Feels like home

Every time I come back to Salt Lake I am amazed by how much it feels like home.  It sneaks up on me.  I never expect it.  If I weren't so happy in Honduras I would probably want to move back here.

Today I was driving around, visiting friends and running errands.  For a moment I felt sad that this is no longer my home.  But then I remembered how happy I am in Honduras and decided to just soak it all in and appreciate that I am able to visit.

I had coffee and chatted with my friend Sandrine for four hours.  They closed the coffee shop and put away all of the chairs so we talked in the parking lot until her sister called from France.  Then we finally said good bye.  When I got home Jody, Steve and I went for a swim in their pool.  It's really hot (around 100 degrees) here every day lately.

For dinner my friend Heather treated me to sushi!  I was so happy to see her I didn't even notice she could barely walk as she came in.  She broke her toe today at work.  I haven't seen Heather since I moved to Honduras.  We had a tearful hello, then sat and chatted like it hadn't been a year and 1/2 since we last sat across the table from each other.  We ended up closing down that restaurant too.

On the way home it felt strange to drive through the city with the windows down.  In Honduras the first thing you do when you get into a car is lock it up and close the windows.  But tonight I drove through big, bad Salt Lake all by myself with the windows down.  It felt very unnatural, but good.

Back in the US, Telluride Bluegrass Festival

Just got back from 11 days of camping with good friends in Telluride, Colorado.  My brother and his family came too, but they stayed in a condominium.  We all went to a four day music festival and had a great time together.  Tomorrow I am headed for Salt Lake City for four days, then back to spend the 4th of July with my family.

My nephew, Jack, and me

Jack picked out his Honduras shirt

Joey and his Daddy, my brother, Bob

Jack, me, Bob and Joey

Jack and his new good buddy Gene

We howled at the moon!

Joey in his Honduras uniform and tie dye

Jack in his Honduras unniform

Bridal Veil Falls in the backdrop

Joey

Celebrating the 40th Anniversary of Telluride Bluegrass Festival

A parade!

Tina and her sister, Adela in the parade

Our whole clan

Beautiful place for a festival

Saying good bye for 3 weeks

Today the group that is visiting had a story time, lots of activities, singing and dancing that even the older kids enjoyed and stickers for everyone who learned the bible verse that went along with the theme.  After the team left the kids were still asking if they could tell us the verse to earn a sticker.

Every paid close attention - big or small

Sometimes our human behaviors can distance us from God
But all we have to do is JUMP back in and ask forgiveness

Christian won a contest with his shoelaces!

My friend Shelly graduated today.  She is now officially a dentist.  Wow.  What an achievement!  A doctoral degree.

Jose invited me to go to my first fútbol game tonight.  But at some point I have to clean the house and pack.  I leave for the US tomorrow morning.

Saying goodbye to everyone was different today than it was even 6 months ago.  I had to turn down dinner invitations, Christian's mom sent me fresh cheese.  Christian was so funny.  He sat down next to me and handed me a package wrapped in tinfoil inside a plastic bag.  He said, "Guess what it is?"  I picked it up and squeezed it.  It was heavy and firm with a little give.  He said he wanted to give me a cross necklace, but his mother made him bring me this.  I opened it up and said CHEESE!!!  I love cheese!  (I do, but I was worried how I could eat it all before I leave.)  He said, "My Mom said safe travels and we will miss you!"  And then he ran away to play.

I got lots of hugs and well wishes.  Lots of genuine "I'll miss you's".  I will miss them too!  3 weeks feels like a long time to be gone.  I didn't feel like this last time I left.  This time while I am gone I will miss a trip to Nicaragua.  I won't be here when Marlin finds out the sex of her baby.  Clara is going through a tough time and I'll be gone.  Lourdes and Jairo have stuff going on that I would normally help with.  There are two meetings and a final presentation for the Christmas event for Samaritan's purse.  And I'll miss the Honduras vs. US fútbol game.  Before I was never this involved.  Now there is so much I won't be a part of.

There was another death on the way home today.  I have never seen any deaths in the street before and now I've seen two in two days.  Yuck.  Yesterday's was in the newspaper today.  Two men on a motorcycle shot a taxi driver because he wouldn't pay them extortion money.

On the way to work a taxi tried to pass a car on the way up a hill and smashed head-on into a bus as they crested the top.  Taxi drivers are not known for their safe driving skills.  I didn't see anyone hurt there, but let me tell you, that little car was smushed.

Well, I'd better get to packing.  Tomorrow morning will be here soon! 

Things don't always go as planned

Nothing went right today, but somehow it never bothered me a bit.

I woke up at 4:30 a.m. from a really bad dream.  We had a meeting tonight from 5-9 p.m.  Who has meetings at that time?  (They didn't serve any food or even have a stretch break!)  I was not thrilled about being awake at 4 a.m., knowing it was going to be a long day.

This morning I had to pick up Walter at 8:30.  Usually I'm prompt but somehow I didn't get out of the shower until 8:40.  When I finally passed by to pick up Walter at 9 he kept me waiting outside for 10 minutes.  He is usually timely too so I kept the motor running and waited and waited...  Good thing I was late.

We went to immigration to pick up my immigration card.  First the boss wasn't in.  Then the machine was broken.  We left empty handed.

