If I didn't love it here, I would hate it.

Today I posted on Facebook about washing my clothes in the pila, then dropping them in the sand.  Some people were saying they admired my hard work.  I see what they are saying, but if they only knew how easy I really have it here compared to others.  I just ate a half pound of queso fresco con chilis (fresh, handmade cheese with cilantro and chunks of jalapeños), then was still hungry so I ate a full dinner and even had some desert.  Most people here are not so lucky.  In some ways, life here can be difficult.  Even for me.  If I didn't love it so much, I'd hate it.

I'd hate the mosquitoes and the man eating ants.  I'd hate the heat with no air conditioning.  I'd hate the shower that only has one temperature and water from the faucet that I can't use for drinking or brushing my teeth.  I'd hate washing all of my dishes by hand in cold water.  I'd hate walking into the house to find a matchbox car sized cockroach, lying on it's back in the middle of my kitchen floor.  I'd hate not being able to walk to the store by myself.  I'd hate having to rely on other people to take me everywhere.  I'd hate reporting to Jairo every place I go and who I am with at all times.  I'd hate having spotty internet access, no mail system, and only talking to my family only on occasion.

 But I honestly don't dislike any of those things.  Except the mosquitoes.  The rest I see as a challenge or as something to learn about, learn from, and adapt to.  None of those things can outweigh the happiness and peace I feel here.

Today I woke up early. (Another thing I am getting used to here is darkness by 6 p.m. and sunrise at 5:30 a.m.)  I painted my nails watched some tv, read a book and fell back asleep until the phone rang at 10:30.  It was one of those "I have no idea where I am or what time it is" experiences as I reached for the phone.  Jairo was outside, waiting for me to go to the church with him.  I threw on clothes, brushed my hair and teeth as quickly as possible, (Tooth brushing still takes me forever with no running water.) grabbed my stuff and headed out the door.

It was so nice to see Eunice sitting at her desk when I got there!  For close to 3 weeks she has spent every day with her son in the hospital.  We hugged her and told her we were happy to see her.  She seemed happy to be back at work, but concerned about her son having to carry a lot of homework after school.  I helped clean out her office, which we had turned into a temporary storage unit when some folks from K2 came and blessed the church with a ton of things for the breakfast program.  I found a place for all of it, and did a little inventory in the meantime.  I am still moving forward as though I will return here after June, so the more I can know about everything, the better.

As soon as I finished, Walter came to buy the food for the breakfast program.  We took off together and did all of the shopping.  He said he can tell I was taking Spanish classes, and not only has my Spanish gotten better, but it is very good!  He said he wants to teach me all of the places to go, since soon this will be my job instead of his.  That is if I come back.  Then I will buy a car here.  Until then it's still his job.

For cheese and eggs we went to a little shop where you stand outside, point at what you want, and pass the money through a hole in a bullet proof window.  Then we went to the equivalent of Costco for cereal, hotdogs, veggies, vegetable oil, and a few other things.  Third we went to a chicken store.  It said, "The Secret of Chicken" on the wall outside.  Walter said we would learn the secret of chicken inside, but I must have missed that.  We bought a huge garbage bag full of random pieces, spent enough money that Walter was able to enter a Mother's Day drawing for a chicken for his mother, and left.  Then we stopped at the strangest store I've ever seen.  Well, I really didn't get to see it because I had to wait in the car.  Imagine a bright orange, two story cement building, with the windows locked down with metal covers.  One window has a hand written sign that lists the store hours.  (They go to lunch from 12-1:30 every day.)  Surrounding the whole building is a sturdy metal fence - not a chain link fence, but like metal bars from the ground to the top of the building.  The fence is also painted bright orange.  There is about a body's width between the fence and the building.  You walk through a door in the metal fence to wait in line until it is your turn at the window and buy whatever it is you need.  We bought rice and beans.  They were out of oatmeal.  There was a big line of people.  I'm not sure if the line was long because of the cheap prices, or because the store was supposed to open at 1:30, but nobody came back from lunch until 2:10.  Welcome to Honduras.  If I didn't love it here, I would hate it.

Tomorrow is the Honduras' Labor Day.  However, it is not a day of relaxation here.  Instead, Jairo asked me to stay inside my house, or Karla and Jose's house, because it will be a dangerous day.  Since so many people don't have jobs it will be a day of protests, or "manifestaciones" as I wrote about so many times during my last visit here.  Jairo and Eunice both are both worried about the protests.  I am hoping everything will be fine because I would like to go watch the guys from the church play fútbol in the evening with Jose.  But I have experience from my last visit about how quickly these things can get out of control.  Today stores closed early so employees could go home and be safe.  I already texted Karla and told her I understand if it is better for me to stay home tomorrow for safety reasons.  As Walter was dropping me off, they almost wouldn't let me into my gated community!  They asked a bunch of questions I've never been asked before, like which block I live on.  There are no street names or addresses here, so I had no idea how to answer that question.  I just told them I live by the church.  They gave us a long once over and finally let us through.  Security is definitely heightened.  But I told Walter they asked that because he has a face that looks like he is up to something.

In the meantime, I have a well stocked fridge, and can stay home as long as necessary.  I have gotten to know Fanny, the lady who lives in the front house, so if I need anything I can always go to her.  She is nice.  I like her.

Oh.  One more thing.  I was telling Walter that the driver told me I could walk to the super.  Walter looked at me like I'm crazy.  He asked if I had asked Jairo about walking to the super.  I said no.  He didn't say anything more, but it was very clear that he believes I should NOT walk to the super.  I wonder if his girlfriend can walk to the super.  She lives nearby.  I don't know if it is dangerous because I am a gringa, or if it is just plain dangerous.  I will not walk to the super.  If I didn't love it here, I would hate it.