Today is a very sad day. I was awake until late last night watching the news about Alfredo Villatoro's death. He was Catholic. The Catholic Church across the street sang until 1 am last night. I believe it was in reverence to Alfredo Villatoro. They had long services at Easter, but never that late.
I was afraid there would be violent protests in the streets today, so I woke up early and started watching the news again. There was no violence, only immense sadness. As I was lying in bed a helicopter flew overhead and reminded me of the last time I lived here.
For those of you who don't know, I lived in Honduras in 2009 when the president was breaking the constitution. Therefore, he was removed from his bed early one morning and taken out of the country. Most educated people were very happy this happened. They were pleased with the interim president. But the poorer, less educated people were very angry and had horrible protests or "manifestaciones". It was scary. The water and power were turned off. When the power came back on only one radio station was available. They announced a 24 hour curfew or "toque de queda ". Anyone on the street while the toque de queda was in place was arrested. Eventually the toque de queda was reduced so you could leave the house for a few hours in the afternoon, then it was from 8 am-6 pm so people could go to work. Sometimes they would hear about building manifestaciones, so they would play a national song on the tv and announce the toque de queda was pushed back to 4pm. Then people would have to hurry to get back into their houses before 4 pm. There were bombings and shootings and lots of marches with everything in the path of the march destroyed. It was bad. I could always tell what kind of a day it was going to be by the amount of helicopters I could hear in the sky when I woke up.
This morning I heard a helicopter and I did not like it one bit. Crazy how sounds can bring back emotions. But it was only one helicopter. The news was more focused on a teachers strike. It seems to me that the teachers here are always on strike. The first time I visited they were striking because they hadn't been paid in 2 months. (Understandable) The next year when I visited they were striking because the same president who didn't pay them the year before (and hoarded the country's money in his residence) was taken out of the country. They are state employees, so I guess that made sense to them, but... Today they are striking for a pay raise. They will strike again tomorrow, which means we will have a lot of kids at the breakfast program. This morning we had 59 in the early group.
Jairo came to pick me up. We looked everywhere for a newspaper, but every newsstand in the city was empty and abandoned. My mind was still in scared mode, so I initially thought the newspaper wasn't printed, but Jairo explained the papers are all sold out! That was strange. I saw a front page on the news. It said "DOLOR", which means "PAIN". Last week's paper said "LIBERTAD (FREE) ALREDO VILLATORO" in bold across the whole cover. When I saw that cover last week I remember praying that the cover would be an indication of the outcome. This was not the ending anyone had hoped for.
Jairo told me that the latest news is that there was never a ransom request at all. It seems more politically motivated, possibly as a result of a recent drug bust. Another clue that it could have been politically motivated was the red towel on his face and the red socks on his feet. Red is the color of the extreme right winged people. Jairo also said authorities were closing in on the kidnappers last night, right before Alfredo Villatoro was killed.
Lourdes was at a special presentation at Aaron's school, but she came down later. When I got to the church I had big plans for the 100's of hot dog buns and mustard that were donated yesterday. The kitchen was full of women. Hot dogs were already boiled to an odd color and even odder shapes which I can't even describe. The mustard was mixed with mayonaise, as is traditional here. There was shredded cabbage in a bowl and everyone was talking about what to do with it. My vote was to throw it on the grill. Then we could toss the hot dogs on too, to give them some flavor and texture. I was outvoted. The cabbage was sauteed. Lourdes found jars of pickles from the donations and we sliced them into tiny spears. Jacky spread a thick coating of the mayo/mustard on both sides. I added the odd looking hot dogs two slices of pickles and ketchup. Then, the woman who taught me to make pupusas yesterday added the cooked cabbage. She insisted that I add more ketchup on top. She is very bossy to me in the kitchen, but she is an older woman so I must always be quiet and obey. She made a big deal, saying over and over to the other women that I had thrown out the bags the hot dog rolls came in. She picked them out of the garbage. I realized I had made a mistake, but didn't understand why she had to make such a big deal about it. In the end they used one plastic bag to catch a fly and asphyxiate it. I think the rest got thrown away.
The kids got Craisens to take home with them, which was a nice treat. One of my favorite little guys (Misael) got his baby toenail ripped off, along with part of the skin of his toe. Another boy, bigger, kicked him. His mom, whom I adore, and I doctored him up as he screamed in pain. She works in the kitchen almost every day. She is a really hard worker, but she is also a lot of fun. When I first met her I thought she was one of the kids, but she is 26 years old. She has lupus, but it is under control right now. Her daughter is the one who has plans to be a pastor. Her kids are hard workers too.
I had to be extremely firm with one of the girls today, which was sad. Often she eats alone. She can be very mean, but is also frequently picked on. We try to help her socialize, but it is a struggle. Anyway, I looked up while bandaging Misael and there was a shoving match going on. I try not to raise my voice because of the trauma some of these kids suffer at home. So I got up and walked over calmly. I told them very firmly if they did not stop they would not be allowed to play the game. Everyone else stopped and started blaming each other. I said, as I always do, that I don't want them to blame each other. If they cannot play nicely, they cannot use the game. At that point the girl shoved a boy. I stepped between them and she kicked me! I told her calmly and softly that she cannot play the game today. She can play tomorrow, but not today. Then she cursed, which set the other kids off. I put my arm around her and reminded her that she has a choice. She can play another game and use appropriate language or she can choose to leave. She stood her ground for a while, but finally walked away. A minute later I saw her leaving. I felt bad. I don't know if she will eat today. But I also know she understands the rules and we do not allow fighting or bad words. I had to remind myself that it was her choice to leave as I watched her walk away.
We got done early because the kids didn't have to take showers for school, since it was closed. After the kids left I checked my email and found the financial update I've been waiting for. There were 2 new donations, which I appreciate, but no new monthly donations. I talked to Lourdes about the idea that when she leaves in 3 weeks to visit the states, I may not see her again - at least not as soon as we are hoping. Lourdes, the kids and I are still praying that I can live in Honduras, but now we are adding a lot more emphasis on "if it is God's will". If God wants me to serve here, He will be sure I have the finances. One time donations help me do extra things for the kids, but only monthly donations allow me to have a budget to live here.
I vowed not to watch the news when I got home. The news does nothing but upset me, so I am going to keep busy in other ways. Tonight I watched stupid sitcoms. I'm not ashamed to admit it. When you live in a country with so much sadness and hurting, sometimes you need a few stupid sitcoms. It can get really overwhelming when the violence and negativity seems endless. In a poll on the Honduran morning news today, 75% of the people said they do not believe the violence will end. It got to me today. How do these people live like this every day? How do they see a body on tv and not wonder if it is someone they know, when the violence hits so close to home constantly?
Tonight the same announcement they used to announce the toque de queda came on the tv. Ughhh! I heard it so many times when I lived here before and it was always bad news. I got nervous, wondering what was happening, thinking about how much food and water I have in the house. But it was the president saying that swift action will be taken and violence will not be accepted. He assured people that the killers of Alfredo Villatoro will be found. However, I can't help but think of the statistic I saw back when I lived in the states. 90% of murders in Honduras are never solved according to CNN presents "Honduras: The Deadliest Region on Earth".
As much as I want to be here, as much as I love it here, it would be very hard to live with the things these people face every day. Jairo has been trying to tell me. He has so many stories as he drives through the city pointing out various corners where innocent members of the church were shot and killed. I listen to the stories. I think about how terrible it is, but I haven't FELT the pain until now. Honduran people have been living like this, with things only seeming to get worse and worse, since I left 3 years ago. My heart aches today.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
WHY?
Tonight as I was writing my blog for the day, I was also watching the news. They had a breaking story that a body had been found on the side of a road in a zone where there was construction, but not very inhabited. I was going to comment in my blog that I still have a hard time adjusting to the way news is covered outside of the US. When I was in Thailand, I saw things on the news that are never shown in the US - dead bodies namely. It is the same in Central America.
Tonight they showed a man with a red towel over his face. He was also dressed in red socks. He wore a special camoflage uniform that is specific to highly trained, tactical units of the police called "Cobras". His body was lying on the pavement, at the side of a road. You could clearly see where a bullet had entered the side of his head. Blood was running down the street.
After seeing all of the dead bodies in the newspaper today, I really didn't think much about who it was. I only thought about the way nothing was cushioned, or presented in a more gentle way. It was so brutal and all of it was right there, whether you wanted to see it or not. (I'm thinking people outside of the US are accustomed to seeing the news presented this way, so it was probably not as impactful to them.)
Now an hour and 1/2 later, I am watching the news again. They just announced the body was that of Alfredo Villatoro, the famous radio journalist. I know there are many, many people in this country who are sad right now. It's like the bad guys won. The press is emphasizing what an amazing man he was. "Un buen Hondureño" I texted Jairo to be sure he knows. It will effect the church because he was the co-host of a radio show with a man from the church. They hosted the most famous radio show in Honduras together for the past 20 years.
I am going to take time now to pray for his family others who cared about him. The kids at the Breakfast Program are going to be sad tomorrow. They know him as a radio personality their mothers' listen to. They also have been praying for his safety every day since he was kidnapped. There is too much sadness and pain already in this country.
Another senseless death. WHY?
Tonight they showed a man with a red towel over his face. He was also dressed in red socks. He wore a special camoflage uniform that is specific to highly trained, tactical units of the police called "Cobras". His body was lying on the pavement, at the side of a road. You could clearly see where a bullet had entered the side of his head. Blood was running down the street.
After seeing all of the dead bodies in the newspaper today, I really didn't think much about who it was. I only thought about the way nothing was cushioned, or presented in a more gentle way. It was so brutal and all of it was right there, whether you wanted to see it or not. (I'm thinking people outside of the US are accustomed to seeing the news presented this way, so it was probably not as impactful to them.)
Now an hour and 1/2 later, I am watching the news again. They just announced the body was that of Alfredo Villatoro, the famous radio journalist. I know there are many, many people in this country who are sad right now. It's like the bad guys won. The press is emphasizing what an amazing man he was. "Un buen Hondureño" I texted Jairo to be sure he knows. It will effect the church because he was the co-host of a radio show with a man from the church. They hosted the most famous radio show in Honduras together for the past 20 years.
I am going to take time now to pray for his family others who cared about him. The kids at the Breakfast Program are going to be sad tomorrow. They know him as a radio personality their mothers' listen to. They also have been praying for his safety every day since he was kidnapped. There is too much sadness and pain already in this country.
Another senseless death. WHY?
Pupusas, Proud Boys and Problems
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| Weeds? Or herbs? |
Despite everyone being sleepy today we worked hard in the kitchen. I had watched Karla make pupusas when I lived here 3 years ago. She always makes everything look easy. Today when I got to the church they had a huge bowl of dough, shredded cheese that must have had eggs or milk to moisten it, and bowls of carrots, cabbage, onions, and cilantro. When we ran out of cilantro they brought something that looked to me like regular weeds. They made 2 toppings which are very traditional in Central America. One is vinegar, cabbage, carrots and some seasoning. The other is vinegar with onions, cilantro, and jalapeños. People add other veggies/seasonings to their own taste.
Since they were thinly slicing everything (in the states we would have used a grater, but here it was all done by hand) I figured my best bet was to steer clear of the veggies. So I helped roll the dough into balls. We ended up with about 200 balls of dough, but there were lots of kids today because they have been looking forward to pupusa day since last week.
