Moving on...

This afternoon I had a meeting with the woman who trained me to teach literacy class. I figured it was best to talk to my boss first and discuss the class's most recent developments. I couldn't leave my boss out of the loop.

My boss is a woman of action. Most of the time I appreciate that quality about her. But sometimes the same characteristic that I appreciate is the reason I hesitate to tell her things. I know she will take action. And sometimes I am not ready.

The meeting with the literacy class trainer put me in a time crunch so I decided to get it over with. I called my boss and asked for a meeting, but we ended up working everything out over the phone. In the same conversation she somehow ended up moving me to serve in a different community!

I tell you she is a woman of action. I'm still trying to remember exactly how it all happened. I remember that I was very relieved because she told me that we had to cancel the literacy class, but that the students could continue at a different location within their community if they choose. After that it all becomes a blur.

Remember last week I wrote about wanting to focus on one community? Well, that is exactly what she suggested! I didn't even have to ask. She said effective today I am now full time in one community.

I was surprised, but happy. I told her I think it will be very beneficial to me and to the people I serve. She agreed. She said she loves my work and wants to see me continue to flourish. She emphasized that I should not see this move as limiting, but rather as a chance to grow. (That's exactly what I wrote about here four days ago!)

I had to call my coworker and tell her that I will no longer be running the club with her. My coworker was not happy. She said she is going to talk to our boss because she needs my help. I know she can handle the club on her own, but I told her that if our boss changes her mind I will be happy to continue to work with her.

My boss said possibly I will run a club on my own. I told her the problems I am experiencing in the communities right now, with people thinking that I am there to give them things for free. I also said that I believe my Spanish skills are lacking. She said she will look into Spanish classes for me! She also understands completely what I mean about my skin tone affecting the way I am received in the community. She said for now I will have plenty of other ways I can use the gifts God blessed me with, so I shouldn't worry about running my own club.

Hooray!!!! This is exactly what I was hoping and praying for. God answered my prayer in only four days! My Heavenly Father spoils me.

Speaking of being spoiled, I received feedback from the lady who is in charge of the literacy program. She has been to the class and met the students. She knows our dynamic. She told me I did a very good job and thanked me for serving the people of this country. She could tell I was sad. I think she believed I was blaming myself for the class ending so abruptly. I was able to explain that I am sad for my students. I want the best for them. I want them to be successful.

Three times she told me, "Ignorance is suicide." She said she sees it all of the time. People have an opportunity to better themselves, but they don't due to their own ignorance.

She also told me that I may have coddled my students. She is right. In my attempt to love them and help them, I spoiled them. I tried to do too much of the work for them. I didn't let them struggle enough.

Basically, I did exactly what I always preach against in this blog.

I didn't give them material things, but I did disempower them. I passed by each of their doors and reminded them to come to class each week. They were never allowed the opportunity to show up (or fail to show up) on their own. When they said they didn't do their homework, I tried to be understanding. There should have been a consequence.

I'm not blaming myself for the class ending the way it did, but my students needed to learn about responsibility and commitment. I didn't fully allow them to experience those things. In my effort to be loving and caring, I robbed them of a learning experience. From this point on, it is my fault if I coddle people. Today I learned that just because I am not giving away material things, doesn't automatically mean I am treating people in the most healthy way.

On my way home from the meeting I had the opportunity to talk with some of the drivers and security guards. They all asked if I was going to class. Although they would never say so, I know they don't really like to drive up there. The road is so rutted from rain that it has ruined one four wheel drive truck. The rain washed out the sides of the road so much there is just barely enough room for a car to squeeze through. There is no space to pass if another car approaches from the opposite direction. It's a driver's nightmare. But they are all good sports about it.

Today I told them they will not have to drive me to class anymore. I asked if they were glad. Very seriously, they said no they are not glad.

Sometimes I talk their ears off, especially on the way home from class when I am excited about something that happened that day. They know about the struggles and all of our successes in the class. They said they know how much I loved that class and how much it was benefiting the people I served. Although the road is horrible, they are not happy that the class is cancelled.

We had a long talk about education and its importance. Then we had a long talk about God and how He calls us to serve. The security guards reminded me that God tells us to love our neighbor, but He also tells us not to spoil anyone. It was a nice opportunity to get to know the drivers and guards on a different level - outside of their cars when they are not focused on their work.

One undercover police officer came over and asked what was going on. He could tell something was up and asked if I were moving back to the United States. I tell you, that is what everyone assumes. Before I had a chance to answer they all spoke up, "No! She is not going anywhere!" said a security guard.

"She loves it here. She is almost Honduran," a driver joked.

Then one of the drivers said, "You've just got to dye your hair darker and (he motioned broadening his arms and shoulders) get a little more stout so you look Honduran," he joked.

I really love the organization where I serve, but today I appreciated it even more than usual. I love that my boss is a woman of action. She answered my prayers without even knowing it. I love that she made sure my students will have a place to continue their education if they choose. I also love that I will be able to focus on one community from now on. And I think that it's super cool that I can stand outside the office and talk to the drivers and security guards about God and how we should serve Him.

For the rest of this week I will be at a retreat for English speaking women in a beautiful spot outside of the city. It's all free! A team from the US comes down each year and pampers us for three days. Female missionaries from all over Honduras are given the opportunity for rest, renewal, and worship in our native language. It's super nice. This year I am most looking forward to getting out of the city for a little while, but in the past it has been a life changing experience.