BE THERE for Erika. I have committed to walking through life with her. I am not going to stop the first time she takes a wrong turn. God just asks us to show up. That is what I will do for Erika.

I am sad and disappointed, but statistically, this is how this story was going to evolve. I believed that Erika was going to be the exception. Maybe she still will. I am not going to lose hope. I love her and I will not stop loving her or walk away. She needs me more than ever right now. Even though she is scared to talk to me.

Both of my pastors seemed to expect this. I have to admit, I didn't. They said the best I can do is continue to offer advice and direction, whether Erika chooses to follow it or not. So that is what I will do.

Erika is a special girl. She is choosing to live according to her society's norms. Even her parents are probably happy to see her choose this life. It is not my place to judge. It is my place to walk alongside her, as much as she will allow me, and guide Erika back to the path she was on for the past six months which will allow her to be an independent, productive woman.

Please pray for Erika. Pray that she can learn that she does not need a man to take care of her. Pray that I have the right words to approach her. Pray that we both follow God's will for Erika's life. That is all I want for her and everything she needs.

Friday, September 25, 2015

Last day of "I decide for me"

We finished up the campaign today. What a blur! Those kids kept us hopping.

I noticed the kids at this school can do acrobatics that other kids cannot. They have a tiled area which is not common here. They run across the tile doing handsprings, cartwheels and all sorts of flips. You'd think that a tiled floor would not be conducive to acrobatics, but the tile is the only difference I see between kids who flip and kids who don't flip. Most homes have cement or dirt floors, so tile probably feels really fancy to them.

I also learned that teachers only work a half day. I knew the kids have a half day of classes. But I assumed the same teachers teach all day. Nope! Morning teachers arrive at 7 and leave at noon. Afternoon teachers arrive an hour later and teach until 4:30. Now I understand how they stay sane. They have over 40 kids in their class, but they only work a few hours each day.

Yesterday someone told me something interesting. An intern in our program said he is Catholic. I asked if he knew the pope is visiting the US right now. He said he does know the pope is visiting. He said the reason for the visit is to change US laws so that all of the people in the US have to rest on Sundays.

I told him the pope can not change US laws. He insisted that the pope is going to change the law and Central American countries would soon follow suit. 

I served in a classroom where we taught the kids about self esteem yesterday. We had a "red carpet". The kids lined up along the sides of the red carpet and one child walked through at a time. The kids on the sides clapped and said nice things about the child, like, "You have a nice smile," or "You are smart." Most of them did really well.

Then we had drawings of a man and a woman. Each of the kids got a job or a descriptive word like "intelligent" or "obedient". The kids had to decide whether the words described a man, a woman, or both. So many of the kids believe that only men can work, only men are strong, only men are brave, only men can use tools. A lot of kids really believe that. The same kids also believe that only women can clean, cook, and be obedient. And only boys can play video games.

It was interesting to hear them discuss these things. Some of the kids are deeply entrenched in this mindset. It's clearly all they know and they can't imagine any other way. They were shocked to hear their schoolmates' families function differently. The boys and girls had a good time figuring out where to draw the lines. Most of them eventually realized that men and women are both capable of doing/being each of the things. It seemed to be freeing to them. You could see a light come on and then the boys started talking about washing their own underwear and cooking up a storm. I doubt they really cook as much as they say they do, but it was cool to hear them talk about cooking as a bragging right.

I also learned there is a thing called, "the test of love". It is when boys ask girls to prove their love through a sexual relationship. All of the kids seemed to know about this. We are talking about 4th - 6th graders!

Everyone learned a dance that accompanied a song called, "Piensa Bien". In English that means "think hard about it". The lyrics talked about making good decisions in order to live like a child and not grow up too fast. The kids loved the dance. They performed it today, then stayed late dancing and dancing.

Each classroom did an art presentation today about the theme "I Decide for Me" and they each wrote a song! At the end of the day they made a bracelet that signified a promise to themselves to make good decisions and respect their bodies. I was surprised at how much they accomplished in one day.