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| Dough being rolled into balls of dough, and the beans mixed with cheese |
We flattened each ball of dough into a little tortilla, then spread a mixture of refried beans and cheese onto it with our finger, the same way you would spread pizza sauce onto pizza dough, leaving the edges dry. Then you fold the edges in toward the middle until it is almost shaped like a ball again. Then you flatten it again, trying not to make any cracks for the filling to leak out, but it happens anyway. From there they get slapped on a griddle until golden brown and served with the cabbage topping. Most of the kids chose the spicy jalapeño/onion topping too.
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| Stacking plates so everything is ready when prayer time is over and hands are washed 39 kids in the morning group today! |
First I ate four pupusas for lunch. Then I sat down for an afternoon snack with Jairo and ate two more. My tummy is FULL!
I am starting to really feel connected with the kids now. I have always cared for them, but now that I have had time to know them more as individuals, I am able to appreciate them even more.
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| Proud boys with new haircuts and a new trophy! |
The boys showed up with their new haircuts and with a trophy they won in their soccer league. I need to ask them more about their league tomorrow because I didn't understand that the trophy was something they had really earned. I thought they were just joking because they kept calling it the World Cup. They wanted their pictures taken with it, but I still thought it was a joke until Lourdes told me later about the local league. I will have to ask them more about it tomorrow and tell them how awesome they are for winning it!
A lady came today and cut the girls' hair, but I didn't get many photos because I was in the kitchen cooking.
I got to show a mommy photos I took at my first week of church when Jairo did her son's blessing. She loved the pictures. I wish I had a printer every day because most of these people do not have any photos of their families. When I get the chance, I show them on my computer, but I wish I could give them a copy to take home with them. They love just to see the photo on my computer.
Last night I was watching the news and saw that a school was closed. Today I learned it was Karlita's school. Karlita is a very special girl. She wants to be a teacher and takes her studies very seriously. She is incredible with the kids. She has the perfect blend of kindness and firmness in her tiny little body. She is a hard worker but is still lots of fun. She goes above and beyond to learn everything she can get her hands on. She is constantly asking me phrases in English. I need to make a conscious effort to teach her new things every day because she is so eager to learn. Also she is taking piano lessons at the church from one of the older girls. I admire her motivation.
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| Karlita cooking pupusas |
Karlita (to separate her from the many other Karlas) explained to me that the students of the high school are protesting. Last night I thought the alumni were protesting, because the word for word for students is "alumnos" but today she explained that they pay an annual amount to the school for busing, but bus rates have gone up and some people travel from far away, so they have to pay an additional amount each day to get to school. She said for her it is not much, but for others it is a LOT. It is kind of like a student strike, trying to get the school to change the policy of having to pay the annual fee and additional costs on top. Karla is anxious to get back to her classes.
I read an article today about the man who was kidnapped - Alfredo Villatodo. It was an editorial, pleading with the kidnappers to spare his life and give him back to his children and wife. It talked about Mr. Villatodo being a man who came from nothing and fought hard to become a successful radio journalist. It also said that being a successful journalist does not mean that he has very much money. It talked a lot about how well respected he is, but that his value is because of the man he is, not his bank account. Apparently the kidnappers are asking the family for a lot of money that simply doesn't exist. The editorial talked about how much this country needs to change.
***Please read the addendum to this post which was written at 10:30 tonight entitled "WHY?".***
MLFHonduras.Blogspot.com
I read an article about the man who was charged with the rapes. So far he has more than 20 rape charges. It said exactly as Jairo told me, that he raped many girls between the ages of 9-16 (hearing the ages bothered me even more) and that accusations continue to be made against him every day. How does someone get away with this for so long? I also read about the father of two boys from our church. I met the two boys last week when they were with my friend Karla. Their father arrended the church a long time ago. He was arrested at the border for terrorism with lots of weapons and evidence of plots to kill people. He has a long history of this, but was released because they didn't follow the proper protocol when arresting him. He will still be investigated and probably arrested again, but for now he is free. I feel bad for his wife and his children.
I am continuing to pray I will be able to raise funds to live here, but I do feel frustrated that I can't do simple things like watch the amazing choir at the Catholic church directly across the street from my house because I could be kidnapped. I listen to them every night from inside twelve foot walls, topped with rolls of barbed wire, that surround my house. It is not fair but it is necessary. I do understand. I am grateful that I have people here who care for me and make sure I am safe. I have no frustration toward the fact that I have rules. I do have frustration toward the people whose violent behavior make the rules necessary. I spend a lot of evenings reading, writing this blog, watching tv, or praying and reflecting because once the sun goes down by 6 pm, I have to stay inside.
I guess that makes my time at the breakfast program even more special. I appreciate my time with others more. Generally, I am a person who likes a lot of time alone. I am also very independent. These violent people are cramping my style! : ) But my style will stay cramped and I will do as Jairo recommends so that I am safe. Even with all of these restrictions, I hope I can stay here. In Honduras I feel alive. I feel like I am exactly where I am supposed to be, which is a feeling I don't get anywhere else. I experience life more intensely and I live more intentionally. I love it here!
My Mom hates it when I write about this stuff. It is so hard for her to hear - you can imagine. But the purpose of my blog is to share this experience with others and to keep memories for myself. So, sorry Mom, or Aunts or anyone who may be upset by reading this. I am safe. If a time comes when I can't be safe, or when I feel too cramped, or if I no longer feel called to serve here (or if I can't raise the money to stay here) then I will come home. Until then, I am living in a country where the fact is that violence is rampant. But I am sheltered and coddled and happy and here.
Thank you so much for reading!
Monday, May 14, 2012
Waf-lays and Haircuts
This morning I was still riding high from having such an excellent day yesterday. When I got in the car to go to the breakfast program I thanked Lourdes and Jairo again for letting me spend the day with them. I really am so grateful.
We stopped on the way to the church and got donuts which was strange because we have never done that before and I was craving donuts this morning, which is unusual for me. Today was we made "waf-lays" (waffles). There were less kids than usual, maybe because it was a rainy morning. They had tons of the rice left from Mothers Day yesterday at the church. The kids had seconds and we still had more!
I took 76 pictures today. It was haircut day. A boy I remember from 3 years ago has grown up to be a barber. Lourdes told me he was one of the first kids she ever brought into the church from Los Pinos. What a success story! He accepted Christ the first time K2 came for VBS and has been an active member of the church ever since. He came to Lourdes a few months ago and said that he would like to give back to the church by cutting hair for people who can't afford haircuts.
He had a long line today. Over 10 kids waited for haircuts. He took his time and gave each boy a special, unique haircut. He has the bib and everything. First he cuts it all down, then he puts shaving cream around the edges and shapes it all up, then he pulls out the scissors and gives them each a professional cut. I took a lot of photos. It was so nice to see boys who didn't want their picture taken at first, stand so proud and tall in the end. Then I showed them the pictures of themselves and they would comment on how handsome they look. I love seeing them feel happy and self confident. They don't feel that way often.
I also had some extra time with Jairo and Lourdes today. Jairo gave me a few things he wants me to write for the church. He also asked if he could look at the pictures I've taken since I got here. We looked through all of them. He loves pictures. Lourdes sat with us for a while. I showed them pictures of my annual camping trip in Telluride with my brother and his family. Lourdes loved the scenery of Colorado and pics of my nephews. She said she could see why it was such a fun, relaxing event and an important tradition to keep.
I asked Jairo about the radio host who was kidnapped. He said there is no news about him. Everyone is praying he is still alive. He also updated me about a 15 year old girl from the church. She was kidnapped on the way home from school and raped on the day I arrived here. Her rapist was captured 2 days ago. He has already been charged with rape in the past. At the time she was raped there were more than 40 people who claimed to have been raped by him! More and more people continue to come forth to say they were raped by him. There is even someone who wrote from Spain! Jairo said he wonders why he hasn't been permanently jailed before. But now that it seems certain he will be jailed... Jairo paused. I said they will kill him in jail, won't they? He nodded. He said they will rape him first. Both of us were quiet. I was thinking about the torture he will probably endure and wondered how long they will keep him alive. Jairo just said we will hear about him in the news. I guess it is really great news that this horrible man is finally off the streets.
Here are some cute fotos I took today:
We stopped on the way to the church and got donuts which was strange because we have never done that before and I was craving donuts this morning, which is unusual for me. Today was we made "waf-lays" (waffles). There were less kids than usual, maybe because it was a rainy morning. They had tons of the rice left from Mothers Day yesterday at the church. The kids had seconds and we still had more!
I took 76 pictures today. It was haircut day. A boy I remember from 3 years ago has grown up to be a barber. Lourdes told me he was one of the first kids she ever brought into the church from Los Pinos. What a success story! He accepted Christ the first time K2 came for VBS and has been an active member of the church ever since. He came to Lourdes a few months ago and said that he would like to give back to the church by cutting hair for people who can't afford haircuts.
He had a long line today. Over 10 kids waited for haircuts. He took his time and gave each boy a special, unique haircut. He has the bib and everything. First he cuts it all down, then he puts shaving cream around the edges and shapes it all up, then he pulls out the scissors and gives them each a professional cut. I took a lot of photos. It was so nice to see boys who didn't want their picture taken at first, stand so proud and tall in the end. Then I showed them the pictures of themselves and they would comment on how handsome they look. I love seeing them feel happy and self confident. They don't feel that way often.
I also had some extra time with Jairo and Lourdes today. Jairo gave me a few things he wants me to write for the church. He also asked if he could look at the pictures I've taken since I got here. We looked through all of them. He loves pictures. Lourdes sat with us for a while. I showed them pictures of my annual camping trip in Telluride with my brother and his family. Lourdes loved the scenery of Colorado and pics of my nephews. She said she could see why it was such a fun, relaxing event and an important tradition to keep.
I asked Jairo about the radio host who was kidnapped. He said there is no news about him. Everyone is praying he is still alive. He also updated me about a 15 year old girl from the church. She was kidnapped on the way home from school and raped on the day I arrived here. Her rapist was captured 2 days ago. He has already been charged with rape in the past. At the time she was raped there were more than 40 people who claimed to have been raped by him! More and more people continue to come forth to say they were raped by him. There is even someone who wrote from Spain! Jairo said he wonders why he hasn't been permanently jailed before. But now that it seems certain he will be jailed... Jairo paused. I said they will kill him in jail, won't they? He nodded. He said they will rape him first. Both of us were quiet. I was thinking about the torture he will probably endure and wondered how long they will keep him alive. Jairo just said we will hear about him in the news. I guess it is really great news that this horrible man is finally off the streets.
Here are some cute fotos I took today:
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| Don Juan gave out toothpaste |
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| Sometimes haircuts tickle! |
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| I liked this look. |
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| Before |
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| During |
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| After! Standing proud and tall. |
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| Have you ever seen such great looking kids? |
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Mothers Day in Honduras Rocks!
Today was awesome! In Honduras the people know how to celebrate Mothers. I hope that no matter where I am in the future, I always take the time and put forth the effort to celebrate Mothers the way I learned today.
I knew Mother's Day is a big deal here. I've been hearing about it for weeks from the kids as they work to prepare. So I made sure to greet each mother in the car with a special mother's day greeting. When we got to the church it was all decorated in pinks and purples with new flowers. Everyone gave extra Mothers Day hugs and took extra time to settle in as two teens opened up the service (Evelin Michelle's brother, Ricky, and the son of the radio journalists I wrote about last week). The boys did a great job introducing each of the opening songs, reading tributes that other teens had written for their mothers, and saying sweet things to their own mothers. The girls from the breakfast program performed the dance they have been practicing with me for 2 weeks. They were nervous, but looked very pretty.