I wanted to go home and take a nap, but instead we headed to the church.  There is a group visiting this week and they are doing great things.  They are very hands on, singing and teaching and drawing with the kids.  They have different things planned for all week.  The kids are having a blast with them.  I love seeing all of the kids, from 2 years old to 14, enjoying themselves.  Today was pupusa day.  They seemed extra yummy today for some reason.

I got an email from the car dealership saying that after all this time - a month and a half - I have to go myself to register the car.  I knew that did not sound right, so I emailed all of the emails I have sent to the dealership, pestering them for the documents, to my friend who has been helping me with all of the car related things.  After I sent the emails I called him.  By the time he answered his phone he had already read the emails and had his assistant helping him.  He said he was about to call his lawyer.  He said the lawyer should have the papers by Friday at the latest.  I am in good hands!

So no residency, no car registration, and I was exhausted.  I tried to take a nap at the church after the kids left, but I just can't.  Don Juan even came and put a blanket over me.  It kept the mosquitoes away but didn't help me sleep.

Jairo asked if he and Lourdes could have a ride to the meeting.  I said sure!  He has driven me around for over a year.  Finally I was able to return the favor.  We stopped to pick up a prescription.  Normally it takes 2 minutes.  Today it took 10.  Jairo was worried about us being late so we took a short cut and came upon a murder in the middle of the street.  It was the first crime I have really come close to.  I was driving, so I couldn't see much, but Jairo said a cab driver got shot.  I made a quick decision and did a three point turn to get away as crowds of people gathered around in front of us.

We made it to the meeting just in time and got seats for all of us together.  The organization is called Samaritan's Purse.  They are based in the US have a lot of projects going on.  This is a Christmas gift for extremely poor kids.  But it is much more than a gift.  Their mission statement sums it all up - "To show the love of God in a tangible way (the gift)to the kids who need it most in collaboration with the local church."

The project asks the church to do the foot work and asks us to cover some of the cost, but they offer twice as many gifts as we have children in the church.  They told us to ask the kids to bring a friend to the Christmas party.  In the time before the party we ask the kids to pray for the friend they are going to invite.  The kids have a beautiful Christmas celebration learning about God and His love for them.  Then they receive a gift that comes from His provision.  They even talked about the attitude that we need to have when we prepare for the party.  They talked about how important kids are to God, how important hugs are to kids, and that no matter how much time we spend preparing a lesson, if we are only about getting the lesson across and not focused on the kids, we are not meeting their needs.

All in all it was a good meeting.  There are two more before we have a ceremony and are officially part of the program.  I am thinking I will spend Christmas in Honduras this year.

Joss and Belinda rode home with me.  It was nice to have some time to catch up with Joss.  She is incredible.  Now I'm tired and ready for some sleep.  Tomorrow will be my last day at the Breakfast Program for a while since I am headed back to the states for 3 weeks.  I'll miss the kids.  I'll miss my friends.  Tonight 3 friends called to make sure they said goodbye before I left.  I have a good life here, with good friends, doing good things.  Even when everything doesn't go as planned, it is still a good day.

A heart full of gratitude

Did you ever feel so grateful you think that your measly human level of gratitude is not sufficient to express you thankfulness?  That's how today was for me.

Two bad things did happen.  I found out a friend has prostate cancer and another friend with leukemia is 4 months pregnant.  But otherwise today was completely amazing.

This is my friend Dave and me at Telluride Bluegrass Festival in 2012.
I expected to see him again on Saturday at this year's festival.
For about the past 9 years Dave has camped there with my group of friends.
Due to his recent diagnosis of prostate cancer, he won't be at Telluride this year.
I am praying that we will see him next year, restored to full health.
For now, he will be greatly missed.

I finally got to really test drive my car on an uncongested highway.  It ran like a dream so I slowed down when I saw I was going 120 km/hr in a 40 km/hr zone.  Oops!

We had the most incredible time of worship at church.  I'll admit that usually I am done with singing after about the 4th song.  Today we say 9 or 10 songs and the spirit was really moving among us.  It was great!  Jairo was not supposed to speak today.  He is still officially on medical leave.  But he got up to say that he could feel the spirit moving and he knew big things were going to happen today in the church.

Luis Urbina spoke.  He has a gift for preaching, although it is not his official "job".  In his message he asked if we are aware of what we really want in life?  And if we do know what we want, then do we seek after God with our whole hearts to pray for those things?  (Jeremiah 29:11-14)  There was a lot more to it.  People were really, really moved.  Myself included.  He said do you have needs?  Are you sick?  Are you without provisions?  And if you do have everything you need do you seek after God with all your heart to share your prosperity and blessings with others who need it? - that's where I thought I fit in.  It was a beautiful service.

After church a friend of Lourdes and Jairo's split the cost with me and we took the Sarmientos, Belinda's family, and Walter out for pizza.  I told Jairo he should choose the place because of his dietary restrictions.  He said pizza is less greasy than Chinese food, so we went to Al Padrino.  It was a nice lunch.  Jairo said he thought it was even more tasty today than usual.

As we were leaving Jairo came to my car.  He told me that tomorrow he needs to go to the bank.  I didn't really understand why he was telling me this until the very end.  Basically the church would like to offer me some financial assistance for my time in the US!  I sat in shock as he turned and walked away.  I didn't even compose myself enough to say thank you.  Then I burst into tears.  And my car was parked behind Jairo's so they couldn't leave until I got myself together enough to drive.  I still become tearful thinking of this.  The church doesn't have money.  I don't know how they can afford to help me like this, but it is not my place to ask.  I can only be grateful.