As a closing ceremony everyone lined up on the basketball courts, we discussed the theme of the three day campaign, and they all let go of helium balloons at the same time. It was the most still and calm they were in all of the three days we shared. They stood in amazement and watched all of the balloons drift higher and higher, farther and farther, until the balloons were out of sight.

As they left the teachers and principal thanked us for coming. They said everything was great and the kids really enjoyed themselves. We knew the kids enjoyed themselves, but it was nice to hear it from them.

I was proud to be part of something so impactful and well organized. It was exhausting but totally worthwhile. We will all sleep well tonight.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

1st Day of "I Decide for Me" Campaign

What a fun day! I say this despite the fact that I woke up at 4:30 a.m. and we are working 10 hours with crazy 4th - 6th graders. I am not sure how many hundreds there were. A lot.

The tiny classrooms are packed with over 41-44 kids per teacher. I don't know how the teachers are able to teach that many kids! Man do I ever respect them.

I am serving in the colonia adjacent to Los Pinos, but there is a lot of difference between the two colonias. Everyone always told me this colonia is worse, but everything I have seen so far makes me wonder. It may be worse crime-wise. But the kids sure looked great!

Of course I have only been there twice, so this is only based on my experience so far.

Therapists tell me that the parents consistently show up for their family therapy group. This is amazing to me. I am accustomed to seeing a huge lack of commitment and dedication to anything they are supposed to show up for.

The kids I met today ALL had black leather shoes. I didn't see one single shoe with a hole in the toe or the sole flopping off. All of them had pencils. The pencils weren't little stubs the size of my pinky. Many even still had an eraser.

Remember, in Honduras the school year ends in 7 weeks. The kids are not showing up in their new back-to-school uniforms like kids in the US. We are at the end of the school year here. Yet they are dressed in clean shirts with no rips. I only noticed one broken pants zipper. And their backpacks! They have beautiful back packs. The kids even have money to buy things at a little cafe right there on the school grounds. Most of the kids bought chips and candy. A few bought baleadas. All of them were eating during snack time.

I talked to the program director about the difference between the kids I know in Los Pinos and the kids at her school. Once I got home I talked to Fany too. Both women told me that the parents in Villa Nueva are more concerned about their kids' well-being and education. So far, the evidence suggests they are correct. But I need to know more.

Fany was specific. She said the parents of Los Pinos are more concerned about buying a big bottle of Coca Cola and chips, or a new cell phone, or even cable tv. Their kids' education is not a priority.

So now my question is, how to we help the parents of Los Pinos make education a priority for their children? I'm going to spend some time thinking about this.

I came home so excited! Exhausted, but excited. The program that my co-workers prepared is amazing! The theme of the campaign is "I decide for me." The kids are learning a ton and loving every second. I am also surprised at how much they already know. Today we talked about human anatomy and good touch/bad touch. The team found incredibly creative ways to make learning fun! It was like an all day festival. Except for when a boy fell out of his chair and another boy laughed at him. A fist fight broke out and I had to jump in and split them up. A co-worker grabbed one of the boys and hauled him out of the classroom.

I love working with such creative, fun, smart people. I am going to learn a lot here.

The kids in Villa Nueva don't seem to be accustomed to seeing any people from the US. I was a strange sight to them. They had tons of questions for me. The first question was, consistently, "Do you speak English?" They are dying to hear anything spoken in English. And they always want to touch my hair.

Fany just brought me a baleada. Yum! Time to eat and rest for tomorrow.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Crazy mopping

It took a long, long time, but finally I have become more like a Honduran woman than ever before. I wrote here about how Fany always has a mop in her hand. When my friends come to dinner part of clearing the table is mopping the dining room floor. Honduran ladies are crazy moppers. They mop constantly!

I always hated mopping. But somehow, within the past 2 weeks or so, that has changed. I too, have finally become a crazy mopper. Not quite like my Honduran counterparts. But close. If I am at home during the day, I mop at least once.

My floors are not more dirty than they were before. But suddenly I want them to be spotless.