Then Eunice's daughter, Elienai, gave the message. Elienai did a great job too. She spoke about the bible's definition of a woman, then a mother, then the role of children and how they should respect their mother. She used a lot of scripture, as well as heart felt words to illustrate her point.
Jairo later told me that the jovenes (teens) have been working hard to prepare for this day since January! He said he gives them free reign. Sometimes they come to him with questions but this day is all theirs.
In the end people got up and spoke of/to their mothers. Husbands also spoke of their wives as mothers. It was so sweet. At the very end a stunningly beautiful woman (I was dying to know her age. I'm guessing 80's.) stood and recited a poem about women vs men. The poem was as beautiful as the woman. It was very, very long. She had memorized it and practiced just for this occasion. It was an honor to be in that place at that moment.
Jose asked every mother to remain seated. He asked the men to help pull out tables and asked friends and children to help serve food. We had a fried rice dish with fantastic horchata. It was cool to see the men serving horchata. The kids had big trays to carry plates of food. They did a great job of serving everyone quickly. Moms were all dressed up and sat enjoying lunch with their families. It was cool to see how the families from Los Pinos have become an intregal part of the church community. I remember times when they would come and stand by the gate, or back by the offices, but not come forward into the church without coaxing. Now they seem at home and their children are working side by side with kids who grew up in the church. I like it a lot!
I finally really felt at home after the service. I didn't have to stand and think about who to talk to or what to say. I was a social butterfly - serving and wishing mothers "Felicidades". Three tables invited me to sit with them, so I spent some time at each. It was really nice.
As we were leaving I talked with the Seamans. They are very active members of the church, as well as the owners of my house. Their teen aged daughters attend a bilingual school and speak excellent English. They were asking me if I am bilingual. I said I have been wondering the same thing! I don't know how to define bilingual. They said they think I am definitely bilingual, and they wish they were as well. To me, they are easily bilingual. They are feeling a lack of confidence right now because they are studying the SATs and finding the English difficult. We laughed about the "troubles" a bilingual person faces - thinking, singing, dreaming, watching tv in more than one language can all get confusing.
On the way home Jairo asked if I would like to go to his sister's house. I said sure! He said we had to go to his house to cook first, then we'd go to his sister's house. Sounded great to me. I don't have anything else to do. And I had been missing the quality time I used to spend with Lourdes and Jairo.
We cooked, then Jairo and I talked about Mother's Day in Honduras and some of the other cultural differences I have noticed. At dinner time we headed out. It was a gorgeous drive through the mountains past lots of cool sights. Of course there were the usual brightly colored houses, precariously perched on the side of mountains, horses wandering in the street, a spot that smelled funny and was full of huge vultures, and a girl in her pajamas playing with a man (who I'd guess was her father) in a small garbage dump.
We pulled up to a gated community and I learned why Jairo had stopped at a little place few miles back to buy friend chicken. (We already had a car full of food.) As the guards greeted him and went to open the gate he called them over. They were confused. He told them "Happy Mothers' Day! You are not mothers, but you have mothers, no?" and he gave them meals of chicken and soda. He had told me earlier that most people don't have to work Friday afternoon before Mother's Day and the only places open on Mother's Day are restaurants. It's like a national holiday! So he felt bad for the guards who couldn't be with their mothers today and brought them a special treat.
We arrive at Jairo's sister's house where his entire family was present, except one brother who is in Argentina right now. I got to meet his sister for whom we have been praying since I got here. She has cancer. She had to make a trip to the emergency room last night, but is feeling better today. She said it was nice because the young doctors at the hospital recognized her as a nurse who had taught them when they were in school, so she got very special and immediate treatment.
I had the opportunity to talk to Jairo's sister, Ruth, who really changed my life 3 years ago when she spoke to me about the words God had put in her heart for me. She remembered meeting me and was so happy to hear that the words had been helpful. I have waited so long to be able to tell her, it felt great! She has a church outside of the city. Jairo said any time I want to go to her church I can always go. I could even ride with his brother, who lives a few blocks from my house. I will probably visit her church soon. She is blessed with many special gifts from God and it is very interesting to visit her church.
I had fun talking and joking with Jairo's mother and brother. Everyone made me feel at home. Lourdes' Mom was with us. She made sure everyone only spoke to me in Spanish. Even when they asked if they could practice their English with me. They were told firmly that they can speak in English, but I must speak Spanish. She is always willing to help if I get stuck, but Lourdes' mother has made it her personal mission to keep all English out of my vocabulary.
I rambled away in my usual fashion, feeling pretty good about my Spanish, with a house full of new people. I also spent some quality time with Lourdes' sister, Belinda. I haven't had time with her since I lived in her house when I first arrived here and my luggage was lost. It was really nice to catch up with her. She was able to give me some personal advice about the transition I am facing in the next few weeks as I learn whether or not I will live in Honduras permanently.
Finally it was time to go. I wished all of the mothers a Happy Mother's Day, hugged them all and thanked them for sharing the day with me. Then I got a ride home with Jairo's brother. He reminds me a lot of Jairo. He is easy to get along with and funny. He helped create the colonia where I live and was one of the first people to live here 27 years ago. If I need to buy a car here, he will help.
I got home and called my own mother for the second time today, just to tell her what a great day I had. Even though she is far away, I felt like I was able to share this amazing day with her. I wish my mother could experience a Honduran Mother's Day. Hondurans know how to do Mother's Day right! I will never forget this day.
I knew Mother's Day is a big deal here. I've been hearing about it for weeks from the kids as they work to prepare. So I made sure to greet each mother in the car with a special mother's day greeting. When we got to the church it was all decorated in pinks and purples with new flowers. Everyone gave extra Mothers Day hugs and took extra time to settle in as two teens opened up the service (Evelin Michelle's brother, Ricky, and the son of the radio journalists I wrote about last week). The boys did a great job introducing each of the opening songs, reading tributes that other teens had written for their mothers, and saying sweet things to their own mothers. The girls from the breakfast program performed the dance they have been practicing with me for 2 weeks. They were nervous, but looked very pretty.
Then Eunice's daughter, Elienai, gave the message. Elienai did a great job too. She spoke about the bible's definition of a woman, then a mother, then the role of children and how they should respect their mother. She used a lot of scripture, as well as heart felt words to illustrate her point.
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| All of the Madres as the rest of the church prays a blessing over them |
Jairo later told me that the jovenes (teens) have been working hard to prepare for this day since January! He said he gives them free reign. Sometimes they come to him with questions but this day is all theirs.
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| Jose amd Dana Sophia honoring Karla |
In the end people got up and spoke of/to their mothers. Husbands also spoke of their wives as mothers. It was so sweet. At the very end a stunningly beautiful woman (I was dying to know her age. I'm guessing 80's.) stood and recited a poem about women vs men. The poem was as beautiful as the woman. It was very, very long. She had memorized it and practiced just for this occasion. It was an honor to be in that place at that moment.
Jose asked every mother to remain seated. He asked the men to help pull out tables and asked friends and children to help serve food. We had a fried rice dish with fantastic horchata. It was cool to see the men serving horchata. The kids had big trays to carry plates of food. They did a great job of serving everyone quickly. Moms were all dressed up and sat enjoying lunch with their families. It was cool to see how the families from Los Pinos have become an intregal part of the church community. I remember times when they would come and stand by the gate, or back by the offices, but not come forward into the church without coaxing. Now they seem at home and their children are working side by side with kids who grew up in the church. I like it a lot!
I finally really felt at home after the service. I didn't have to stand and think about who to talk to or what to say. I was a social butterfly - serving and wishing mothers "Felicidades". Three tables invited me to sit with them, so I spent some time at each. It was really nice.
As we were leaving I talked with the Seamans. They are very active members of the church, as well as the owners of my house. Their teen aged daughters attend a bilingual school and speak excellent English. They were asking me if I am bilingual. I said I have been wondering the same thing! I don't know how to define bilingual. They said they think I am definitely bilingual, and they wish they were as well. To me, they are easily bilingual. They are feeling a lack of confidence right now because they are studying the SATs and finding the English difficult. We laughed about the "troubles" a bilingual person faces - thinking, singing, dreaming, watching tv in more than one language can all get confusing.
On the way home Jairo asked if I would like to go to his sister's house. I said sure! He said we had to go to his house to cook first, then we'd go to his sister's house. Sounded great to me. I don't have anything else to do. And I had been missing the quality time I used to spend with Lourdes and Jairo.
We cooked, then Jairo and I talked about Mother's Day in Honduras and some of the other cultural differences I have noticed. At dinner time we headed out. It was a gorgeous drive through the mountains past lots of cool sights. Of course there were the usual brightly colored houses, precariously perched on the side of mountains, horses wandering in the street, a spot that smelled funny and was full of huge vultures, and a girl in her pajamas playing with a man (who I'd guess was her father) in a small garbage dump.
We pulled up to a gated community and I learned why Jairo had stopped at a little place few miles back to buy friend chicken. (We already had a car full of food.) As the guards greeted him and went to open the gate he called them over. They were confused. He told them "Happy Mothers' Day! You are not mothers, but you have mothers, no?" and he gave them meals of chicken and soda. He had told me earlier that most people don't have to work Friday afternoon before Mother's Day and the only places open on Mother's Day are restaurants. It's like a national holiday! So he felt bad for the guards who couldn't be with their mothers today and brought them a special treat.
We arrive at Jairo's sister's house where his entire family was present, except one brother who is in Argentina right now. I got to meet his sister for whom we have been praying since I got here. She has cancer. She had to make a trip to the emergency room last night, but is feeling better today. She said it was nice because the young doctors at the hospital recognized her as a nurse who had taught them when they were in school, so she got very special and immediate treatment.
I had the opportunity to talk to Jairo's sister, Ruth, who really changed my life 3 years ago when she spoke to me about the words God had put in her heart for me. She remembered meeting me and was so happy to hear that the words had been helpful. I have waited so long to be able to tell her, it felt great! She has a church outside of the city. Jairo said any time I want to go to her church I can always go. I could even ride with his brother, who lives a few blocks from my house. I will probably visit her church soon. She is blessed with many special gifts from God and it is very interesting to visit her church.
I had fun talking and joking with Jairo's mother and brother. Everyone made me feel at home. Lourdes' Mom was with us. She made sure everyone only spoke to me in Spanish. Even when they asked if they could practice their English with me. They were told firmly that they can speak in English, but I must speak Spanish. She is always willing to help if I get stuck, but Lourdes' mother has made it her personal mission to keep all English out of my vocabulary.
I rambled away in my usual fashion, feeling pretty good about my Spanish, with a house full of new people. I also spent some quality time with Lourdes' sister, Belinda. I haven't had time with her since I lived in her house when I first arrived here and my luggage was lost. It was really nice to catch up with her. She was able to give me some personal advice about the transition I am facing in the next few weeks as I learn whether or not I will live in Honduras permanently.
Finally it was time to go. I wished all of the mothers a Happy Mother's Day, hugged them all and thanked them for sharing the day with me. Then I got a ride home with Jairo's brother. He reminds me a lot of Jairo. He is easy to get along with and funny. He helped create the colonia where I live and was one of the first people to live here 27 years ago. If I need to buy a car here, he will help.
I got home and called my own mother for the second time today, just to tell her what a great day I had. Even though she is far away, I felt like I was able to share this amazing day with her. I wish my mother could experience a Honduran Mother's Day. Hondurans know how to do Mother's Day right! I will never forget this day.