Sometimes I have problems with self worth.  When things like that happen (the church offers me money), or when someone from the church whom I barely knew offers to pay my car insurance for a year, or when 4 people ask if I need a ride to the airport, and many tell me I will be missed when I go to the US this week, or when Christian (Conejo) asks his Mom if he can go to the US with me, or when Lourdes meets me at church this morning with a box FULL of jewelry she made for me (then compliments me on how nice I look when I wear it), or when a friend from the US tells me she is excited to talk to me on the phone - sometimes these things surprise me.  I am not good at receiving because I don't feel worthy.

We all went back to Lourdes and Jairo's house.  I collapsed in a pile of tears when they walked into the house and I tried to thank them.  They told me the church's money is God's provision for me.  I explained sometimes I don't feel worthy of such good things.  I don't remember exactly what Lourdes said because I was sobbing and trying to explain in Spanish how I felt, but at one point she said something about a husband for me.  That sobered me up quick.  I stopped crying and said, "Thank GOD I do not have a husband yet because until I learn to value myself more, I can't choose a man who will be good for me."  She agreed.  I am praying this will be my next area of personal growth.  Not the husband, but that I can know my own self worth.

Lourdes did some spring cleaning.  She gave me a ton of shoes for every occasion, some dressy jackets, warm jackets, even a full length coat.  She gave me purses and blouses and a cool bible bag.  I needed help to get everything out to the car.  It reminded me of when I was leaving to move to Honduras.  I gave away almost everything that I couldn't fit into my suitcases.  I came here with 2 suitcases.  Now I have a full wardrobe with more clothes than I need.

Lessons for today:  God always provides.  I am appreciated and loved.

Thank you for reading!  Another lesson in self worth - I am always shocked to see that an average of 40-50 people from literally all over the world read my blog every day.  Thank you for caring about what is going on in Honduras.  And thank you to those who care about me.

Two jokes

I forgot something really funny that happened today.  Hope it translates into English.  In Honduras there are 2 phone companies.  One is Tigo, the other is called Claro.  There are huge billboards all over advertising for Claro that say, "Claro que si."

"Claro que si" translates in English to "For sure" or "Of course" or "By all means" - you get what I am trying to say.

So today a girl asks Marlin if she can use Marlin's phone.  Most people have two phones, or at least two chips - one for Claro and one for Tigo because the calls are usually free if you call another person within the same company.  Before she dials the number, the girl asks Marlin if Marlin has Tigo (because she is calling someone with Tigo).  Marlin answers, "Claro."

The girl and I look at each other.  We are obviously thinking the same thing.  Does Marlin have Claro?  Or is she saying "Sure" that she has Tigo?  We cracked up laughing.

The girl asked, "Claro que si?" or "You have Claro?  Marlin still says "Claro" and we just look at each other again.  Finally through my laughing out burst I ask if she has Claro or Tigo.  She looks at us like we are dumb and says very simply "Tigo".

I hope someone found that funny.  It sure was funny to me.

Another funny thing that happened was that yesterday a rumor started that I had sold my car.  I don't know why that rumor started.  One of the girls at the Breakfast Program told me she was really sad that I sold my car because it matches me really well - my car and I are both pale.

I guess I can see where she was coming from.  Sometimes kids say the funniest things.  And Marlin too.

Jairo, Belinda, Anna, Jacky and I all think Marlin is having a baby boy.  Don Juan thinks it's a girl.  Marlin said she doesn't know.  Her tummy is getting really big!  I am sad I will miss out monthly photo on the 22nd of this month.  Marlin told Lourdes yesterday that she is thinking of going to a different Dr for her ultrasound because where she usually goes they only check to see if the baby is healthy and they get mad if you ask if it is a boy or a girl.  I'm more and more sure it is a boy.  But we'll see.  How sad that the ultrasound people won't tell you if they see a boy or girl!

Strawberry Jam and Cream Cheese

We had a lot of kids today at the Breakfast Program.  I really didn't count how many.  The older kids are coming more regularly because there is an outing for them tomorrow.  The only kids allowed to go on the outing are the ones who attend the jovenes group every week.  But they figure if they show up at the Breakfast Program they may be allowed.  It worked for some.  They are going swimming and having a BBQ.

I had a pleasant surprise.  As I rode into the city with Jairo and Walter this morning the mechanic called Walter's phone and said my car should be ready by 2 pm.  I didn't get my hopes up.  But then he called back at 3 to say it was ready!

He fixed everything we knew needed fixing, plus found a couple of other things, all minor details.  A noise that was driving me insane was because the previous owner put parts on it that weren't Honda brand so the suspension was too stiff.  Now I have new parts for that and no noise.  Once of the ABS sensors was bad - we knew that when we bought it.  That is fixed.  A brake light was out.  The filters and spark plugs are clean.  Now there is just one thing left to be done that he will work on while I'm gone.  It has something to do with the Spanish word for bullets, so I'm guessing ball bearings or ball joints or something.  But so far it hasn't cost much at all.  The car ran well before, but now it's running better than ever.  I am really blessed to have found a good, fast, trustworthy mechanic in Honduras.

