Standing up

I had a Wonder Woman sort of day.  Not that I did anything spectacular - it was more about what I stopped doing.

This morning someone asked me to do something that I really couldn't do.  They tried to push me into it, but I didn't give in.  I had prior commitments and it was not something I could cancel or change.  I know the person thought I should have backed out of my prior commitment to do what they wanted me to do, but I also know that I was right to stand my ground.

This afternoon we had Pilates class.  One of the ladies kept talking and talking when we were ready to start class.  I invited her twice to begin with us and finally started class without her.  I think she was a little surprised, but we have to leave the church by 3 p.m. and it is not fair to the others if everyone had a shorter class because one person was standing and talking.

Tonight I got home and was disappointed.  The lady who cleans my house didn't even do the basics.  Again.

In Honduras if you have enough money to feed yourself (and in many cases even if you don't) you help someone else by hiring them to clean your house.  When I first moved here I was shocked to see that everyone had cleaning ladies.  Some even had live in help, when they could barely pay their own rent and put food on the table.  It's kind of a "hand me down" system.  I have a little, so I can give a little to you is the mentality.

I was shocked when I moved into my house in the mountains.  Part of the lease said I would pay for my own cleaning lady.  Did my landlords think I was rich?  In my North American mind if a person hired someone else to clean for them that meant they had at least a little extra money.

Soon after I learned that a young girl from the church just had a baby and needed a job.  She lives nearby and is trustworthy, so I hired her to clean my house for $5 per day - the going rate.  I really liked her.  We made Christmas cookies together and did other little things together to give her an occasional break from cleaning.  She worked with me for almost a year, but then her schedule got too busy.  That was fine.  I can clean my own house.

As soon as my neighbors heard that Cindy was not coming anymore they said they knew someone who needed work and was reliable.  This lady's husband left her and their 2 kids because the lady decided to go to school.  Her husband did not want her to get an education.  That story tugged on my heartstrings, so I said sure.  I will hire her and help her afford to go to school.  (We are talking high school here, not university.)

Well, this lady did not work out as well.  I wrote notes, I left lists, I talked to her and even tried once to fire her but she asked for one more chance.  Today was the end of "one more chance".  I had to let her go.  It was not fun.  I did not like a second of it.  She tried to argue.  But afterward it felt empowering.

So today I stood up for myself.  Three times.  And it felt good.

Oscar Daniel's bruised belly is all better and Milagro didn't mention anything about her tooth hurting.  Kebelin is studying for an English test.  She said, "What will I do while you are gone?????!!!"  That made me feel really good.  She seems to understand her English homework for the first time.  She says she is the only one in her class who understands.  I hope she won't fall behind while I am gone.

All of the ladies continue to improve at Pilates.  Ana can do a sit up now.  Veronica learned how to roll like a ball today.  Delia can do jackknife without me propping up her butt anymore.  And Ada is a power house.  She is the athlete of the group.  I am proud of Ana for sticking with it.  She is the only one who has come to every class.  I know it is really hard for her.  She can't do a lot of what the others do.  But she doesn't give up.  She stays positive.  She says it is getting easier and I can see the improvement.  They are sad that I will be gone and they will miss out on their class over the next few weeks.  They even jokingly suggested that we try a class over Skype.  Instead I will write down a workout plan for them to do at home while I am gone.  I will be curious to see if they follow through without the classes.   It's a lot harder to work out on your own.