Friday, May 11, 2012
Happy Mothers Day! (Kind of...)
When I got up this morning I thought today was Mothers Day. What do I know? I don't wear a watch, I don't have a calendar, and I don't understand some of what is said around me, so I surmised that today is Mother's Day. I was wrong.
Jairo, Lourdes, Josselyn and Aaron had to wake up early this morning so they could be in line at 6am at the bank to get the kids' passports renewed. They expect to spend the whole day there, so I will take care of everything at the breakfast program today. It is going to be a different kind of day because the kids who have afternoon classes will go to school in the morning with their mothers. Then everyone will be released when they are done with Mother's Day festivities, so we are not sure when they will arrive.
Yesterday there was a huge protest by bus drivers. I only caught the end of it - traffic was messed up when Jairo was trying to get us to the church. But from watching the news last night it was much worse earlier in the morning. The buses parked in the middle of every main street, blocking all of the main roads so the traffic couldn't pass. It was a peaceful protest with no violence. The bus drivers want to raise the rates but nobody is in support because they can barely afford the rates now. I have been on buses twice this visit. Both times it cost 11 Limpiras. That is about $2.00 in the US. I'm not sure if different buses cost more or less, but I do know there are a LOT of buses here. Most are old US school buses, but they are used for public transportation. And I have noticed there are 2 basic kinds of school buses. One has bible scripture painted across the top of the windshield and stickers about God on the back. The other kind of bus say something like "Playboy" across the top of the windshield and has stickers of women or marijuana on the back. I always see them parked at the bottom of the hill by the church. The buses here are washed constantly. I'm not sure why it is so important to have shiny tires on the buses. Maybe if they spent less time washing the buses they could make more money.
The front page of the newspapers yesterday said 3 huge words - FREE ALFONZO VILLATODO. Lourdes was reading a huge 2 page spread and I read it over her shoulder on the way to the breakfast program. He was kidnapped from his car. His car was left, parked on the side of the road between his home and work. The kidnappers are holding him hostage for a lot of money. His family is afraid he will be killed if they ask for help from the police, so they are not talking with police. I have been watching news programs on TV, but for some reason I can't find anything on TV about it. Maybe I am watching the wrong channels.
The funny thing is that I was doing laundry before I went to the Breakfast Program this morning. Of course that is my best thinking time, so I was thinking back to Mother's Days in the past when I worked in a lock down facility with boys. Almost none of them had a positive relationship with their mother, so I sometimes (like it or not) played that role. On Mothers Day they would often make cards for me instead of their biological mothers. I always had to wonder about their intentions with the cards. If they were trying to butter me up because they had ulterior motives. It was so wonderful to receive a Mother's Day gift this year that I knew came from a thoughtful heart. Even though I am not sure whose heart it was right now. (MUST find out Monday.)
The kids were super hyper at the breakfast program today, so we prayed, they ate, and we sent them on their way. I rode home with my favorite cabby, Jose. I finally got his phone number after seeing him on the corner a few days ago. Since he has no teeth his "sesenta" sounds just like "setenta" so I had written it down wrong. Now I've got it right. He gave me a ride home, stopping along the way at the grocery store for me, and still charged less than some have asked just for the ride straight home. Plus we have nice little chats. I did a second batch of laundry. Can't call it a load when I don't load it into anything. Now I have the rest of the day to relax. I have a great life! Although this morning when I was wringing out sheets til my hands cramped, I might have said it was just a good life. Most moments it really is great.
I think my neighbors in the front house are coming back home tonight. I am fine when they are gone, but I do prefer having them here. I did yard work so they could come home and find things just as they left. Mango trees are a lot of work! The mangoes are ripening, but they are up so high. I have to figure out a safe way to get some down. I banged on them with a rake and they didn't budge, so I'm guessing they are not quite ready yet. But when they fall it is quite a trick to get to them before the ants do. It felt good to get out there and do some physical work.
Need to run down to the store while it's still daylight and by some limes for my corn on the cobb tonight. Yummy! Then a shower and some reading time in my clean sheets. Sounds like a perfect evening.
Happy preface to Mother's Day -
Jairo, Lourdes, Josselyn and Aaron had to wake up early this morning so they could be in line at 6am at the bank to get the kids' passports renewed. They expect to spend the whole day there, so I will take care of everything at the breakfast program today. It is going to be a different kind of day because the kids who have afternoon classes will go to school in the morning with their mothers. Then everyone will be released when they are done with Mother's Day festivities, so we are not sure when they will arrive.
Yesterday there was a huge protest by bus drivers. I only caught the end of it - traffic was messed up when Jairo was trying to get us to the church. But from watching the news last night it was much worse earlier in the morning. The buses parked in the middle of every main street, blocking all of the main roads so the traffic couldn't pass. It was a peaceful protest with no violence. The bus drivers want to raise the rates but nobody is in support because they can barely afford the rates now. I have been on buses twice this visit. Both times it cost 11 Limpiras. That is about $2.00 in the US. I'm not sure if different buses cost more or less, but I do know there are a LOT of buses here. Most are old US school buses, but they are used for public transportation. And I have noticed there are 2 basic kinds of school buses. One has bible scripture painted across the top of the windshield and stickers about God on the back. The other kind of bus say something like "Playboy" across the top of the windshield and has stickers of women or marijuana on the back. I always see them parked at the bottom of the hill by the church. The buses here are washed constantly. I'm not sure why it is so important to have shiny tires on the buses. Maybe if they spent less time washing the buses they could make more money.
The front page of the newspapers yesterday said 3 huge words - FREE ALFONZO VILLATODO. Lourdes was reading a huge 2 page spread and I read it over her shoulder on the way to the breakfast program. He was kidnapped from his car. His car was left, parked on the side of the road between his home and work. The kidnappers are holding him hostage for a lot of money. His family is afraid he will be killed if they ask for help from the police, so they are not talking with police. I have been watching news programs on TV, but for some reason I can't find anything on TV about it. Maybe I am watching the wrong channels.
****** Evening Update ******
At the breakfast program today, one of the girls gave me a bag of conservas, which happen to be my absolute FAVORITE candies, as a Mother's Day gift. I think everyone was shocked when I started jumping up and down and screaming, "Conservas! Me ENCANTA conservas!!" Here is the embarrassing part. I was so excited by the conservas that I thanked the girl who gave them to me, then immediately forgot who it was! I have to ask on Monday.The funny thing is that I was doing laundry before I went to the Breakfast Program this morning. Of course that is my best thinking time, so I was thinking back to Mother's Days in the past when I worked in a lock down facility with boys. Almost none of them had a positive relationship with their mother, so I sometimes (like it or not) played that role. On Mothers Day they would often make cards for me instead of their biological mothers. I always had to wonder about their intentions with the cards. If they were trying to butter me up because they had ulterior motives. It was so wonderful to receive a Mother's Day gift this year that I knew came from a thoughtful heart. Even though I am not sure whose heart it was right now. (MUST find out Monday.)
The kids were super hyper at the breakfast program today, so we prayed, they ate, and we sent them on their way. I rode home with my favorite cabby, Jose. I finally got his phone number after seeing him on the corner a few days ago. Since he has no teeth his "sesenta" sounds just like "setenta" so I had written it down wrong. Now I've got it right. He gave me a ride home, stopping along the way at the grocery store for me, and still charged less than some have asked just for the ride straight home. Plus we have nice little chats. I did a second batch of laundry. Can't call it a load when I don't load it into anything. Now I have the rest of the day to relax. I have a great life! Although this morning when I was wringing out sheets til my hands cramped, I might have said it was just a good life. Most moments it really is great.
I think my neighbors in the front house are coming back home tonight. I am fine when they are gone, but I do prefer having them here. I did yard work so they could come home and find things just as they left. Mango trees are a lot of work! The mangoes are ripening, but they are up so high. I have to figure out a safe way to get some down. I banged on them with a rake and they didn't budge, so I'm guessing they are not quite ready yet. But when they fall it is quite a trick to get to them before the ants do. It felt good to get out there and do some physical work.
Need to run down to the store while it's still daylight and by some limes for my corn on the cobb tonight. Yummy! Then a shower and some reading time in my clean sheets. Sounds like a perfect evening.
Happy preface to Mother's Day -
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Photos of Chicken Soup Day
Today was chicken soup day!
Making the Soup:
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| Lots of fresh veggies (carrots, cabbage, potato, celery, cilantro) |
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| Lourdes cooking |
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| Marlin serving |
Hygiene
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| "Pasta, por favor" (Toothpaste please) |
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| Me handing out toothpaste and vitamins |
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| Getting dressed after a shower |
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| Clean, fed, and ready for school! |
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
BYOG (Bring Your Own Gun)
Yesterday as I was getting out of the car to go home I asked Jairo how he was doing. He said his liver is enlarged and he has gall stones, but they are not hurting much right now. I was not expecting that reponse. He had to get an EKG this morning. Tomorrow he will go to the doctor to put together all of the results.
When I got to the church today Jairo was already there, finished with his medical appointments. I greeted everyone like normal, but Jairo said, "We are very sad today." I asked, "Why are we sad?" Two Sundays ago at church Jairo introduced me to a woman he said is a journalist here, in Tegucigalpa. When he used the word "journalist" I was curious. I have a degree in journalism, so I wondered what kind of journalist she is. Jairo explained that she is a radio host, but her husband has the most famous morning radio show in all of Honduras. Today Jairo said the co-host of the show was kidnapped at 4 o'clock this morning on his way to work. People are wondering if the man will be killed for voicing his opinions on the radio. Jairo was very concerned and encouraged everyone, including all the kids from the Breakfast Program, to pray hard for this man's life. His name is Alfredo Villatodo. He is not from our church, but the man from our church has been doing a radio show with him for 20 years. I haven't heard any more news about that since about 10 this morning.
Lourdes said she was feeling well today. She said she was tired, but happy to be tired, because that means she will sleep well tonight. She said she did sleep well last night, but went to bed late and had to get up early, so she needed a few more hours of sleep. She is walking with less pain today. She said she is doing yoga at home every night because exercise is as important as her meds for the fibromyalgia.
It was pancake day at the breakfast program. We had about 50 kids in the morning group today. They got out of school early today because they are rehearsing for Mother's Day on Friday. Mother's Day here is a huge deal. The kids have been preparing gifts, dances and other presentations for weeks now. On Friday the mothers are invited to the schools, where the kids say their mothers will be showered with gifts. After the presentation the kids and moms will go home. Can you believe they have a half day of school for Mother's Day? Mothers are appreciated in Honduras!
Lourdes talked to the kids today about what they want to be when they grow up. The most popular choice was fútbolista (professional soccer player). Next were doctors, then police, which surprised me because I thought most people do not respect the police here, as they are known to be very corrupt. There were many who wanted to be teachers, professors, fire fighters, a few lawyers and two want to be president.
I felt a strange contradiction within myself as I listened to the kids' goals and dreams. I have always told kids they can do whatever they set their mind to. When I was working with kids in the US, it usually felt truthful. I would love to say to these kids, "You can do it!" But then I think about where these kids come from. I wonder if it is realistic for these kids to be doctors or lawyers or police officers. I feel ashamed to think that way. It's not right that I should ever doubt what they can be. These amazing kids should be everything they want to be, but it is such a huge leap from their current lives to the lives they dream of. I hope God takes them out of this place and shows them how to reach their goals.