Fany commented that my house is cleaner than hers lately. I told her I think it's because I feel like my weight is out of control. I started a new diet since I still can't exercise, but I am not losing weight as quickly as I'd like. The one thing I can control is keeping my house clean. It healthier than becoming anorexic. So I mop.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Let the little girls be little

It's pouring! Thundering, lightening and dripping on my pillow. I'm happy for the rain, but worried about Erika's house which is perched precariously on the side of the mountain and could wash away with a strong rain.

I pulled up in front of the house just as it started coming down. In my rush to get inside, I opened the gates, then tried to get into the car at the same time as I was opening the door which resulted in a nice purple egg on my head. Who does that? What do I say to people who ask why I have a lump on my head? "I walked into my car door," sounds like something an abused woman would make up to cover for her abuser. I am not being abused folks. I was just in a hurry to get inside and out of the rain.

My first devotional at my new "job" was even cooler than I imagined. My boss plays the guitar and we sing worship songs. Then we prayed and talked about the life of Moses from a psychological point of view. So interesting! A man raised by two very different families, in two different cultures. We talked about how his childhood may have effected his behavior as an adult. We prayed that all of our choices and actions this week be led not by emotion, but by God's calling because that is when we are most effective.

After the time of devotion we broke into teams according to the area we serve, and shared what happened last week. Some people from my team were out training teachers. The teachers reported that kids are harassing them, popping their car tires and being threatening. One of the kids is a boy we serve. The team had already talked with his teacher and with his mother. Our boss decided that we are going to send the head of our security into the school to "straighten things out" and train the teachers. I thought that was so cool! Way to step up and make changes.

I thought I'd get sent home after the meeting, but I was asked to stay and help the interns finish planning for a training this week. We worked on that in the morning. This afternoon 21 area teachers came in and met with us. We are going to their classrooms Wednesday - Friday to teach pregnancy prevention and sex ed. It is a three day campaign for 4th-6th graders in our areas. We discussed our campaign with the teachers. They loved it and are really excited for us to come talk to the kids.

Working with these people is more like what I am accustomed to from my experiences in the US. They are more progressive in their ideas.

For example, I have been extra frustrated and concerned about the way little girls are treated in Honduran culture. A couple of days after I posted in this blog about how little girls learn to pose in a sexual way, a Honduran friend posted this:


Translated it says, "How they dress the girls today" and "How they dressed me." It's talking about clothing, yes, but look at the poses! I felt a little better knowing that other people are upset by what they see.

Last week I was talking to a friend while her daughter was trying to run around us. She complained she couldn't run fast because she was wearing high heels. She is 3 years old. I commented to the mother that my mother didn't allow me to wear heels while I was in 4th grade - much older than this little girl. I remember I wanted clogs desperately, but my mother said no. This mother replied that this is what the little girl likes.

Today in the meeting they talked about 6 year old kids showing up at school in heels. They said by the time kids are 12 years old they are so "grown up" it is scary. They are right. It is scary! But who is buying the shoes for the 6 year old or the 12 year old? Their parents. So who is allowing and even encouraging this behavior? The parents. Because they say it's cute.

I like working with people who realize this is not cute. I like working with people who are willing to take a stand against things like this. I don't feel like the lone, crazy gringa with my crazy gringa ideas. These people are all Honduran people and they see things from the same point of view. I hope, through the teachers and the programs we are serving through, we can help these little girls. I believe we can.

Finally I found a place where I fit in.

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday we get picked up from the office at 7 a.m. and taken to the school in Villa Nueva. Our program starts at 8 am and ends at 5 pm. By the time the kids leave and our transportation picks us up to go home I am figuring on 11 - 12 hour days, but it will be worth it!

Saturday we have a time of prayer with the families of Villa Nueva from 10-12. The teen program is from 12-2. Afterward I was invited to spend the afternoon with my friend Oneida.

Oneida and her family (her father, 4 of her 8 siblings, her kids and nephews) are part of my church. She is probably my closest friend from church. We don't get to spend much time together, but we just hit it off. It's Oneida's father's birthday. I am going to celebrate with them. Last week after the retreat I went to their house and had the BEST time. They all have houses on one property. It is so peaceful there! Oneida's family all are eager to take me in, since I don't have family here. So, I am invited to the birthday celebration this weekend.