I stopped at Mas x Menos to look for vanilla for a friend in the US and broccoli for dinner.  I was starving.  Only had a yogurt at 9 a.m. and it was after 6 pm.  I decided I could hold out for a good, home cooked meal rather than throwing something together fast.  Plus I'm trying to use up everything in the fridge that will go bad while I'm gone.  I came into the house to find Jetty downstairs once again.  (Yay!)  And no power.  (Boo!)  The skies are clear, no rain or wind or thunder.  No idea why the power is out tonight.  Not only is it a bummer that I can't cook anything for dinner, there is an important soccer game on TV.  Everyone in the world wore their jerseys today.  And I am stuck with no oven and no TV.  BUT  I am going to look at the bright side.  My car is fixed for much less money than I expected and I had the fixings for a strawberry jam and cream cheese sandwich.  So, overall it was a good day.

My first Honduran "Hole in the Wall"

Been a while since I wrote.  First I was busy because Lourdes and Jairo were in Guatemala.  Now I'm busy because they are back.

Yesterday we dropped my truck off for a check up before it gets to 100,000 kilometers.  They found a few things that need to be fixed, which is no surprise, so I am without a car for a while.  I hope I'll get the car back before I leave to go to the US, but I'm not holding my breath.

Yesterday we went out to lunch to celebrate Lourdes and Jairo being back home.  They took me to a place they said every person who lives in Honduras should go at least once.  I kept thinking about how much my Dad would have loved the place.  The owners started out as street vendors, cooking over big barrels on the side of a dirt road.  It's still a bad neighborhood, but a dining destination.  Everything is cheap and good.

We had what I can best describe as the Honduran version of samosas with a typical Honduran "salad" (cabbage) on top.  It was deep fried and fattening, but delicious.  Jairo and Walter stuck to their diets and ate yucca.  I told Jairo that when he lives in the US, if anyone ever asks him if he wants to go to a "hole in the wall" he should always say yes because this type of place is the definition of a hole in the wall.  Picnic tables, bottles of rum turned into containers for "chilis".  I even saw a pigeon walking around inside.  It wasn't bothering anyone.

In Honduras pigeons are not thought of as dirty nuisances, like in the US.  People here often comment about how pretty a pigeon is.  That was a strange thing to get used to at first.  But I have learned to see pigeons as pretty now too.

I am back to riding everywhere with Lourdes and Jairo.  Jairo said it is good for me to learn dependence again and that everything does not move in MY time.  He's right.

Monday the Breakfast Program is cancelled because we are all going to a meeting for Samaritan's Purse - the people who are giving gift boxes to needy kids in our area.  We have to go to three weeks of training to learn how to receive and distribute the boxes.  It actually sounds really interesting.  I am disappointed that I won't be here for the second and third week.  I am also REALLY disappointed that I won't be here for baptisms this year.  I love baptisms and I love the day after baptisms when all the kids at the Breakfast Program get to swim in the pool.  Bummer.  I am considering cutting short my time in the US and coming back early.  I am also fairly sure I will stay in Honduras for Christmas this year.  That will be a fun, new experience!  It will be nice to be here to hand out the Samaritan's Purse boxes and to see the Christmas celebration at the church.

As I opened the door to my house tonight I had a new experience.  Usually as I approach the house I can hear Jetty meow from upstairs.  As I put the key in the keyhole I heard her cry, but it sounded like she was just on the other side of the door.  I opened the door slowly and sure enough, there she was.  She led me straight over to her empty dry food.  I realized I hadn't fed her this morning because she had some food in her dish, but not enough to last the 10 hours I was at the church.  So she went downstairs to look for the other food dish I keep down there.

Part of me is happy for Jetty because now she can explore the whole house and have a more diverse life.  I hated that she was just staying in my bedroom all of the time.  That's not healthy for her.  On a personal level I would love to get her litter box and food downstairs.  But at the same time I am leaving to go to the states.  Jetty has a tendency to jet out the door quicker than quick, so I am a little nervous she will get out while I am gone.  I trust the cat sitter, but it has happened to me more than once, even when I am careful.

Sunshine and Rain

When I saw the date on my bulletin at church today I realized I'll be back in the US in 10 days!  Wow.  Time flies!

Last night was a really mellow evening with Jose and Karla.  We ate Chinese food, the girls went to bed, Jose hung out for a while with droopy eyes.  He had been working since 7 a.m. and had to get up for school (yes - on a SUNDAY) at 5:30 a.m.  When he excused himself to go to bed I didn't blame him a bit.  But Karla is still Karla.  She can work all day and stay up all night.  So we chatted until 11:30.  It was nice to just sit and talk.  No tv, no kids, just us.

When I moved to Honduras I imagined myself at their house all of the time.  This is only about the fourth time I've visited in over a year!  I told them I want to come over more often on Saturday nights because they live so close to the church I can sleep late and still get there on time.  Well, we were a little late, but that was because we couldn't find the sugar.  I'll explain that later -

Karla told me she was really shocked when I called yesterday to confirm.  She didn't have my number saved in her phone yet because she was assaulted a few weeks ago while coming home from work.  They stole her camera, cell phone, computer, a significant amount of $ and her wedding ring.  She just got a new phone and hadn't put my number in yet.  She said when I called she didn't recognize my voice because I didn't sound like a "gringa".  She was trying to figure out which of her Honduran friends were calling when I told her it was me!  She and Jose had a good laugh over that.  They remember 4 years ago when my Spanish was not as good.  Now I blend right in!