One girl wants to be a pastor. Of them all, I think she is a safe bet. She is a beautiful soul. Her mother has Lupus, so she was born with hair that has a different texture and is very thin. She often wears a hat. I think the purpose of the hat is to protect her skin from the sun, because she seems very comfortable with herself. Her mother helps at the breakfast program often. It is crazy when she, her mother and I are in the same room because our names are so similar. She is Meylin. Her mother is Marlen. It gets very confusing.
Jairo came back from running errands today and told us the craziest story! He has to get Josselyn and Aaron's passports renewed so he went to the bank to set up an appointment. The people at the bank said they don't accept appointments, but they see 30 people per day. They told him to come back and wait in line, but come early because they will only see the first 30 people. As he was leaving, Jairo asked the guards what time he should get there so he is sure to be seen. The guard said to come at 4 a.m. Jairo said this area is not safe. He could not bring his family to stand outside in a line with money and documents. They would be perfect targets for thieves. The guards recommended that they bring guns. Jairo said he can't bring his family to a place where he has to bring a gun for protection. The guards assured him that he could shoot anyone he needed to shoot and they would say they didn't see a thing! Jairo ended up finding a bank in a better part of the city where he will have to be in line at 6am with his family on Friday morning. Wouldn't it make more sense to take appointments?
Last night I was so excited to go to watch the guys play fútbol, but I never made it there. Karla called to say she was done with school and wanted to stop by my house on the way home. I was excited to have a friend come over and visit. It felt so cool! We were sitting and talking when she received a message that she was supposed to be at school in 10 minutes for something - I didn't quite understand why. So she took the car back to the University so Jose and I never made it to the game.
I watched tv and noticed how I have become oblivious to whether the people on the tv are speaking in Spanish or English. What made it obvious was when a show came on that was in German, which was translated in subtitles to Spanish. I am not fluent in German. I don't know the definition of "fluent", but I think I am fluent now in Spanish. I believe I could even pass a fluency test.
Ayyyy! More thunder! Just in time for our usual evening thunderstorm. Now I remember why thunder always reminds me of Honduras. Everyone is so confused with this weather. It's the talk of every casual conversation. This is supposed to be the dry season, but it rains almost every day. People are worried that the world is going crazy. Well, the thunder is setting off car alarms. I'd better turn off my computer. Good thing I already ran down to the pulperia for some fresh cheese and mantequilla and my laundry is drying in the dining room. I have given up on the clothes line. Hopefully it will dry before it starts smelling musty.
My nephew Joey is really walking today! I saw a video of him toddling across the living room. It was the cutest!
As of today I need only $475 in monthly donations to be able to remain in Honduras.
Here's the link in case you need it: (Fager, Mary Lynn)
https://worldoutreach.org/index.php?option=com_wrapper&view=wrapper&Itemid=117
Thank you to the Feullings for your support!
When I got to the church today Jairo was already there, finished with his medical appointments. I greeted everyone like normal, but Jairo said, "We are very sad today." I asked, "Why are we sad?" Two Sundays ago at church Jairo introduced me to a woman he said is a journalist here, in Tegucigalpa. When he used the word "journalist" I was curious. I have a degree in journalism, so I wondered what kind of journalist she is. Jairo explained that she is a radio host, but her husband has the most famous morning radio show in all of Honduras. Today Jairo said the co-host of the show was kidnapped at 4 o'clock this morning on his way to work. People are wondering if the man will be killed for voicing his opinions on the radio. Jairo was very concerned and encouraged everyone, including all the kids from the Breakfast Program, to pray hard for this man's life. His name is Alfredo Villatodo. He is not from our church, but the man from our church has been doing a radio show with him for 20 years. I haven't heard any more news about that since about 10 this morning.
Lourdes said she was feeling well today. She said she was tired, but happy to be tired, because that means she will sleep well tonight. She said she did sleep well last night, but went to bed late and had to get up early, so she needed a few more hours of sleep. She is walking with less pain today. She said she is doing yoga at home every night because exercise is as important as her meds for the fibromyalgia.
It was pancake day at the breakfast program. We had about 50 kids in the morning group today. They got out of school early today because they are rehearsing for Mother's Day on Friday. Mother's Day here is a huge deal. The kids have been preparing gifts, dances and other presentations for weeks now. On Friday the mothers are invited to the schools, where the kids say their mothers will be showered with gifts. After the presentation the kids and moms will go home. Can you believe they have a half day of school for Mother's Day? Mothers are appreciated in Honduras!
Lourdes talked to the kids today about what they want to be when they grow up. The most popular choice was fútbolista (professional soccer player). Next were doctors, then police, which surprised me because I thought most people do not respect the police here, as they are known to be very corrupt. There were many who wanted to be teachers, professors, fire fighters, a few lawyers and two want to be president.
I felt a strange contradiction within myself as I listened to the kids' goals and dreams. I have always told kids they can do whatever they set their mind to. When I was working with kids in the US, it usually felt truthful. I would love to say to these kids, "You can do it!" But then I think about where these kids come from. I wonder if it is realistic for these kids to be doctors or lawyers or police officers. I feel ashamed to think that way. It's not right that I should ever doubt what they can be. These amazing kids should be everything they want to be, but it is such a huge leap from their current lives to the lives they dream of. I hope God takes them out of this place and shows them how to reach their goals.
One girl wants to be a pastor. Of them all, I think she is a safe bet. She is a beautiful soul. Her mother has Lupus, so she was born with hair that has a different texture and is very thin. She often wears a hat. I think the purpose of the hat is to protect her skin from the sun, because she seems very comfortable with herself. Her mother helps at the breakfast program often. It is crazy when she, her mother and I are in the same room because our names are so similar. She is Meylin. Her mother is Marlen. It gets very confusing.
Jairo came back from running errands today and told us the craziest story! He has to get Josselyn and Aaron's passports renewed so he went to the bank to set up an appointment. The people at the bank said they don't accept appointments, but they see 30 people per day. They told him to come back and wait in line, but come early because they will only see the first 30 people. As he was leaving, Jairo asked the guards what time he should get there so he is sure to be seen. The guard said to come at 4 a.m. Jairo said this area is not safe. He could not bring his family to stand outside in a line with money and documents. They would be perfect targets for thieves. The guards recommended that they bring guns. Jairo said he can't bring his family to a place where he has to bring a gun for protection. The guards assured him that he could shoot anyone he needed to shoot and they would say they didn't see a thing! Jairo ended up finding a bank in a better part of the city where he will have to be in line at 6am with his family on Friday morning. Wouldn't it make more sense to take appointments?
Last night I was so excited to go to watch the guys play fútbol, but I never made it there. Karla called to say she was done with school and wanted to stop by my house on the way home. I was excited to have a friend come over and visit. It felt so cool! We were sitting and talking when she received a message that she was supposed to be at school in 10 minutes for something - I didn't quite understand why. So she took the car back to the University so Jose and I never made it to the game.
I watched tv and noticed how I have become oblivious to whether the people on the tv are speaking in Spanish or English. What made it obvious was when a show came on that was in German, which was translated in subtitles to Spanish. I am not fluent in German. I don't know the definition of "fluent", but I think I am fluent now in Spanish. I believe I could even pass a fluency test.
Ayyyy! More thunder! Just in time for our usual evening thunderstorm. Now I remember why thunder always reminds me of Honduras. Everyone is so confused with this weather. It's the talk of every casual conversation. This is supposed to be the dry season, but it rains almost every day. People are worried that the world is going crazy. Well, the thunder is setting off car alarms. I'd better turn off my computer. Good thing I already ran down to the pulperia for some fresh cheese and mantequilla and my laundry is drying in the dining room. I have given up on the clothes line. Hopefully it will dry before it starts smelling musty.
My nephew Joey is really walking today! I saw a video of him toddling across the living room. It was the cutest!
As of today I need only $475 in monthly donations to be able to remain in Honduras.
Here's the link in case you need it: (Fager, Mary Lynn)
https://worldoutreach.org/index.php?option=com_wrapper&view=wrapper&Itemid=117
Thank you to the Feullings for your support!
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Cheerio Treats
We made Cheerio treats today! Cheerio treats are Rice Crispy Treats without the Rice Crispys. The kids all said, "Que Rico!", which is good and now we have use for all of the Cheerios and the MONTON of marshmallows that the store was going to throw away. We also served rice and hot dogs with veggies, so this was a special treat, like desert.
I had a yummy dinner last night. I made corn on the cobb and ate it with lots of lime juice, plus a plate of 3 tomatoes and a cucumber with salt, pepper, and vinegar. I walked down to the local pulperia - a little corner store, but they have tons of things - and bought everything there. I was going to get an avocado too, but I didn't have enough money. The guy was so patient with me as we went through my pile of veggies to see what I could afford with my 14 limpiras. Turns out an avocado alone is 12 limpiras, but I was able to get veggies and 2 conservas (sweet little coconut candies) so that was a good dinner.
On the way home from the store I had my first frightening experience. Although looking back there was no reason at all to be frightened. I have explained how people all have fences or walls around their houses, so as you walk up the street you can occasionally see through the fence into someone's house. I always peek, because I'm nosey. As I was walking home I was looking around, being nosey, when I was suddenly a foot away from a man, standing pressed against his fence, looking back at me. He was fully dressed in camouflage and was clearly part of the military. It really scared me to be so close to him, but he wasn't doing anything except looking outside. This is one of the big differences between Honduras and the US. Even before it was "the Deadliest Region on Earth" there was always a guard with a huge gun standing outside the bank. Now they are everywhere. I am not used to being around all of these huge guns. The man on my street did not have a gun, at least not one I saw, but I am still not accustomed to men in military uniforms patrolling the streets. Or standing in their front yards.
This afternoon Lourdes sorted through all of the free groceries. We are trying to find a use for
bags of black eyed peas. People here don't even know what black eyed peas are - which is why they don't sell at the store, I guess. We got Arm and Hammer laundry detergent but everyone here uses powder so I had to talk Lourdes into trying it. (She likes it.) There are about 20 boxes of angel food cake mix, 20 boxes of chocolate Silk and huge jugs of mayonnaise and mustard.
Lourdes, Josselyn and I watched on the internet as President Obama read Where the Wild Things Are in respect to it's author who died today. I thought my Mom does a much better version.
I just thought of something. When I first got here I noticed that all of the kids continued to go to Lourdes for simple things that I could help them with. Today was the first time it hit me. For over a week they have been coming to me for things just as often as they go to Lourdes! That is great progress in my opinion. It means they finally trust me. Although yesterday when I took away one of their toys they went to Eunice to try to get it back. Of course, she backed me up.
I am really trying to appreciate the peace and joy I feel every day here. Even on a bad day, I have a sense of happiness that I only find here. Since I'm not sure where it comes from, I'm not sure how to keep it. I believe it can only come from God, because I am not doing any extraordinarily fun things. Digging through stinky, sticky groceries serves a purpose, but it is NOT fun. This is the person I want to be. When I get home at the end of every day I want to feel like, "Wow, that was a great day!" How can I maintain peace and joy if I return to the states? I know that it is fully possible, but I'm not sure how.
I learned today that I have one more sponsor. Thank you, Cia!