Tomorrow I have a day of rest, which means washing clothes and preparing for no free time until next Monday afternoon. It feels good to be part of such cool things! I am excited to see where this will lead. So far this position is exceeding my hopes.

I am not allowed to take any photos at my new "job". I am only allowed to share what they share publicly. BUT this week I am in charge of taking photos at the events. I hope they will publish some of my photos on Facebook so I can share them with you.

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Photos today

Pastor Paysen and the discipleship class

"Discipleship and Leadership" workbook

Worship time

Beautiful kids



Jorge Sarmiento sharing the message

Kids reciting the verse they learned today

Why I love my church

Tomorrow is the start of my first full week at the new position. Last Monday and Tuesday were holidays. I am excited to experience Monday devotional for the first time. What a cool way to start out the work week. Everyone in the office joins together for a time of devotion!

Church today was fun. I was there from 9 am until 3 pm, yet it didn't feel too long.

The message was excellent. It was something I have been thinking about a lot lately - "A house divided."

I see so much division in the world, but I don't see people working at unity. To me, it appears that this lack of unity is the source of many problems - within the US, within the church, within families... We live in a world so strongly focused on division, we forget how successful we can be if we work together.

Of course there are the basic divisions between political parties. Those are necessary and will always exist. They should! But recently we have taken things too far in our division. People seem to believe "It's my way or NO way." Intolerance. Being so deeply planted in their own stance, they can't consider the possibility of another point of view. It feels unsafe to even take a peek at why "the opposition" may believe the way they do. We can't put themselves in another person's shoes. No empathy. A lack of general humanity.

Where is it getting us?

I see more racial division than I have experienced in my lifetime. It makes me really sad. Guns, police, homosexuality, immigration are all hot buttons. Meanwhile, education is a mess and health care is dysfunctional. Some are pro-immigration as long as the immigrants are not trying to enter the US. Churches don't have each other's back, even within the same religion.

That is the only political rant you will ever hear from me. I don't care what side you fall on any of these issues. Because it's not about taking sides. That's the bottom line. Our division makes us weak and ineffective.

Today's message addressed division at a familial level, societal level, within churches, countries, and the world. We, Alas de Aguilas, are praying about these different levels. But what are we DOING about it? Sometimes prayer is not enough. Sometimes we have to take action.

We learned about loving each other with patience. It was really stuff we can take home and implement. I love messages like that!

Last week at the retreat Pastor Paysen announced that he will lead a new class of discipleship. He said it is going to be tough and ongoing. I showed up today excited to learn. I got the workbook and enjoyed the first class. But I did notice that some of my friends were missing.

When class was over we all went upstairs to the church. My friends were all up there. I asked why they weren't in my class. They asked why I wasn't in their class! Turned out they were in the class that I have been taking on Saturdays. At that moment Pastor Paysen asked why I was in his class, not in Pastora Ruth's. I explained I didn't know they were meeting. He told me I belong with them. He said the discipleship class is too basic for me. I was shocked!

As a fairly new Christian, I always feel like I am behind others. I was baptized and called to be a missionary a year later! My insecure part thinks I should still be working on a secure base. But both Pastora Ruth and Pastor Paysen said they want me to be in the advanced class! I am really honored, now that I am done feeling intimidated. I am also excited to be in the smaller group. I look forward to growing closer to the people I am studying with. The fellowship will be nice.

To study under Pastora Ruth is always a blessing. Pastor Paysen is a great teacher. He is super knowledgeable. But to me, Pastora Ruth is the ultimate person to study under. SO, I am really excited!!!

I still plan to work through the discipleship workbook on my own. Pastora Ruth said I can always meet with Pastor Paysen and review it with him. Sounds like a great idea. I'll continue working on my strong base in Christianity, and learn with the advanced class at the same time! I love my church. (Insert big smile here.)