This morning as we were getting ready for church Karla asked if I wanted some coffee.  I told her usually I don't, but today I could use some.  As she was brewing the coffee she realized there was no sugar in the house.  She searched everywhere at least 3 times and couldn't find sugar.  I was wishing I hadn't asked her to make coffee as I really don't enjoy it without sugar.

Meanwhile her daughter Valery, who has Down Syndrome and is almost nonverbal, kept asking for one of the containers on the shelf.  Valery LOVES sugar.  After Karla ended her search she leaned over and asked Valery what she wanted.  Valery said sugar.  Karla explained there was no sugar, but Valery kept pointing to a container.  Finally Karla took down the container and shook it to show Valery it was empty.  Then she opened it as a final demonstration.  To our amazement there was sugar inside!  It was sugar in the raw as we would call it in the states.  It must have been humid enough that the sugar stuck together and didn't move when Karla shook the container so it felt empty.  We all laughed and clapped for Valery because she was so smart and persistent in helping us find the sugar.

Yesterday before I left I sent a message to my landlord and her daughter, letting them know I would be gone for the night.  I contemplated if I should.  It felt a little childish.  But I thought they might worry if my car wasn't in the driveway all night.  Later I saw my landlord's husband at the church.  I told him I felt a little foolish telling them that I was spending the night with my friends.  He said no, thank you for telling us.  He explained he can't sleep at night, even when he is really tired, until everyone on the property (including his brother and their household) are home.  He said when he and his wife pull into the driveway after work the first thing they look for is my car.  On the occasion that it is not there, they keep checking until it is.  Good thing I keep reasonable hours!  He said exactly what I was thinking when I sent the message to his daughter and his wife.  It's not about where I am and what I am doing, it's about safety.  I told him I really appreciate that they look out for me and I have no problem making sure they know my whereabouts.  What a blessing to be surrounded by so many people who care so much!

This afternoon was beautiful.  There were dark storm clouds over the city.  It rained as we left church.  But up in the mountains it was sunny and just the right temperature.  The air was cool but the sun was warm.  I decided to go for a little walk.  I found two tomato plants in front of my house with three red tomatoes and a bunch of baby green ones.  They were lying on the ground so I grabbed some sticks and propped them up, thinking I should really get some twist ties because the first heavy rain would probably knock them down.  I noticed a tree with greenish yellow fuzzy fruit on it.  Looked like peaches, but I've only seen them ripe before.  Just then Carlos came walking along.  I showed him my tomatoes.  He got a laugh out of the way I had propped them up.  Then I asked about the fruit.  He said they were peaches, reached over, grabbed one off the tree and took a bite.  He said he never saw this tree before but it was FULL of fruit.  He grabbed me one and just as I took my first bite of the crunchy green peach, bullet-like raindrops started to fall.  We stood there in the sun, enjoying our peaches.  But the rain started coming down harder so we headed up the mountain.  It let up for a second.  We chatted and watched the rain fall through the sun, but then he pointed South and I heard the sound of pounding rain coming from that direction so he made a dash for his house.  I went upstairs and grabbed Jetty.  She and I stood out on the balcony and watched the sunshine through the rainstorm.  She seemed to like it too.

5K at K2

I just learned that K2, my home church in the US, did a fundraiser for the Breakfast Program today!  I knew they were doing a 5K fundraiser, but I didn't know anything about a table for Honduras.

My headache is gone!  Today is a day of laundry and house cleaning.  Then I'm heading off to Jose and Karla's house for a night of Chinese food, movies and fun.  I am excited to spend time with them.  Evenings like this are something I used to look forward to during the 3 years I was in the US, waiting for God's time to move to Honduras.

I just did my monthly budget.  Gasoline cost $265 this month which I don't have in my budget.  If anyone is able to help out with that, it would mean that I don't have to cut down on the way I help out around here.  Please consider supporting me on a monthly basis, or offering a one time donation.  Thanks!  www.WorldOutreach.org/donations  - Click on my name (Fager, Mary Lynn)

My first hole

Marlin called me twice before I left home this morning.  She has one way of doing things and does not like to vary from that.  Today she planned to cook her special rice and vegetable dish, but there were no vegetables.  That really threw her off.  I told her that Walter said he was going to bring the vegetables and he knew she was going to cook with them today.  Walter is very dependable, so I expected the veggies to be there.  We discussed other options and agreed since she had already cleaned the rice she could make a different rice dish.  Marlin thought it was imperative that we serve tortillas with the second option.  Finally I convinced her that it was not, but to just hold on until we could talk to Walter.  Turned out that he was only moments away with the vegetables.  Catastrophe averted.

My head started aching last night.  I thought of calling Belinda and asking her to cover for me for me today, but then decided against that.  Yesterday I promised the kids special prizes because they were able to recite bible verses.  I also told the adults I would make liquados for them today.  I wanted to be there.

The kids were proud when they got their prizes.  All of them want to memorize more scripture so they can win prizes.  I am giving them simple things, like bars of soap or bite sized candy bars, but they love it!

I made the liquados.  Everyone agreed that if I need a second job I can sell liquados.  The headache got worse.  Marlin agreed to stay and clean up the kitchen so Eunice encouraged me to go home and rest.  After I got home it started raining really hard and my headache seemed unbearable.  I tried napping but couldn't.  It eased to the bearable range as evening came.