It's thundering and lightening. Have to turn off the computer for now. Hope we go home soon because I've had jeans on the clothes line for 2 days that I would like to dry. Oh no! Tonight is fútbol for the guys at the church too! I hope it's not raining at 7 pm. If it is, I'll bring a raincoat. I'm hardcore like that :)
I had a yummy dinner last night. I made corn on the cobb and ate it with lots of lime juice, plus a plate of 3 tomatoes and a cucumber with salt, pepper, and vinegar. I walked down to the local pulperia - a little corner store, but they have tons of things - and bought everything there. I was going to get an avocado too, but I didn't have enough money. The guy was so patient with me as we went through my pile of veggies to see what I could afford with my 14 limpiras. Turns out an avocado alone is 12 limpiras, but I was able to get veggies and 2 conservas (sweet little coconut candies) so that was a good dinner.
On the way home from the store I had my first frightening experience. Although looking back there was no reason at all to be frightened. I have explained how people all have fences or walls around their houses, so as you walk up the street you can occasionally see through the fence into someone's house. I always peek, because I'm nosey. As I was walking home I was looking around, being nosey, when I was suddenly a foot away from a man, standing pressed against his fence, looking back at me. He was fully dressed in camouflage and was clearly part of the military. It really scared me to be so close to him, but he wasn't doing anything except looking outside. This is one of the big differences between Honduras and the US. Even before it was "the Deadliest Region on Earth" there was always a guard with a huge gun standing outside the bank. Now they are everywhere. I am not used to being around all of these huge guns. The man on my street did not have a gun, at least not one I saw, but I am still not accustomed to men in military uniforms patrolling the streets. Or standing in their front yards.
This afternoon Lourdes sorted through all of the free groceries. We are trying to find a use for
bags of black eyed peas. People here don't even know what black eyed peas are - which is why they don't sell at the store, I guess. We got Arm and Hammer laundry detergent but everyone here uses powder so I had to talk Lourdes into trying it. (She likes it.) There are about 20 boxes of angel food cake mix, 20 boxes of chocolate Silk and huge jugs of mayonnaise and mustard.
Lourdes, Josselyn and I watched on the internet as President Obama read Where the Wild Things Are in respect to it's author who died today. I thought my Mom does a much better version.
I just thought of something. When I first got here I noticed that all of the kids continued to go to Lourdes for simple things that I could help them with. Today was the first time it hit me. For over a week they have been coming to me for things just as often as they go to Lourdes! That is great progress in my opinion. It means they finally trust me. Although yesterday when I took away one of their toys they went to Eunice to try to get it back. Of course, she backed me up.
I am really trying to appreciate the peace and joy I feel every day here. Even on a bad day, I have a sense of happiness that I only find here. Since I'm not sure where it comes from, I'm not sure how to keep it. I believe it can only come from God, because I am not doing any extraordinarily fun things. Digging through stinky, sticky groceries serves a purpose, but it is NOT fun. This is the person I want to be. When I get home at the end of every day I want to feel like, "Wow, that was a great day!" How can I maintain peace and joy if I return to the states? I know that it is fully possible, but I'm not sure how.
I learned today that I have one more sponsor. Thank you, Cia!
It's thundering and lightening. Have to turn off the computer for now. Hope we go home soon because I've had jeans on the clothes line for 2 days that I would like to dry. Oh no! Tonight is fútbol for the guys at the church too! I hope it's not raining at 7 pm. If it is, I'll bring a raincoat. I'm hardcore like that :)
Monday, May 7, 2012
Bickering Children (Sorry, I usually try to keep it positve.)
Today Lourdes called me early to say that she was not feeling well and would not be at the breakfast program. Jairo has a Dr appointment at 1pm, but needs to be there at 8 am, and Walter is at La Colonia, picking up more food that they are going to throw away, so I took take another taxi. I was so excited for it to be Monday so I could go back to the Breakfast Program with the kids! I was thinking about others who have a job they hate and dread Mondays. I used to feel that way. But today I was happy to be getting back to work.
I washed some jeans and hung them out to dry before I left in the morning, hoping they will be dry
We had eggs, cheese, beans and tortillas - a feast! But for some reason the kids were so grumpy! They were bickering all day. I had to take away some toys. It felt like I spent the whole day asking them to stop arguing with each other. We got out some board games and they had fun playing. Finally there was some peace. But then they refused to put the games away. I was very disappointed and frustrated. Just as I was about to call a cab to leave, Walter can with a truck FULL of stuff from La Colonia. They even had food in the extended cab. It smelled like a dumpster again, but we unloaded it all and put it away. There were a "MONTON" of marshmallows - the small kind. I asked Lourdes if we can use the Cheerios from La Colonia and make rice crispy treats. We may be eating Cheerio treats for years. Lets hope the kids like them!
We also got a bunch of packages of waffles. It cracks me up because everyone here calls them "waf-lays". They gave us a bunch of Log Cabin sugar free syrup so we can serve waf-lays too. There were tons of jars of that Smuckers jelly and peanut butter. Jairo said the kids will not eat it. I am determined to find a way to get them to eat it. It's so expensive and pretty good for them too.
Lourdes was still in bed, not feeling well when as I am leaving the church. My internet at home has not been working. But I can't complain because I don't pay for it. It just limits my ability to keep my blog as thorough as I'd like.
Now it's raining, so I have to hurry home and get my clothes inside! At least putting all of this food away has given me some time to reset my mind and go home in a good mood. If I have to return to the US, I need to figure out what makes me so happy here so I can be sure to keep this joy with me no matter where I live.
I washed some jeans and hung them out to dry before I left in the morning, hoping they will be dry
We had eggs, cheese, beans and tortillas - a feast! But for some reason the kids were so grumpy! They were bickering all day. I had to take away some toys. It felt like I spent the whole day asking them to stop arguing with each other. We got out some board games and they had fun playing. Finally there was some peace. But then they refused to put the games away. I was very disappointed and frustrated. Just as I was about to call a cab to leave, Walter can with a truck FULL of stuff from La Colonia. They even had food in the extended cab. It smelled like a dumpster again, but we unloaded it all and put it away. There were a "MONTON" of marshmallows - the small kind. I asked Lourdes if we can use the Cheerios from La Colonia and make rice crispy treats. We may be eating Cheerio treats for years. Lets hope the kids like them!
We also got a bunch of packages of waffles. It cracks me up because everyone here calls them "waf-lays". They gave us a bunch of Log Cabin sugar free syrup so we can serve waf-lays too. There were tons of jars of that Smuckers jelly and peanut butter. Jairo said the kids will not eat it. I am determined to find a way to get them to eat it. It's so expensive and pretty good for them too.
Lourdes was still in bed, not feeling well when as I am leaving the church. My internet at home has not been working. But I can't complain because I don't pay for it. It just limits my ability to keep my blog as thorough as I'd like.
Now it's raining, so I have to hurry home and get my clothes inside! At least putting all of this food away has given me some time to reset my mind and go home in a good mood. If I have to return to the US, I need to figure out what makes me so happy here so I can be sure to keep this joy with me no matter where I live.
Sunday, May 6, 2012
The lights are out
Today was a super great day, from start to finish. It was full of challenges, but I loved it! I've decided that I enjoy living outside of my comfort zone and that I am bored unless challenged. I think that, and the love, and the closeness with God that I feel here are all reasons why I am so happy here.
At church I was asked to speak about things I am grateful for. I didn't get nervous, but I would have preferred a little heads up, as opposed to being asked as the music began at the start of the service. First she called up Josue. He, of course, is grateful to be alive after God brought him back from death. I thought, how can I ever follow that? The next girl was grateful because she had never been the type to go to college. But God changed her heart, she began studying, and now she will attend a Christian College in the states! I went after her. I was grateful that after 3 years of prayer, God has allowed me to be in Honduras. I was grateful that God has given my family peace about me being here. (Although later my mother clarified, she does not have peace, it is more resignation. But once she did tell me she had peace, I swear.) I told the church that I am also grateful for the way they welcome me and make me feel like they genuinely care about how I am doing here. Also I said I was grateful to serve the breakfast program. I said that I love each smile and each hug, and that the children are serving me by filling my heart with love and joy, just as much as I am serving them. After church many people thanked me for sharing my testimony.
The service was about miracles. Jairo said he never writes things down, but this week he did. What he had was a list - 2 pages front and back - of all of the miracles that have happened within this church. I am pretty sure these miracles were all withing the past 2 years too, because I know of more things that have happened which were not included but they happened more in the past.
After the service Jairo asked what I thought about church today. I said it was awesome that all of those things happened within this little community. He asked me to type the paper and send a copy to my church in Salt Lake so they can know how God is moving here. I will definitely do that!
It was cloudy all morning and looked like rain, but the sun came out as soon as I got home, so I decided to wash some of my lighter clothes that would dry quickly. I got the laundry done and was walking out the door to do my first independent grocery shopping trip, when I heard a loud CLICK, then another. It was raining. But my clothes couldn't get any wetter. It was one of those hard rains with huge raindrops, so I figured it wouldn't last long. I walked down to the corner, feeling like I was in the middle of a war. The rain was so loud on the tin roofs! At the corner there were no cabs and it was raining harder, plus the wind was picking up, so I decided to wait under an awning with some other people and a motorcycler. A few cabs went by and beeped, but I waited.
Finally one pulled right up close to me, so I ran out and asked him how much he would charge to take me to the super. His price was exactly what I expected so I hopped in and we took off. He was nice and I made it there safely. I needed cash, so I got that first. I figured if anyone was going to follow me and steal my cash, I would notice while I was shopping. Then I pretended to leave the store, but really I was going outside for a cart. Security guards stand at the door, so I thought it was a safe move. And when nobody followed, that was a good sign. I grabbed a cart and took my time shopping. For once, there was nobody else walking with me, waiting for me to make a choice of which beans I wanted, etc. It felt great! I hoped by the time I was done shopping the rain would stop. But I was very, very wrong. It was still raining just as hard, and now the wind was even stronger. I walked outside where everyone was standing under an awning. I wondered what they were all waiting for. I hoped they were not waiting for a cab. Two empty cabs were in the parking lot. I hoped I could get one of them to take me home, but realized they were probably off duty. I made a vow never to grocery shop in the rain on a Sunday again. I knew I could not take the bus, or a collectivo (shared cab) - too dangerous. I was starting to think about who I could call to beg for a ride home. A cab pulled in, but there was a lady in the front seat, not the back, and she sat there talking rather than paying the driver, so I figured it was her husband. I stared at them and waited, but gave up and went back to watching traffic, trying to decide if I should go out to the street and stand in the rain, hoping a cab would pass. Then the lady from the front seat came up to me and asked me if I needed at taxi. Whew!! I ran over, but not too quickly but waited outside to get a price before I got in. He offered a fair price, even in the rain and took me back home safely. He even taught me the names of the flowers outside my house and how to explain most clearly to a driver the directions to my house. I ran through a river that was pouring out of my driveway, and got home safe. My mother was not as thrilled as I was about my exciting excursion.
I mopped the floor, then enjoyed a huge dinner with my new groceries. As I was talking to my mother I was confused to find a puddle of water in the kitchen, but since I am not used to using those long, stringy mops, I thought I had probably left the water there while mopping. When I cleaned it up and it reappeared I realized I had a leak in my ceiling. They neighbors in the front house are gone for the week, so it was only natural that the lights went off for the first time too. But I had candles and a flashlight, so it was no problem. Just funny that the only day I have any problems at home, I'm all alone. It's nice that I do feel so safe there, because the lose of electricity and minor flooding were no big deal.
I got two responses from friends regarding the letter I sent yesterday. Both are passing the information along to others, which is so helpful. One is also offering a monthly sponsorship. Thank you Molly Russell Shew!
Today gave me a taste for how it will be if I really live here on my own permanently. I liked it.
