Tomorrow could be the big day! I meet with Betsy from Jericho Ministries tomorrow at 9 a.m. I told Fany last night as we were walking to the store that I am nervous, although I know there is no reason to be nervous. It's not like a regular job interview where a whole bunch of people are also competing for the job. Either Betsy has a space for me in her ministry, or she doesn't. God knows if He wants me to be there. I believe He will make His desires clear to Betsy and to me.
At the same time that I am eager to start serving again, my heart is really more excited to serve with Pastora Ruth. I see this time with Betsy as transitional and an opportunity to learn from one of the best. Betsy has been doing this since the early 80's! Anything I glean from her will be a gift.
It is confusing because I feel so strongly called to serve with Pastora Ruth, that it overpowers what I feel about serving with Betsy. In my human heart I wish it were time right now to serve at Ruth's side. But that may not happen for a while and I am ready to get back out there. Of all the ministries I know, Betsy's is the one I feel most attached to so far. So that is where I will start.
I often think about the kids in Los Pinos and how I could continue to help them. I have two friends who are serving in Los Pinos with different families. Neither friend is with a specific ministry. One wrote yesterday that she had a good day, but was concerned about the violence that is happening there right now. She said the area is very "hot" and she didn't mean temperature-wise. She was just there two weeks ago and didn't mention anything about feeling unsafe, but yesterday she was worried for her own safety as well as the families she is serving. I am not sure how to serve the kids I love in Los Pinos in a way that keeps me safe. If God wants me there He will show me a way. In the meantime I talk with many of them by Facebook.
I am going to spend a lot of time today with God and pray that I am super focused for the meeting with Betsy tomorrow.
Saturday I have to give my testimony at my new church. I am nervous about a couple of things. Honestly, I have never really seen anyone officially give their testimony. Of course I have heard people unofficially share their story. But I have to stand in front of my women's group for an hour and a half. THAT has me nervous. Pastor Ruth says that my life experiences are going to heal other women. That is why she wants me to share with them. I know that God will give me the words, if I allow Him to. I pray that all that I say is received in the way God intended for each person to hear it.
Next week I may be back in ministry officially! I told Fany I am trying to enjoy this week as much as possible. Last night Fany and I had a girls' night with Cynthia. We painted our nails and had a nice dinner. We planned to watch a movie but that fell through so we scanned through novelas (soap operas) looking at the latest clothing styles and makeup.
Fany and I also realized there is a gym right by our house! I went inside and checked it out. It's tiny, and there are no elliptical machines, but it is cheaper and so close. I am dying to get back into the gym. None of my clothes fit except the biggest and stretchiest. I was thinking of joining the gym today, but then I realized I should wait one more day. After my meeting with Betsy tomorrow I will have a better idea of what my schedule will look like. Then I can commit to a gym membership. (Here it's only month-to-month anyway, but I can wait one more day to be sure it is a wise decision.)
The water did come last night! We washed and cleaned and took full advantage. However, I was tired and did not stay up until 5 a.m. like on Saturday. I need to get back into better sleeping habits if I am going to do full time ministry again.
I am laughing to myself right now thinking about sleeping habits. I spent so many sleepless nights when I was not in a healthy place emotionally over the past 3 years. Night after night I would wake up at 1:30 a,m, and not be able to fall asleep again until 5 or 6 a.m. Now my sleepless nights are only due to water problems. I choose to stay awake to water the lawn and wash my clothes. Hahaha! Praise God for all He has done for me and in me!