The rainy season is certainly here.  It rains every afternoon, then clears and rains again at night.  Lately I have been running the dehumidifier every day.  The humidity in my house has been at 86% but I can bring it down into the high 40's with the dehumidifier.  I am hoping to avoid mold growth, but know that my electric bill is going to be enormous.

I am no longer the only person I know who does not have a hole in my roof.  Two nights ago as I was lying in bed reading my bible I noticed the page was getting tiny splashes on it.  After checking that the windows were closed I came to the sad conclusion that it was coming from above.  Sure enough, there was a spot above my bed that was drip, drip, dripping.  I shoved my bed to the side and put a garbage can under the leak.  Yesterday morning I told my landlord about the hole.  He said he will fix it this weekend.  It is the first, but it won't be the last, I'm sure.

I am excited to spend the night with Karla and Jose tomorrow.  I hope this headache goes away so I can fully enjoy my time with them!

Yellow eyes

Today did not go as expected.  The lawyer we are working with is not the best communicator.  He told me to come to his office with 400 Lempiras ($15) because he had my residency card there.  We got there and he had no residency card.  Then he wanted $350 for his final payment.  He took us to the Dept of Immigration where he talked to a couple people so we got to cut the line, which was short, and I got my passport back.  I filled out the paperwork for my residency.  They charged me another chunk of money which was not 400 Lempiras, and told me I will get my residency card in a month.  He also didn't tell me to bring a copy of my passport, so poor Walter had to run all over looking for a photocopy machine to make a copy of my passport.  I have copies in the church, at my house, and at the lawyer's office that we could have brought.

He kept telling Walter to tell me to calm down.  He said I was too nervous.  I told him I am not nervous, I am excited!  Then he kept talking to Walter instead of to me.  Walter told the lawyer that he is only riding with me, he has no idea what is going on.  Even when I gave the guy $350 he said thank you to Walter.  He never acted this way when I visited him with Jairo.  If you ever want a recommendation for who NOT to get as a lawyer in Honduras, call me.

The lady at the Department of Immigration was really sweet.  I was glad I have a year of living here under my belt because I had to fill out a lot of paperwork and she had to ask me a bunch of questions.  I would have struggled a year ago, but today went smooth until we got to the information about me.  She asked my height.  I said, "Uh oh, I only know in feet."
She said that's fine - she had a conversion chart.  Then she said, "And your eyes are...  yellow???"
I said, "Well sometimes they are green, depending on what I wear, but you should put brown."  She seemed very confused.  It takes little things like that, or this photo, to remind me that I am not the same as everyone else in Honduras.  It is a new, strange experience to be a minority.

In the states people think I have dark skin.
But I look pretty white in Honduras.

The computers were really slow so the lady and I talked while she did my finger prints and inputted some stuff.  She asked if I like it here and I told her I really do.  She asked what I am doing and I explained the Breakfast Program.  She said she was sad to say this, but she is glad that missionaries are here because she has seen too many local people sell food that is supposed to be used for kids.  She loved hearing about the Breakfast Program and said that she wanted me to tell my story to her boss because he could speed up the process of getting my residency card.  I said sure!  He didn't seem as impressed as she was, but he stamped my paper and told me to come back in 12 days, my card will be ready.

Last night Karla invited me to come to her house Saturday night and spend the night.  Adults spending the night at other people's homes is more common here.  I was excited and told her we could celebrate my residency, since I expected it to be official today.  I am still excited to spend time with Karla and Jose.  It is important that I reach out and broaden my support system since Jairo and Lourdes plan to move to the US.

On Sunday I told Ethel, the leader of the church elders, that I thought Jairo had probably already told her, but I wanted her to hear from my mouth that I am staying in Honduras.  She asked how long I plan to say.  I told her I can't really say.  She asked if it would be indefinitely.  I said yes, indefinitely.  She said until God tells me I should be somewhere else.  I think she was pleased.

It is pouring outside.  Better go make dinner before the power goes out.  Monday night it went out about 9 pm and was still out when I went to the church the next morning.  Men were everywhere working on the lines as I drove down into the city.  Seemed like every third pole had downed lines.  Welcome to the rainy season in Honduras!

Bazillipedes

I just saw the most enormous millipede I have ever seen in my life.  It was under my kitchen table. I went downstairs with an appetite and after trying to kill that thing I was no longer hungry.  The darn thing would not die.  It would be smushed into a pile from my shoe, but each time, no matter how much I mashed, it would unravel itself and scurry along.  Those things are fast too!  It was longer than the length of my hand from palm to the end of my middle finger.  To be honest I am still not sure it's dead.  It is wadded up in a napkin in my garbage can, but I do not doubt that it could still unravel itself and crawl out.  Should have flushed it.

A few days ago I found two different baby scorpions under my night lamp.  At least that is what they looked like to me.  They are pretty unmistakable.  I worry about Jetty.  She likes to chase bugs.  Hope she doesn't chase the wrong one.  The rainy season has only just begun and it seems to be bringing crazy bugs out of the woodwork (or cementwork as the case may be).  Yikes!

Note to self:  Wear footwear at all times.  You never know what you may step on.