At church I was asked to speak about things I am grateful for. I didn't get nervous, but I would have preferred a little heads up, as opposed to being asked as the music began at the start of the service. First she called up Josue. He, of course, is grateful to be alive after God brought him back from death. I thought, how can I ever follow that? The next girl was grateful because she had never been the type to go to college. But God changed her heart, she began studying, and now she will attend a Christian College in the states! I went after her. I was grateful that after 3 years of prayer, God has allowed me to be in Honduras. I was grateful that God has given my family peace about me being here. (Although later my mother clarified, she does not have peace, it is more resignation. But once she did tell me she had peace, I swear.) I told the church that I am also grateful for the way they welcome me and make me feel like they genuinely care about how I am doing here. Also I said I was grateful to serve the breakfast program. I said that I love each smile and each hug, and that the children are serving me by filling my heart with love and joy, just as much as I am serving them. After church many people thanked me for sharing my testimony.
The service was about miracles. Jairo said he never writes things down, but this week he did. What he had was a list - 2 pages front and back - of all of the miracles that have happened within this church. I am pretty sure these miracles were all withing the past 2 years too, because I know of more things that have happened which were not included but they happened more in the past.
After the service Jairo asked what I thought about church today. I said it was awesome that all of those things happened within this little community. He asked me to type the paper and send a copy to my church in Salt Lake so they can know how God is moving here. I will definitely do that!
It was cloudy all morning and looked like rain, but the sun came out as soon as I got home, so I decided to wash some of my lighter clothes that would dry quickly. I got the laundry done and was walking out the door to do my first independent grocery shopping trip, when I heard a loud CLICK, then another. It was raining. But my clothes couldn't get any wetter. It was one of those hard rains with huge raindrops, so I figured it wouldn't last long. I walked down to the corner, feeling like I was in the middle of a war. The rain was so loud on the tin roofs! At the corner there were no cabs and it was raining harder, plus the wind was picking up, so I decided to wait under an awning with some other people and a motorcycler. A few cabs went by and beeped, but I waited.
Finally one pulled right up close to me, so I ran out and asked him how much he would charge to take me to the super. His price was exactly what I expected so I hopped in and we took off. He was nice and I made it there safely. I needed cash, so I got that first. I figured if anyone was going to follow me and steal my cash, I would notice while I was shopping. Then I pretended to leave the store, but really I was going outside for a cart. Security guards stand at the door, so I thought it was a safe move. And when nobody followed, that was a good sign. I grabbed a cart and took my time shopping. For once, there was nobody else walking with me, waiting for me to make a choice of which beans I wanted, etc. It felt great! I hoped by the time I was done shopping the rain would stop. But I was very, very wrong. It was still raining just as hard, and now the wind was even stronger. I walked outside where everyone was standing under an awning. I wondered what they were all waiting for. I hoped they were not waiting for a cab. Two empty cabs were in the parking lot. I hoped I could get one of them to take me home, but realized they were probably off duty. I made a vow never to grocery shop in the rain on a Sunday again. I knew I could not take the bus, or a collectivo (shared cab) - too dangerous. I was starting to think about who I could call to beg for a ride home. A cab pulled in, but there was a lady in the front seat, not the back, and she sat there talking rather than paying the driver, so I figured it was her husband. I stared at them and waited, but gave up and went back to watching traffic, trying to decide if I should go out to the street and stand in the rain, hoping a cab would pass. Then the lady from the front seat came up to me and asked me if I needed at taxi. Whew!! I ran over, but not too quickly but waited outside to get a price before I got in. He offered a fair price, even in the rain and took me back home safely. He even taught me the names of the flowers outside my house and how to explain most clearly to a driver the directions to my house. I ran through a river that was pouring out of my driveway, and got home safe. My mother was not as thrilled as I was about my exciting excursion.
I mopped the floor, then enjoyed a huge dinner with my new groceries. As I was talking to my mother I was confused to find a puddle of water in the kitchen, but since I am not used to using those long, stringy mops, I thought I had probably left the water there while mopping. When I cleaned it up and it reappeared I realized I had a leak in my ceiling. They neighbors in the front house are gone for the week, so it was only natural that the lights went off for the first time too. But I had candles and a flashlight, so it was no problem. Just funny that the only day I have any problems at home, I'm all alone. It's nice that I do feel so safe there, because the lose of electricity and minor flooding were no big deal.
I got two responses from friends regarding the letter I sent yesterday. Both are passing the information along to others, which is so helpful. One is also offering a monthly sponsorship. Thank you Molly Russell Shew!
Today gave me a taste for how it will be if I really live here on my own permanently. I liked it.
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Confident Expectation
The letter is written. If only it were as easy as writing this blog. I love writing this blog. Usually. Probably because it's all mine and I can choose to use proper grammar and punctuation. Or not. :)
I stayed on my bed ALL DAY writing that darn letter. I did eat some cereal and yogurt first. Then after the first draft I was starving so I made some fried platanos. Checked on FB to see who was available to read my draft and sent it to a few people to get their feedback. Of course my mom said it was already good. Her only feedback was to make sure it was all the same type size in my final copy. Since it was already all the same type size, I didn't have many corrections to make. Aunt Jan helped me put some more feeling into it, which I appreciated. Now I'm waiting on one more friend, then I'll send it out.
My devotional today says, "Come to Me for all that you need... Relax in the knowledge that the One who controls your life is totally trustworthy. Come to Me with confident expectation. There is nothing you need that I cannot provide." Should have read that first thing this morning. I was getting so caught up in the words and really, either people are going to feel led to give, or they're not.
Today is Cinco de Mayo for my friends in the US who like to celebrate Mexican holidays. It is not celebrated here.
The Catholic church started singing at 5 today so I've had a nice backdrop of music for a few hours. Clouds are hiding what is supposed to be a very spectacular moon. Maybe they will part before I go to sleep. Or maybe it will rain. Today has been beastly, as my mom would say, which means hot.
Time now for some pilates. I had planned to get a run in today, but it was simply too hot. All of my muscles have disappeared. Must stop complaining and do something. So I will say good night, pull out my bathmat and do pilates.
No new cockroaches today, but I did hear that gecko running around above my ceiling tile and making little squirrel/gecko noises.
Trying to feel the confident expectation that my letter will be well received when I send it tonight. Not really there yet.
I stayed on my bed ALL DAY writing that darn letter. I did eat some cereal and yogurt first. Then after the first draft I was starving so I made some fried platanos. Checked on FB to see who was available to read my draft and sent it to a few people to get their feedback. Of course my mom said it was already good. Her only feedback was to make sure it was all the same type size in my final copy. Since it was already all the same type size, I didn't have many corrections to make. Aunt Jan helped me put some more feeling into it, which I appreciated. Now I'm waiting on one more friend, then I'll send it out.
My devotional today says, "Come to Me for all that you need... Relax in the knowledge that the One who controls your life is totally trustworthy. Come to Me with confident expectation. There is nothing you need that I cannot provide." Should have read that first thing this morning. I was getting so caught up in the words and really, either people are going to feel led to give, or they're not.
Today is Cinco de Mayo for my friends in the US who like to celebrate Mexican holidays. It is not celebrated here.
The Catholic church started singing at 5 today so I've had a nice backdrop of music for a few hours. Clouds are hiding what is supposed to be a very spectacular moon. Maybe they will part before I go to sleep. Or maybe it will rain. Today has been beastly, as my mom would say, which means hot.
Time now for some pilates. I had planned to get a run in today, but it was simply too hot. All of my muscles have disappeared. Must stop complaining and do something. So I will say good night, pull out my bathmat and do pilates.
No new cockroaches today, but I did hear that gecko running around above my ceiling tile and making little squirrel/gecko noises.
Trying to feel the confident expectation that my letter will be well received when I send it tonight. Not really there yet.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Miss Independent
Today I felt like I was really living independently in Honduras. It was nice. Usually Jairo gets me my water for the house, but every day I hear a man walking by outside yelling "AGUAAAAA" over and over at 7am. (I liked the guy who used to walk by Karla and Jose's house better - he came at an hour when I'm already dressed and he used to yell "AGUA AZUUUUUUL! AGUA! AGUA AZUUUUUL!" Agua Azul is the brand name - like Figi or Aguafina.) I heard my agua man so I quickly threw on some clothes and ran out with the empty container. But he was nowhere. I looked up and down the street and waited but I didn't see him. So I left the container inside the gate and went back to my house. Turns out I can hear him when he does the block behind my house because a few minutes later I heard him again and he was at the top of my street. I waited with my empty container, pretending I knew what I was doing. He came along and said something that I assumed was asking if I lived in the back house, so I said yes. He carried the big old bottle to my doorstep. I was a little worried about that, but I've seen him go into other people's gates, so I guess that's what he does for everyone. It's probably safer for him to exchange money inside the gates, and those bottles are really heavy! They are the ones that offices have on top of water coolers. I had a hard enough time walking from my doorstep through the kitchen with it. I paid him 35 Limpiras and he went on his way. And now I don't have to ask Jairo to get me water.
Jairo went to get a bunch of medical tests done this morning, so Lourdes asked if I could take a cab to the breakfast program. Lourdes had a doctor appointment at noon, so I knew she wouldn't be there either. As I walked down to the corner where the cabs wait, I prayed that I would know which cab to choose that would take me safely to the church. I was ready to bargain, but the second cab I saw was my buddy who took me to church last Sunday when everyone thought I had ridden with someone else. I went straight to him and asked him if he could take me to the church. He said sure. His buddy, who had been chatting with him in the front seat, got out and opened, then closed the door for me. I initiated some small talk on the way there, and asked him for his phone number. That's what you do when you find a cabby you like, you get their phone number and call them for rides. I repeated the number back to him and he told me his name is Jose. I told him I might call him at 1 pm for a ride home and he said that would be fine. We talked about the horrible traffic because of roadwork. Then he took me inside the gate and all of the way around to the church. Last time I was happy because he charged me 70 limpiras. This time he only charged me 60! I don't know why. Last time I rode with him we discussed that if I went to the grocery store, which is so close he thinks I should walk there (but others say it's not safe), I should expect to pay 60 limpiras to get home with my groceries. So 60 limpiras to get to the church is a great deal!
I was late to get to the breakfast program because traffic was TERRIBLE and it wasn't even rush hour. But the girls had everything under control and Marlen, one of the Moms, was there in the kitchen. (Between Marlen and her daughter Maylin I always think someone is calling my name.) Everyone found it hilarious when I exploded into the kitchen proclaiming in Spanish how terrible the traffic was. I don't know why, but whenever I say dramatic things people always laugh. Karla talks like that all of the time and nobody laughs at her, so I'm not sure why it's funny when I do it. They told me I needed to calm down. I was calm, just felt bad because I was so late.
Sidenote: For a culture that is not at all concerned with being on time, I have noticed the strangest thing. If someone asks you what time it is, they want to know the time exactly to the minute - so you answer 3 minutes before 11, for example. I have no idea why those three minutes matter. In the US we would say, "Almost 11" or even say, "11". It's odd to me. I'll have to ask someone about that sometime.
We prayed before the meal. I felt so sad when one of the boys prayed desperately for his father to come back home. His father moved out of the country to be with another woman. I could hear in his prayer how much he misses his father. I wonder if his father has any clue how much his children long for him.
