Feeling Helpless

I feel so helpless!

Ana just called to thank me for a bag of school supplies I sent to the church with Fany yesterday.

When I talked to Ana last week to plan Isabela's birthday she told me she was stressed out. Ana's never stressed. Even when she has no food in the house or when she is diagnosed with cancer she doesn't get stressed. She prays and has faith God will take care of everything.

However, this year she is facing a new situation. Normally she spends about $75 on the kids at the start of the school year, but this year she has not been able to save money. All of the kids wore through their backpacks last year. Their uniform pants are too short and they have no basic supplies.

Usually they receive some supplies from the government through the church. But this year the government donation was extremely small and it has to stretch for all of the kids of the breakfast program. Now that school started back up the church is serving less kids, but there are still about 70 kids with very few supplies to go around.

Impacto Juvenil hasn't handed anything out yet. I'm hoping they do this week. Ana's kids already have homework they can't do because they are supposed to do it with a two subject notebook, which they don't have. This will affect their grades. And there is nothing I can do.

Ana has been taking in clothes to wash (by hand) in order to make money. She washed so many clothes she can't lift her arms. Her back and neck are a mess too. She said she was blessed recently by a neck massage by a friend from the US, which helped a lot, but the doctor wants her to take medication which she hasn't been able to buy. She won't buy the medication for herself until her children have school supplies. Even though she can't lift her arms.

This started weeks ago, when the team from the US was here. At that time she asked for ibuprofen and blamed it on making pupusas for over 100 people. She never mentioned washing tons of laundry by hand.

She probably wouldn't have let it slip that she can't lift up her arms, but she was explaining that she is cutting back to only volunteering two days each week now at the breakfast program because she is exhausted. Between washing laundry for neighbors, cooking for Impacto Juvenil, and volunteering at the church, she feels overwhelmed.

She was told she is putting money before God when she decided to cut back to two days per week at the church. To that she responded that she knows God would want her to work to feed and clothe her kids. She said she has had a lot of quiet time with God and that's what she feels called to do, so no matter what others say, she has peace.

Gosh. I am so frustrated. I feel angry, partly because I can't get out of bed and help her. I also think it's unfair that she works so hard and still is not able to provide for her kids. Never mind a medication so she can use her arms. In reality she is working three jobs - at the church, for Impacto Juvenil, and now washing clothes. On top of that she's a single mom, raising four kids. How could she not be overwhelmed?

I was thinking about back to school time for when I was a child. I had so many new clothes, I often wouldn't wear the same outfit twice for more than a week. David and Jired need PENS. They have one uniform each from last year and the pants are too short. I just can't imagine.

Somehow, God provided everything for Samuel. I had most of it here in my closet. I never knew it was waiting in my closet to go to their house.

I'm waiting to see if Molly plans to go into Los Pinos tomorrow. If she is headed that way I'm going to ask her to pick up two notebooks and the medication for Ana. A friend of mine offered to help Ana with school supplies the last time I wrote about Ana's situation in my blog. I think now the only thing they need are two backpacks and uniforms. But that will have to wait until I can drive.

Ana said her stress is not emotional. She has faith that God will provide for her children to study. She says once she can stop working so much she will feel better. She's right, I just wish I could help.

***** Update***** Molly just called. She doesn't have time to buy the stuff before her trip into Los Pinos tomorrow morning. But she will buy it and take it to Ana on Wednesday. Ana is happy and appreciative.