Turn grumbling into gratitude

This is what I saw as I closed the porton and left my driveway this morning.  I love seeing all of the people on horseback.  Not sure what was in the big red bags but the man was very nice.  We smiled and said good morning.

Things were a little hectic at the Breakfast Program today.  We ran out of cooking gas right as it was time for  us too serve the food.  Don Juan and I ran down to the gas station, then to the next gas station, then to the grocery store.  Everyone said the city was out of gas tanks.  Don Juan called a lady he knows who owns a restaurant and cooks with a gas stove.  He asked her how she was getting her gas.  She said told us about a guy who delivers gas on a motorcycle.  We called him and ordered a tank of gas.  We were thinking he might beat us to the church because he could get around faster on his "moto".  He showed up later in the afternoon.  By then the kids were fed and gone.

Every day for months Christian (Conejo) has asked for prayer for his Aunt.  This morning at 6 a.m. she died.  He told us very factually and seemed to go about his day as normal.  I'll check in with him tomorrow.

I got to Skype with a friend in Salt Lake.  She and I are close friends but we are not good at keeping in touch by computer.  It is so cool to talk to someone only occasionally and still feel as connected as if you spoke every day.  That is true friendship.

Had a bunch of errands to run today.  Gas, groceries, meds for someone at the church.  On the way home I was calculating all that I spent and feeling a little overwhelmed.  Then I realized what a blessing it is that I am able to do all of those things.  I know many people here who can't afford a weekly shopping trip, who don't have a car and probably never will, who don't have a refridgerator, or even a cooking stove.  After thinking of it that way, I felt very blessed to have a full tank of gas, a strong car with groceries in the back, and a refrigerator to keep things fresh.  It was kind of like turning a frown upside down.  What had felt like a burden was really a blessing.  I just hadn't looked at it that way.

As I headed up the mountain I passed Jairo and Walter in the van on their way down.  That seems like a very small thing.  But it was a really big moment for me.  They recognized my car and waved.  I beeped the right beep.  (Honduras has it's own beeping vocabulary.)  Everything felt so right.  Finally, the day has come that I am able to function on my own.  I do not depend on them for everything like I used to.  I thought about all that Lourdes, Jairo and my church family have done for me over the past year.  I can never repay them.  It is not possible.  They took care of me and looked out for my every need.  Finally it is time for me to do things on my own.  It felt great to pass Jairo and Walter and see them wave.  I feel like part of the team.  Now I can serve without burdening anyone.  They have never once given me the sense that I am a burden, but it sure is nice to be independent.

Jetty resting on a rainy day

It's official.  The rainy season is here.  During the rainy season my electric bill is going to be crazy.  I've been waiting for a sunny day to do laundry, but finally broke down and used the dryer for clean sheets and jeans today.  I am also using a de-humidifier.  It sucks the moisture out of the air like crazy.  According to it, this morning the humidity in my house was at 83%.  From what I have read, if I want to avoid mold growth in the house I have to keep the humidity below 50%.  I am worried about my electric bill, but grateful that I have a clothes dryer and a de-humidifier.  At the moment the power is out.  Maybe I should be grateful for that too - keeps the electric bill down.

Bus blockade

Today I got caught in the middle of a...  Well, I don't know what you would call it.  Not a pep rally, it was more of a protest.  The goal was to encourage people to vote for a certain presidential candidate.  Hundreds and hundreds of buses were stopped in the street with posters plastered on them.  The buses were full of people who did not look very thrilled to be there.  I don't think they were really in on the campaign effort, but a few flew flags out the windows while they completely stopped all of the traffic in the city for the entire day.

Now for me, being held up in traffic and late for church does not encourage me to vote for the face on the poster on the bus in front of me.  I don't understand the mentality behind this form of "grandstanding".  It did not endear me to the candidate, but did cause me some frustration.  Until I realized that since I was not moving this was a perfect opportunity for me to take pictures of the spiked buses!

Check out these spikes.  Imagine this bus coming toward you on a narrow road.

Banners drooping more than flying

After I made it past everything on my side
I saw they had blocked the other direction too

On the sidewalks were teens walking around with a wooden dowel in each hand.  I never saw any violence, but I did contemplate going back home.  The strange thing was, the police had the exits blocked and forced us to go up the highway to the point where it was blocked in the other direction, so if you turned around you would get caught again on that side.  Made me wonder if the police were participating.  They were also pulling over taxi cabs and detaining them at check points.  People couldn't travel by bus (because the buses weren't moving) and it was hard to find a taxi.  Hmmmm...

Jairo is still supposed to be at home recuperating so Walter spoke at church today.  He was really great.  Everyone really likes it when he preaches.  He certainly has a gift.  What was especially cool for me is that I have been thinking a lot about two things this week and he addressed each of them.  I was actually thinking of setting up a time to meet with my landlord to talk to her about those things, but all I had to do was go to church.  I found my answers there.

After church I went out to lunch with my friend Raquel and her husband.  She was my first friend outside of the Breakfast Program.  She invited me to go to lunch with her last year in November for my birthday.  We hit it off right away.  She was unemployed and struggling to get pregnant.  I was struggling to make friends.  Now she is 4 months pregnant, has a great job, and I have some great friends!  God is so good to us!!