After we were done with prayer, the kids ran to wash their hands. They know they are supposed to
walk, though it is hard. They usually walk when Lourdes is there. But today all of them ran. There was even some pushing. One boy fell down on the cement, so I asked them to all come back and sit down. At first they stood there looking at me. Then some of them came back. Finally, when they realized I was serious and was going to wait until they all came back, they walked over and sat down. I told them I am sure they know the rules about running and pushing, then asked who is ready to walk. Everyone's hands shot up so I told them to go ahead. They did speed walking, which is normal, over to the line and washed their hands nicely.
I sat down and had breakfast with them, which was nice. Then most of them left, after brushing their teeth with the new toothbrushes. A few stayed and played checkers with the chess set. The girls stayed and practiced their dance. There were more dancers today. The ones who were not here yesterday still need a lot of work. They like the dance, but it is long and parts are fast. I told them I am going to video tape it on Mother's Day. I'll post it on my blog. They love seeing photos of themselves on my blog or on Facebook.
We cleaned up the church so it will be more ready for Sunday. It is so cute to see the tiny ones helping out. Sometimes they are more helpful than the older kids. We got everything done and they knew they were supposed to leave, so a few of the boys hid behind the bodega playing. When I found them one boy was lying on the ground hurt, and the rest were playing a rough game of fútbol around him. I reminded them this is not time to play and they had to leave, then corralled them out the door.
After talking Eunice a little, I called Jairo because he had expected to be at the church to take me home, but he wasn't there. He and Josselyn both went to Lourdes' doctor appointment, which was something Lourdes really wanted, so I was happy about that. Lourdes feels bad because sometimes she doesn't have the energy to do things the way she used to. She said she is not the same mother she used to be. I am sure that is true, but Josselyn is 19. She is capable and willing to help if Lourdes asks. Lourdes was hoping the doctor could explain to them why she is not able to do all of the things she used to. I think they do understand, but Lourdes will feel better after they hear it from the doctor too. Lourdes said that she was very happy because the doctor told her she was doing everything right. She said he emphasized that exercise is as important as the medicine. He also gave her a different, stronger medicine, but told her she was still doing well because some people need 18 pills to control their fibromyalgia and she only needs one. She felt good about that.
Then she told me that she was with Jairo and they would not be coming to the church at all today because his mother just had some sort of a stroke in her face. They were going to be with his mother and find out what is going on. I was thinking that it is unfortunate that Jairo's brother, who is a doctor, is in Argentina right now. I told them I can call my taxi driver and get a safe ride home.
I called the number, but he either had his phone off, or the battery was dead. It was an hour past the time I told him I might call. Eunice called her usual driver, but he was at the hospital with someone. Then she called another backup person she uses, but he was busy too. We started to worry about how I would get home because in the area of the church, I cannot walk down to the corner and get a cab. Many people are killed on that corner. That is also where the kids keep getting hit by cars. Finally, Eunice's backup driver told her he would send someone else whom he trusts. Eunice seemed skeptical and told him that that cab was for someone else (me) and the person absolutely would not pay more than 60 Limpiras for the ride. She said she has had to argue with cabbies over price lately. So when the cab showed up she told me to wait before I got in. She confirmed that I would only have to pay 60 Limpiras. (I could have done that. I did appreciate her help but it spoiled my day of complete independence!) Once again I made an effort to talk with the driver. I told him that I am going to have a car here soon and I'm nervous about driving. He asked if I am a good driver. I said yes, in the states I have driven in the biggest cities at rush hour with no problem, but here is very different! He said walk, don't run. I said if I go slow I will never get anywhere, only aggressive drivers get anywhere here. I also told him I think it is safer to be aggressive than to go slow with these drivers. He said I should not be impatient about long lines and that I should practice during the day, not during rush hour. Good advice. Then he dropped me at my house, took my 60 limpiras and went on his way.
I got home to find a pile of flying ants dead on my kitchen floor. I ran into the bedroom to see if there were any more, but thankfully, they stuck to the kitchen. I also found the daily dead cockroach on it's back. Only this one wasn't completely dead because after I took a picture, before I had time to clean it up, it flipped over on its belly somehow! Yuck!!
I made another huge dinner, which was delicious. But then the unsecured internet I have been "borrowing" from neighbors wouldn't connect so I was BORED! I wanted to see if I could get that letter out to ask for more funding, but still had no words. I wanted to go running, but it is dark here by 6pm, so that was out of the question. I ended up watching some tv. At one point I noticed I was watching The World's Strictest Parents in Spanish and didn't realize for a while that it wasn't in English. I watched some travel shows and the Simpsons in Spanish. Finally I found The Shawshank Redemption. Forgot how great that movie is. They both made it to Mexico and I fell asleep.
Jairo went to get a bunch of medical tests done this morning, so Lourdes asked if I could take a cab to the breakfast program. Lourdes had a doctor appointment at noon, so I knew she wouldn't be there either. As I walked down to the corner where the cabs wait, I prayed that I would know which cab to choose that would take me safely to the church. I was ready to bargain, but the second cab I saw was my buddy who took me to church last Sunday when everyone thought I had ridden with someone else. I went straight to him and asked him if he could take me to the church. He said sure. His buddy, who had been chatting with him in the front seat, got out and opened, then closed the door for me. I initiated some small talk on the way there, and asked him for his phone number. That's what you do when you find a cabby you like, you get their phone number and call them for rides. I repeated the number back to him and he told me his name is Jose. I told him I might call him at 1 pm for a ride home and he said that would be fine. We talked about the horrible traffic because of roadwork. Then he took me inside the gate and all of the way around to the church. Last time I was happy because he charged me 70 limpiras. This time he only charged me 60! I don't know why. Last time I rode with him we discussed that if I went to the grocery store, which is so close he thinks I should walk there (but others say it's not safe), I should expect to pay 60 limpiras to get home with my groceries. So 60 limpiras to get to the church is a great deal!
I was late to get to the breakfast program because traffic was TERRIBLE and it wasn't even rush hour. But the girls had everything under control and Marlen, one of the Moms, was there in the kitchen. (Between Marlen and her daughter Maylin I always think someone is calling my name.) Everyone found it hilarious when I exploded into the kitchen proclaiming in Spanish how terrible the traffic was. I don't know why, but whenever I say dramatic things people always laugh. Karla talks like that all of the time and nobody laughs at her, so I'm not sure why it's funny when I do it. They told me I needed to calm down. I was calm, just felt bad because I was so late.
Sidenote: For a culture that is not at all concerned with being on time, I have noticed the strangest thing. If someone asks you what time it is, they want to know the time exactly to the minute - so you answer 3 minutes before 11, for example. I have no idea why those three minutes matter. In the US we would say, "Almost 11" or even say, "11". It's odd to me. I'll have to ask someone about that sometime.
We prayed before the meal. I felt so sad when one of the boys prayed desperately for his father to come back home. His father moved out of the country to be with another woman. I could hear in his prayer how much he misses his father. I wonder if his father has any clue how much his children long for him.
After we were done with prayer, the kids ran to wash their hands. They know they are supposed to
walk, though it is hard. They usually walk when Lourdes is there. But today all of them ran. There was even some pushing. One boy fell down on the cement, so I asked them to all come back and sit down. At first they stood there looking at me. Then some of them came back. Finally, when they realized I was serious and was going to wait until they all came back, they walked over and sat down. I told them I am sure they know the rules about running and pushing, then asked who is ready to walk. Everyone's hands shot up so I told them to go ahead. They did speed walking, which is normal, over to the line and washed their hands nicely.
I sat down and had breakfast with them, which was nice. Then most of them left, after brushing their teeth with the new toothbrushes. A few stayed and played checkers with the chess set. The girls stayed and practiced their dance. There were more dancers today. The ones who were not here yesterday still need a lot of work. They like the dance, but it is long and parts are fast. I told them I am going to video tape it on Mother's Day. I'll post it on my blog. They love seeing photos of themselves on my blog or on Facebook.
We cleaned up the church so it will be more ready for Sunday. It is so cute to see the tiny ones helping out. Sometimes they are more helpful than the older kids. We got everything done and they knew they were supposed to leave, so a few of the boys hid behind the bodega playing. When I found them one boy was lying on the ground hurt, and the rest were playing a rough game of fútbol around him. I reminded them this is not time to play and they had to leave, then corralled them out the door.
 |
| Misael putting the chairs away. He is a great helper! |
After talking Eunice a little, I called Jairo because he had expected to be at the church to take me home, but he wasn't there. He and Josselyn both went to Lourdes' doctor appointment, which was something Lourdes really wanted, so I was happy about that. Lourdes feels bad because sometimes she doesn't have the energy to do things the way she used to. She said she is not the same mother she used to be. I am sure that is true, but Josselyn is 19. She is capable and willing to help if Lourdes asks. Lourdes was hoping the doctor could explain to them why she is not able to do all of the things she used to. I think they do understand, but Lourdes will feel better after they hear it from the doctor too. Lourdes said that she was very happy because the doctor told her she was doing everything right. She said he emphasized that exercise is as important as the medicine. He also gave her a different, stronger medicine, but told her she was still doing well because some people need 18 pills to control their fibromyalgia and she only needs one. She felt good about that.
Then she told me that she was with Jairo and they would not be coming to the church at all today because his mother just had some sort of a stroke in her face. They were going to be with his mother and find out what is going on. I was thinking that it is unfortunate that Jairo's brother, who is a doctor, is in Argentina right now. I told them I can call my taxi driver and get a safe ride home.
I called the number, but he either had his phone off, or the battery was dead. It was an hour past the time I told him I might call. Eunice called her usual driver, but he was at the hospital with someone. Then she called another backup person she uses, but he was busy too. We started to worry about how I would get home because in the area of the church, I cannot walk down to the corner and get a cab. Many people are killed on that corner. That is also where the kids keep getting hit by cars. Finally, Eunice's backup driver told her he would send someone else whom he trusts. Eunice seemed skeptical and told him that that cab was for someone else (me) and the person absolutely would not pay more than 60 Limpiras for the ride. She said she has had to argue with cabbies over price lately. So when the cab showed up she told me to wait before I got in. She confirmed that I would only have to pay 60 Limpiras. (I could have done that. I did appreciate her help but it spoiled my day of complete independence!) Once again I made an effort to talk with the driver. I told him that I am going to have a car here soon and I'm nervous about driving. He asked if I am a good driver. I said yes, in the states I have driven in the biggest cities at rush hour with no problem, but here is very different! He said walk, don't run. I said if I go slow I will never get anywhere, only aggressive drivers get anywhere here. I also told him I think it is safer to be aggressive than to go slow with these drivers. He said I should not be impatient about long lines and that I should practice during the day, not during rush hour. Good advice. Then he dropped me at my house, took my 60 limpiras and went on his way.
I got home to find a pile of flying ants dead on my kitchen floor. I ran into the bedroom to see if there were any more, but thankfully, they stuck to the kitchen. I also found the daily dead cockroach on it's back. Only this one wasn't completely dead because after I took a picture, before I had time to clean it up, it flipped over on its belly somehow! Yuck!!
 |
| Now that is a big cockroach! |
I made another huge dinner, which was delicious. But then the unsecured internet I have been "borrowing" from neighbors wouldn't connect so I was BORED! I wanted to see if I could get that letter out to ask for more funding, but still had no words. I wanted to go running, but it is dark here by 6pm, so that was out of the question. I ended up watching some tv. At one point I noticed I was watching The World's Strictest Parents in Spanish and didn't realize for a while that it wasn't in English. I watched some travel shows and the Simpsons in Spanish. Finally I found The Shawshank Redemption. Forgot how great that movie is. They both made it to Mexico and I fell asleep.
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