The day of the dying ants

Ugh.  I may not sleep tonight.  This is the day of the dying flying ants.  A year ago, almost to the day, I came home to find my house covered in ant wings.  Last year I was lucky enough not to see how they got there.  It is a disgusting process.  The flying ants fly around until their wings will no longer hold them up.  Then they crash and flop around until their wings fall off.  Then they slither away - half ant and half what we used to call "silver fish" when I was a kid.  It is repulsive.  I have found them inside my undergarments, all over my pillows and covering the floor.  I can hear them bang against walls and fall to the ground, buzzing around.  Bet you wish you could experience this natural phenomenon for yourself, don't you?

Today was a super good day though.  I have lots of photos to share with you.  Yesterday was great as well, and tomorrow is promising to follow in the footsteps of its predecessors.

Yesterday I went to a special presentation for people who work with kids.  It was given by an international organization called the Good Samaritans.  They have volunteers in Honduras who do a lot of things, including offer gifts to really, really poor kids through their local church at Christmas.  The idea is that the whole thing is about much more than getting a gift.  It is a time for the kids to learn about God and share the blessing with their family.  It is a very cool concept even if I don't explain it very well.  We can even do community outreach if we want to.  The point is that the gifts go to the poorest of the poor.  That is certainly the community we serve.  (Gosh was that ever apparent today, but I will talk about that later.)

Going to meetings like this with Jairo and his sister Ruth is great.  As the presenter stood up to start the program he made a point to welcome Ruth and Jairo individually.  They are like celebrities.  Everyone knows them.  After the meeting Jairo introduced me to a lot of people.

Jairo had just gotten his stitches out from the gall bladder surgery 2 weeks ago.  One of the men came up and socked him right in the belly where his stitches had been as he said hello.  I cringed.  Jairo is still doing well.  He is moving about slowly.  Getting in and out of the van is not easy.  But the area where the stitches were healed very well, especially considering that he has diabetes.  It's not even very red.

Today the kids from Pinares (a local private school that is one of the best in the country and very expensive) came to visit the Breakfast Program.  The kids were all really great.  They seemed to mesh well together.  Our kids came early, nicely groomed and dressed in their best.  Angelica wore a dress over the top of her soccer jersey.  Each Los Pinos kid was assigned a Pinares partner early in the morning.  Almost all of them chose to stay with their partners all day.  I thought that was so awesome!

While the kids all blended together, the differences were obvious from an adult point of view.  The kids from Pinares are much bigger than kids the same age from the Breakfast Program.  In fact they are bigger than older kids from the Breakfast Program.  I never noticed how small our kids are until they were stacked up against 3rd graders today.  Chronic malnutrition.  The boys from Los Pinos have very short hair cuts.  The boys from Pinares have bowl cuts.  Lourdes says Los Pinos kids have shorter hair because of the lice epidemic they face.

One of the girls from Pinares started to ask me in Spanish, then I think she didn't want the local kids to understand what she was saying, so she switched to English.  She said, "It's not very safe here."  Before I could answer, she asked, "Is it safe here?"  I wasn't sure how to answer.  I asked if she felt unsafe.  She looked around and said no, she did not feel unsafe.  But, she said, the outside gates aren't locked and there are no guards at the gates.  (I don't know how she noticed that but clearly it seemed strange and unsafe to her.)  I told her we do have a guard.  That is, after all, Don Juan's official job.  Although at that moment he was making cement to hold up a fence post.  She didn't need to know that.  Don Juan was at the front gate.  I told her that no bad people ever try to come in.  She asked if this was a school.  I said no, it's a church.  She said this is a very strange church.  She said so none of these kids go to school?  I told her all of them who are school age go to school, but they go in the afternoon.  I wonder if one of the body guards standing nearby was hers.

Last time the kids from Pinares visited I was amazed at how many men came to accompany the children.  I thought they were all fathers of the kids.  This time I learned from the teachers that the men who stand along the sidelines (with walkie talkies and FANCY cars) are not fathers to these kids.  They are body guards.  Famous people in the US have body guards to keep away the paparazzi.  In Honduras whole families have their own individual body guards to prevent kidnappings and other bad things.  As bizarre as it seemed to me, these kids couldn't imagine it any other way.

A fun time was had by all.  The bus left, followed by a caravan of Land Cruisers (apparently the chosen car of body guards) and all of the kids from Los Pinos headed off to their school.

This afternoon Jairo came to the church.  Jairo is supposed to be taking it easy still, but he has been going stir crazy since his second day in the house.  He has been doing so well on his new healthier eating habits we have to cut him some slack.  After all of the kids left we went through the donations they brought for the Los Pinos kids.  We separated it all out and labeled bags full of clothes for the kids.  They will be excited on Monday!

Two days ago when it started to rain I thought it could be the start of the rainy season.  I think I was right.  Today we have had rain twice already.

Tomorrow I have to be in front of Lourdes and Jairo's house at 7 a.m.  Six of us are going to a conference down in the city for people who work with youth.  Jairo keeps saying it is going to be really great and that I will like it a lot.  I am interested to see what it will be like.  Not so thrilled, however, with the idea of having to get up so early.  I have never been a morning person.

Lourdes and the kids welcome 3rd graders from Pinares

Kristofer praying 

Junior finds a person to hang on in every group

Pinares serving Los Pinos

So helpful and sweet!

This girl from Pinares never left Lupe's side

Saying good bye to the kids from Pinares

The bus followed by the procession of Land Cruisers

Walter, Don Juan and Jairo